Chapter 12 It Shouldn't Be Weird
Corran
April and I are on her floor on a blanket, where we have been for the last couple of hours after dinner. There is something peaceful about it. It is quiet. The emptiness of the flat, I think, may add to that. The lights are dimmed, and music plays quietly in the background; we can hear it and no more. We are a little tipsy and picking at the leftover food. We have been talking and laughing. It has been a relaxing night. It is better for me to be here, safe with someone I can talk with, rather than out at a bar, alone, getting wasted and leaving myself vulnerable to everyone around me.
“Do you want some more wine? Finish off the bottle?” I ask.
“Yes, but I think it will be the last. I am a little drunk, and I know when tomorrow comes, I will be hungover.” She laughs.
“Yes, good idea. Wine hangovers are horrible.” I chuckle, finishing the bottle off between the two glasses.
“You and I have very different ideas of what a glass of wine is. I usually only half fill it.” She laughs.
“That is us, Scottish for you,” I reply, taking a sip.
“Yes, I will never be able to catch up.” She snickers.
“You will learn in time.”
Suddenly, April glances over my shoulder and furrows her brows before shaking her head. What the hell? I glance behind me, wondering what she could be looking at. There is nothing but a wall and the hallway.
“What are you looking at? Is there a ghost that I can’t see?” I ask.
April freezes, and her face stiffens. “What? No, of course not.” She replies, laughing it off, but the tone in her voice sounds like she is lying.
I notice her eyes dart behind me again, and then her body relaxes. Of course, she can’t see a ghost! Who can see ghosts? No one and anyone who says they can is either lying, crazy or imagining things because it isn’t possible.
April sprints to her feet, excusing herself to use the bathroom. If I didn’t know any better, I would say she is trying to avoid me. A shudder runs through me, and a stranger feeling takes over. A sudden feeling of someone watching me takes over. I shift where I sit, glancing around. I am imagining things. It must have been the talk of ghosts. Sometimes, I feel like there is a presence around me, but this time, it is different. It is making me uncomfortable. I am being paranoid. I give myself a shake and laugh. There is no one here! I hear April return a few minutes later.
“My butt is getting sore sitting on the floor. Do you want to go to my room and sit on the bed? Please don’t think I am offering you anything. I am not. It is just a suggestion to be more comfortable.” She asks nervously.
I rub the back of my neck, as nervous as April seems to be. “Um, okay.”
April rocks on her heels. “We don’t need to. We can stay in here if you would be more comfortable?”
It isn’t like we are doing anything wrong. We will be doing the same thing we have been for the last few hours. The only difference is that we will be sitting on her bed rather than the floor.
“Sure, can we take the food with us?” I chuckle, trying to lighten the atmosphere.
April laughs. “Yes. I don’t mind food in my bed. Do you want it heated up?”
I shake my head. “No, I don’t mind cold Chinese food.”
“Okay, then you take that through. I will get us some water and a sweet treat. I have some chocolate in the mini fridge.’
I could go with something sweet. I nod, gathering the containers and taking them to the bedroom while April goes to the kitchen. I set the food down on the bed and stand awkwardly in the middle of the room.
April’s beautiful laugh echoes from behind me. “You can sit on the bed.”
I glance over my shoulder. “Sorry, I wasn’t sure if I should wait.”
“Make yourself comfortable.”
I already have my shoes off, so I don’t need to take them off as I climb onto the bed, making myself comfortable like April suggested. She joins me, handing me a bottle of water, setting the sweet treats aside for later. Things will be a little awkward to start with, but hopefully it won’t take long for us to relax.
April turns to look at me. “Is this weird for you? Being in another woman’s bed? Even innocently? I won’t lie, it feels weird for me having another man in bed next to me.”
“Yes, it does. The last woman I was in a bed with was Edin.”
“Same, Corbin, for me. It shouldn’t be strange, though, because we aren’t doing anything wrong.”
“No, we aren’t. It is probably just because it has been a while, and the last time we both did it, it was with the people we spent most of our lives with. Do you want to go to my place?”
“No, it is okay. I only wanted to be open and honest.”
“I appreciate it. It is better to be open and honest. Do you want to watch a movie? I have my laptop and my internet got connected before I arrived?”
I am sure April will be glad when she has everything she needs. I will hang around to help her if she wants me to.
“Sure, a movie sounds good,” I reply with a smile.
April grabs her laptop, sets it up, placing it between us, and we find a comedy to watch. April loses herself in the movie. I glance over at her and smile. She is beautiful. I find myself lost in her for a moment. I spot a cute little batch of freckles on her cheek, almost shaped like a heart. I need to stop. If she catches me, then it will make things awkward. Sighing, I quickly pull my gaze away from her and focus on the movie. I haven’t noticed the beauty of a woman since I lost my wife until April. I can’t go down that road. It would be too much for me, for April. I shouldn’t even be thinking about it. Even the mere thought of it causes guilt to course through me. The thing is, Edin told me to find someone else, but I don’t want to.