Chapter 28

FOUR. MONTHS LATER

DANILL

Holland lies on the couch, her hand resting on her belly, which is starting to show. Her pregnancy announcement should have come as a surprise to me, she certainly was surprised by it, but it didn’t.

I knew she wasn’t consistent with her birth control and I didn’t urge her to be either. I want this baby. I want to keep her tethered to me. I don’t care how that makes me sound. It’s the way that it is.

I’m looking at my computer, trying to do some research on a hit that Kazimir sent me this morning. Digital trails are my first go-to when I have a new hit. I gather as much information as I can there, then I do a physical search and tail of them.

There is a noise on the television and I look up just in time to see a picture of Claudia flash across the screen. Holland must see it too, because I feel her shift next to me and the volume of the television goes higher.

“They found her body,” she gasps. “I didn’t know.”

Claudia all but disappeared and I can’t even say I’m sorry about it, but I didn’t know where she was. Marie and Holland have had plenty of late-night discussions about the weird events that happened around the time we got married. One of them being that both Claudia and Nate disappeared at the same time.

Marie offered the suggestion that perhaps they ran off together and I made sure to chime in with my agreement. Mainly, I don’t want to have to admit out loud to my wife that I killed the man she thought was her best friend. I also don’t want to have to be the one to tell her that his obsession with her was more than a little crush.

The reporter goes on to tell the world that Claudia’s body was found in a shallow grave in the backyard of Nate’s home. I try not to show a reaction, but inside, I’m fucking floored by the information. Looking over to Holland, she’s sitting forward, her elbows on her knees, her hands covering her wide-open mouth.

She turns to me, tears swimming in her gaze as she watches me for a silent moment. “He killed Claudia,” she breathes.

Nodding my head once, I’m just as surprised as she is, so thankfully I don’t have to hide my reaction. “He did,” I agree.

“Here I was annoyed that they’d run off together and didn’t bother even letting us know they’re okay and she’s been dead this whole time. I’m the worst person.”

Those tears that had been swimming in her eyes, they spill over and down her cheeks. Reaching out to her, I wrap my arm around her shoulders and pull her close to my side. She rests her cheek against my shoulder and lets out a sob, then she trembles.

“I feel like a horrible person,” she whimpers.

I don’t tell her that I’m the horrible person here, she doesn’t need to know any more than she does. Lifting my hand, I touch my palm to her hair a few times, running it down the length, before I start over. After a few strokes of my hand against her head, she lifts her face and looks up to me.

“You’re not a horrible person, kroshka. How were you to know what happened, huh?”

“I should have called the police to look for her or something. It’s been months, Danill.”

I hum, dipping my chin and kissing each of her cheeks in an attempt to kiss her tears away. It doesn’t work. They’re salty, sweet, but she does give me a small smile, and that’s all I need to know that she is for sure going to be okay.

“You could have called the police, but then what? As far as you knew, they were off playing house somewhere. Wasn’t her family concerned after not hearing from her?”

She shakes her head. “We’re friends because our families are all trash. That’s what bound us together at such a young age. Granted, I was the only one who moved away from my family at fifteen, but their parents weren’t the best.”

Lifting my hand, I cup her cheek and run my thumb across her skin. “You are not responsible for her, kroshka.” “I feel guilty,” she says on a whisper.

Leaning forward, I touch my mouth to hers with a brush of my lips. “Nyet, Holland. You will not feel guilty. You played zero part in this.”

Dropping my hand, I place it against her growing belly. “You cannot take the blame for what Nate did to her. You had no part in it, kroshka. You are truly innocent. I will not allow you to worry yourself over it and upset our child.”

“You’re so controlling, do you know that?” she asks as her lips curve up into a smile.

I grin down at her, sliding my hand around to the back of her hair and grip the strands. She licks her lips as she looks up at me. Touching my mouth to hers, I tug her head back slightly. Sliding my tongue along her bottom lip, I taste her. “I know I am. You fucking love it, don’t you?”

She lets out a sigh. “You know that I do. But you can’t tell me how to feel about this, Danill.”

I snort. “I can tell you that there’s absolutely nothing to feel guilty about. Mourn your friend, but do not take the burden of her death and place it on your shoulders. I’ve seen a lot in my life, Holland. This situation is not yours to take on.”

The news anchor goes on to say that Nate is missing as well and that the police and FBI believe he took off to places unknown after killing Claudia. His identification was still at the home along with his phone, but his safe was left empty and the door open, as if he left in a rush.

Again, I almost laugh. His safe was left empty because I took the contents of it, kept the cash, and burned the rest.

Fuck Nate.

Pressing my mouth to hers again, I slide my tongue inside and I sweep it around to taste her. She whimpers, leaning closer toward me, her body melting. I know that she is no longer thinking about Claudia and Nate. It’s not that she’s forgotten about them, it’s that I’ve distracted her for the moment.

She lifts her arms, wrapping them around the back of my neck and sighs. Her nails dig into my shoulder and I grunt, loving the way that it feels.

Sinking my teeth into her bottom lip, I break the kiss, then look down at her. “Bed?”

She shifts her gaze to the side before she brings it back to meet mine. “It’s early.”

“I’ll order dinner, we’ll eat it naked in bed together.”

Her breath comes out shakily and she nods her head before she speaks. “I want that.”

Chuckling, I touch my mouth to hers. “I know you do, kroshka.”