Chapter 67 Chapter Sixty Seven
"You are not allowed to talk to Noah anymore." Jace growled, his voice low and dangerous.
I gaped at him, shocked by his audacity. Who the heck did he think he was? My dad?
But I barely had time to consider that or figure out a way to escape him.
He was already moving toward me, backing me up step by step until my legs hit the edge of his bed.
The same bed I swore I would never touch, because it was unprofessional and immoral.
"What?" I tried to sidestep him, but he just mirrored my movement, blocking my only way out. "Since when? He's been nothing but nice to me, Jace. He's the first person in Westbrook who's actually—"
But he was beyond listening at that point, he shoved my my shoulder lightly with one hand and my knees buckled.
I fell backward onto his bed, the mattress soft beneath me. “Wait, wait… We can talk about this.” I tried to reason with him.
Jace followed me down, he braced his hands on either side of my head, caging me in, his body hovering over mine but not quite touching.
He was close enough that I could feel the heat of him against me, the smell his cologne; something musky and expensive that made my head spin.
"I've known Noah my entire fucking life," he said, his voice a rough whisper.
His face was inches from mine, his dark eyes searching my face with an intensity that made my heart stutter. "You've known him for what? Two days?”
“But—”
“He doesn't do anything for free, Lena. Think about it for a second, for fucks sake! A new guy coming out of the blue one day to follow you around and solve all your problems?”
“I just—”
“Sooner or later, princess, he's going to ask for what he's owed, and you'll have no choice but to give him what he wants."
He was talking to me but his eyes were focused on unbuttoning my shirt, pulling each one out one by one as heat flooded through my body, pooling low in my stomach.
This wasn't like being with Noah at all.
With Noah I felt comfortable and safe and at ease, like I had someone watching out for me who cared only about my happiness.
But being here with Jace like this was dangerous. He was a burning fire, full of sharp edges and the promise of getting burned.
And heaven help me, I wanted it anyway.
Jace looked like he was teetering on the edge of control, his jaw tight, his pupils blown wide. Only one second away from tearing the rest of my clothes off and doing something we'd both regret.
Or not regret. I wasn't sure anymore.
"Jace." My voice sounded breathy and embarrassing, even to me. "We can't do this. Your brother is waiting for me downstairs and I need to go do my job."
"Martin will recover from the heartbreak," Jace said, and then he reached up and carefully pulled my glasses off my nose.
The world went soft and blurry around the edges.
He tossed them onto the far corner of the bed, and then his mouth was on my neck, leaving hot, open-mouthed kisses that made my toes curl.
His lips traced a burning path from the sensitive spot just below my ear, down to my jaw, across to my collarbone. Each kiss was consuming and possessive, as he tried to brand me as his.
"I asked you to wait and talk to me," he murmured against my skin, his breath hot. "And you fucking ran away. Why the fuck would you do that?"
"Of course I ran away." My hands found his shoulders, gripping tight even though I knew I should be pushing him away. "You looked like you wanted to murder me."
"I wanted to murder Noah," he corrected, his teeth grazing my pulse point in a way that made me gasp and shiver. "There's a difference. I could never hurt you."
Liar. I thought.
But I couldn't help it, my hands slid into his hair, my body arching up into his despite every logical thought screaming at me to stop.
This was forbidden. It was dangerous, and everything I shouldn't want.
But I did want it. I wanted it so badly I could barely think straight.
"He can't be trusted, do you understand that?” He said suddenly, pulling back just enough to look at me. His hand came up to cup my face, his thumb brushing across my cheekbone.
“Noah can't be trusted, he’s playing you, Lena. Stealing you from me when you were mine first…”
"I was never yours," I interrupted, but my voice lacked confidence.
"The hell you weren't."
"At least Noah can talk to me in public without being ashamed of me." I muttered angrily, cutting through the haze of desire. "I don't think about Noah that way, Jace. And even if I did... would it really be so bad?"
Jace went rigid above me, his entire body tensing as if I'd slapped him.
"Are you fucking serious right now?"
"I saw you noticing us in the cafeteria today and you walked right by me like we didn’t exist, or I was some disgusting freak that you couldn’t ruin your reputation by talking to..."
“Enough.”
“But it’s not enough. First you say you want me, then you hold me and touch me like this like I’m just a cheap little fling you can you with in secret. I can’t be your Allison, Jace.” I tried to shove him off me, growing more frustrated now, but he didn’t budge.
“Wait, I…”
“Just leave me alone, okay? It’s fine.” I shoved at his chest again, but still he didn’t let me go.
"No." He cut me off, his voice rough with fury "No, it’s fine. Jesus Christ, Lena, I'm working on it, okay? I'm trying to figure out how to…"
He broke off, running a hand through his hair in frustration. “You think this is easy for me? You think I know what the fuck I'm doing here?"
"Then tell me what you're doing!" I pushed at his chest again, and he let me sit up, though he didn't move away. "Tell me what this is, Jace, because I don't understand. You ignore me at school, you act like I don't exist, and then you pull stunts like this and I just… I don't know what you want from me!"
"I want you to stop looking at him the way you look at me!" The words exploded out of him. "Fuck! I want you to stop smiling at him, stop laughing at his jokes, stop letting him touch you like he has any fucking right to…"
"And what about you?" I demanded, my anger rising to match his. "What right do you have?"
"More than him!" His hands were on my waist now, gripping tight, and I realized with a start that I'd been leaning into him, my body betraying me even as my mind screamed warnings.
"I'm the one who wants you, I’m the one who cared enough to notice you were basically fucking starving yourself.”
“Don’t talk about that, I’m handling it.” I muttered.
“Don’t you get it, Lena? I'm the one who can’t get you out of my head, no matter what I do. I'm the one who lo—" He stopped himself, breathing hard.
"The one who what?"
"Nothing. Forget it."
"No." I grabbed his face, forcing him to look at me. "The one who what, Jace?"
His jaw clenched. "This is the first time in my life I've ever had to convince a girl to be with me, you know that? The first time I've had to actually work for it. And you're sitting there asking me if it would be 'so bad' if you were with Noah instead? That's fucking unbelievable, Lena. It's…”
"Jace." My heart was pounding so hard I thought it might break through my ribs. "Tell me the truth."
"What truth?"
I took a breath, steadying myself. "Do you have feelings for me?"
The question hung in the air between us.
Jace went completely still. His hands dropped from my waist like I'd burned him. The color drained from his face, leaving him looking almost pale in the dim light of his bedroom.
"I—" He started, then stopped. His mouth opened and closed, but no sound came out.
I'd never seen him look like this. Lost. Vulnerable. So terrified.
"Jace—"
Knock Knock Knock!
A loud knock on the door made us both jump.