Chapter 28 I Need This To Go Right For Him!
April
My “date” with Corran is tomorrow night. It should be interesting. I have never pretended to be someones date. But, now, as I go through my clothes, I am regretting saying yes. I don’t have date clothes. I will need to buy something. I am not going to make Corran buy it for me. I can do that myself. I have the money, and I am back at work, so all is good. I can afford an outfit without issue.
I groan as I look at the mess with my clothes lying around. A family laugh echoes through my bedroom. I turn to where it is coming from and find Corbin lying on the bed, watching me in amusement.
“How long have you been here? Stop laughing at me.” I whine and cross my arms over my chest.
“Not too long. Enough to watch you freak out. Why are you freaking out so much? It isn’t like it is a real date.”
“I know that, but it is a chance for Corran to get everyone off his back about getting back to dating. I want to be able to do that for him. I can only imagine how hard it must be. It was different for me when I lost you. I didn’t have anyone, so I had no one getting on at me or trying to set me up on blind dates. I need this to go well for Corran,” I sigh and run my fingers through my hair.
I don’t want to mess this up for him. It is the only way people will leave him alone. I sit on the edge of the bed and shake my head. Corbin takes the spot next to me. “It will be fine. Are you sure that is the only reason you are freaking out?” he asks softly, his eyes to the ground.
His tone has changed. The last time he tried to encourage me to have some fun with Corran. Now, he seems disappointed that I am going on a fake date with him. I can play this one of two ways. One, I can say I told you so because I knew he would get jealous or two, I can ask if he is okay. The second one is the right one. I don’t want to make him feel bad.
I turn to face him. “What do you mean?”
“I mean, are you sure you aren’t freaking out because you want it to be real?” he whispers and makes eye contact with me.
“I don’t want it to be real, Corbin. You seem bothered by it. I can cancel.”
I don’t want to do anything to hurt Corbin. I don’t want to let Corran down either, but Corbin will always come first, even if I am the only one who knows he is around. I wouldn’t want to make him jealous or hurt by seeing me going on a date with another man.
“No, don’t cancel. You should go. I guess it is hard because it isn’t something I can do for you anymore. I don’t want you to be alone, April. I know I tried to encourage you to go on a real date with Corran or at least a friends-with-benefits thing, but the more I see you with him, the harder it gets. I am happy you have a friend, and if one day, it did turn into more, I would accept that, but it just won’t be easy.” He sighs.
I rest my hand on his knee. “I know it must be hard, but I promise you, all I want from Corran is a friend, nothing more, so you have nothing to worry about.”
I mean every word. I don’t want any other man. I will be happy alone for the rest of my life if it means he will stick around.
Corbin shakes his head. “I don’t want that for you, though. I want you to find someone else.”
“I don’t want someone else. How many times do I need to tell you this?”
I am trying not to get annoyed, but we have the same conversation way too often.
“Okay, I am sorry. So, do you see something you want to wear, or do we need to go shopping?” he asks, changing the subject.
Thank God, because I am done with this conversation. “Shopping it is, and you need to come with me. You aren’t getting out of it.”
A smirk curls on his lips. “Any excuse to get you half naked, my pretty angel.”
I laugh loudly and slap his arm. “You are such a perv.” Some things never change, even after death. I am glad he didn’t change too much.
Corbin smiles brightly at me, not trying to deny it. With a shake of my head, I tidy up the mess I made. If I leave it and come back to it, it will piss me off more. I only have a couple of hours before the shops close, so I can’t take forever, by the time I get there. I will need to order a taxi. I really need to buy myself a car. It will make life easier, especially to get to work. It is something else I will add to my list. The never-ending list. I still have so much to do and get until I have everything I need.
Once I clean up, I call for a taxi, gather what I need and head out. I will buy a dress, something cute and classy. I don’t want to get something sexy. I don’t want Corran or his friends getting the wrong idea. I love sexy dressing; there is nothing wrong with it, but I have no reason to do so. I am not trying to get Corran into bed. I am just his date for one night.
“Wouldn’t you bet better asking Corran for a lift? It is dark outside. I don’t like the thought of you going out alone.” Corbin sighs.
“I will be fine. I promise. I will get a taxi to where I need to go, get what I need and then return home in a taxi. I don’t want to bother Corran. Plus, if I tell him where I am going, then he will insist on paying, and I don’t want that.”
Corbin nods, knowing not to try to change my mind. I will be fine. It isn’t like I am walking the dark streets alone, plus there will still be plenty of people around. I will be safe. I don’t plan on being out long.