Chapter 25 We All Have Our Demons
Gracie
Ryland and I arrive back at the motel with two bags of snacks. There are too many, but it is better than not enough. I also managed to pick up a tee at the store. It is a horrible, cheap one, but it is enough to sleep in. I got the largest size to make sure it covers me.
"Shall we see if we can find a crappy movie to watch, brown eyes?"
I nod. Sure, why not? I am going to the bathroom to change. I will be back in a minute."
I take the tee from the bag and head to the bathroom, locking the door behind me. I can't risk him walking in. I strip myself down to my underwear and cover myself with the tee. Thankfully, it goes all the way to my knees. I pull my hoodie over the top of it, too. Tugging at both to make sure they stay in place, I exit the bathroom. Ryland is sitting at the bottom of the bed, stripping down to his boxers. I make sure to keep my eyes away from him and climb into bed, slipping under the covers.
Ryland hands the remote to me. "Ladies' choice."
I laugh and take it from him. "Thank you, kind sir."
I switch it on, flicking through the channels searching for a movie channel. I find a movie that I have heard of, but it will do for now. It seems like a romance movie. I don't mind romance movies.
Ryland groans from next to me, rolling his eyes. "Can they not show a horror movie or something? I hate romance movies."
"Tough! You will just need to watch it."
"Meh! I think since you are making me watch this shitty movie, I deserve snuggles." He bargains.
He pats his chest, inviting me to lie down on his chest. I hesitate for a moment, but I do move closer. I rest my head on his chest, and his arm wraps around me. I place my hand on his stomach, the heat from his skin heating up my cold hand. We focus on the movie, and Ryland plays with my hair. I don't even know if he realises he is doing it. I curl tightly into him, wanting the same feeling of security and comfort as I did last night when I was wrapped in his arms.
Ryland kisses the top of my head. "I got you, brown eyes, you are safe with me. I promise."
Ryland seems to know I am going through a lot, even though I haven't told him. It's as if I am an open book to him.
I reach up and kiss his cheek. "Thank you."
His attention turns to me, and he pushes the hair away from my eyes. "Gracie, I don't know exactly what you are going through, but I know you are going through a lot. I hope one day you will learn to trust me enough to tell me what is happening in your life." He says softly.
I can't understand why he is invested in me. I am sure he has better things to do than waste all his time with me.
"I don't know if I ever will, but please know that has nothing to do with you. It is all me. Plus, if I did tell you, you would walk away, and I wouldn't blame you." I sigh.
He would, everyone leaves in the end. Who would want to have someone like me in their life?
Ryland caresses my cheek. "Gracie, we all have our demons and scars. We all have our secrets and our reasons for being broken. It doesn't mean we need to go through life alone."
I feel the tears in my eyes as he said the words to me. It is evident to see that he has his own struggles, too. He is also fighting his personal demons.
"Something tells me you haven't had an easy life either," I say softly.
"I am fighting my own battles. I have been for a long time. Maybe when we are ready, we can share our battles with one another."
I don't know what he is going through or what he has been through, but there is a part of me that feels relieved I am not the only one struggling. I don't mean that in a selfish way. I mean, if we do open up, then we can understand each other.
"Maybe…"
We fall silent, but our eyes stay connected. Ryland cups my face gently, inching closer to me. I swallow hard, and my breathing becomes louder. Is he going to kiss me again? I want him too, badly. I decide then in the moment that I am going to make the move, and hopefully he will accept it. I close any space between us and brush my lips against his. A soft groan escapes from his lips. I run my fingers through his hair and cover his lips fully with mine. I whimper against his lips at the feeling of his lips on mine again.
Ryland places his hand on my hip, holding me against him. I trace my tongue over his lips, asking for access, which he grants without hesitation. My tongue slips into his mouth, finding his. Our tongues dance perfectly together. It is a slow and gentle kiss. I have never had a kiss like this. Then again, I have only ever kissed one other boy. I can only imagine how many girls' lips he has had against his. How many girls he has been with. I see the way the females swoon over him.
I play with his hair as our lips move in sync. I am struggling to get the air into my lungs. The kiss is making me breathless. I need to pull away to catch my breath. I part first, hesitant. I open my eyes to look at him. Ryland's eyes are still closed, his breathing heavy, and a beautiful smile painted on his lips. I smile and run my thumb over my lips, which are tingling.
He finally opens his eyes to meet mine. "Wow."
"Yes." I agree.
Ryland pecks my lips once more before we settle back down for the movie. I snuggle back into him. There are no words spoken between us. It is a serene silence. I am glad I decided to stay here with him tonight. I couldn't think of a better place to be.