Chapter 60 Chapter Sixty
stood outside the gym doors, my application form clutched so tightly in my hands that the paper was starting to crumple at the edges.
Through the small window, I could see them—the cheerleading squad in all their coordinated glory. They moved in perfect synchronization, their uniforms bright and crisp, ponytails bouncing as they executed flips and formations with practiced ease.
"Five, six, seven, eight!" Allison's voice rang out sharp and commanding. "From the top! And this time, Madison, actually point your toes. We're not doing modern dance here."
The girls reset, panting slightly, then launched into the routine again. A series of backflips rippled across the front line. The flyers went up, held steady by their bases, arms locked in perfect Vs.
They looked amazing. Professional. Untouchable.
And I wanted to be one of them so badly it physically hurt.
It felt almost trivial now, compared to everything else happening in my life—the debt, my mom's exhaustion, Jace's confusing hot-and-cold behavior, Noah turning my world upside down in the span of twenty-four hours.
But this? This was about being normal. About finally belonging to something. About not being invisible anymore.
My hand reached for the door handle, then dropped.
I couldn't do this.
"You've got this," Noah's voice came from behind me, gentle and encouraging.
I jumped slightly, turning to find him leaning against the wall, that easy smile on his face.
"I can't," I whispered. "I thought I could, but I can't."
"Why not?"
"Because she's going to say no. She always says no. And doing this in front of everyone is just going to make it worse."
Noah pushed off the wall and came to stand beside me. "Or," he said quietly, "she says yes, and you finally get to do something you've wanted for years. Either way, you won't know unless you try."
"Noah—"
"Come on." He took my hand, warm and solid, and pushed open the gym door before I could protest.
The music cut off abruptly.
Every single girl turned to look at us.
Allison's expression went from neutral to ice-cold the moment she saw me. She crossed her arms, her voice dripping with false sweetness. "We don't need anyone cleaning the gym until tryouts are done, Lena. You can come back in an hour."
Heat flooded my face. My feet started moving toward the exit automatically, muscle memory from years of being dismissed, of knowing my place.
She'd called me the help. In front of everyone. Like that's all I'd ever be.
"Hey, Ally." Noah's voice cut through my retreat, still holding my hand. He pulled me back gently but firmly. "Actually, we're here for tryouts."
Allison's laugh was sharp. "Tryouts are by invitation only for returning members. Everyone else needed to submit applications last week—"
"Go on," Noah said to me, his thumb brushing across my knuckles. "Tell her what you told me."
I shook my head frantically, my voice coming out in a whisper. "No. I can't. Let's just go."
"Don't worry. I'm here." His voice was low, meant just for me. "Just tell her what you want."
Allison was staring at us with barely concealed fury, her jaw tight. Behind her, the squad had broken formation, some of them stretching, others whispering to each other and watching us with undisguised curiosity.
"Girls!" Allison snapped without turning around. "Formation B, now! We have a game tomorrow and half of you still can't nail the basket toss. Move!"
They scrambled back into position, but their eyes kept drifting to us.
I forced myself to meet Allison's glare. My hands were shaking, but I made myself speak.
"I think I'd like to try out for the cheerleading squad."
For a moment, there was complete silence.
Then Allison threw her head back and laughed—a bright, cruel sound that echoed through the gym.
"Oh my God, Noah!" She turned to him with a dazzling smile, like I'd just told the funniest joke she'd ever heard. "You're so funny, bringing the DUFF along to make jokes. I didn't know you had such a great sense of humor."
She stepped closer to him, her voice dropping to something almost sultry. "If you like, you could take me out to dinner sometime and I'll show you even more fun."
Her hand trailed down his chest shamelessly, her eyes locked on his.
Noah caught her wrist gently but firmly, removing her hand. "That's really flattering, Allison. But I wouldn't want to get on my cousin's nerves—I know you two are an item."
He paused, his voice going firmer. "And also? She isn't joking."
Allison's smile faltered. "What? But I already said no to her like ten times already." She gestured at me dismissively. "Clearly she's not cheerleader material. Nobody wants to look at a whale in a tiny skirt. They want pretty, thin girls who actually look good in the uniform."
"Ally." Noah's voice took on a warning tone. "No need to be so rude. We're friends, right?"
Behind Allison, her squad had abandoned all pretense of practicing. Tracy was whispering to Madison, both of them pointing at me and giggling. Another girl made a comment I couldn't quite hear, but the laughter that followed made my face burn.
"Please," I muttered to Noah, tugging at his hand. "Let's just go. This was a mistake."
"Yeah, we're friends," Allison said, her voice brightening artificially. "And in Biology we got assigned to that project together, so we'll probably get even closer than friends." She emphasized the last word with a meaningful look.
"Exactly," Noah said calmly. "So do me a solid and be polite to Lena. Listen to what she has to say."