“Surprises are never a good thing,” Alison muttered as she sat in the back seat of the car beside Trent.
“They can be,” he said.
She shook her head then pulled the seatbelt so it didn’t rub against her neck. “Not in my experience. Why don’t you just tell me where we’re going? I thought we couldn’t leave the house.”
“Call this a much-needed mental health field trip. And don’t worry, we made sure we weren’t tracked.”
Which explained their first stop at the large, private hospital, where they’d taken the elevator up, then the stairs down to a lower parking garage that had a different car waiting, Daniel already having the keys.
Not that any of that told her where exactly they were going.
All she knew for sure was that she’d woken up exhausted, as she had the last few mornings, and the alphas had been ready to go. They’d packed her a bag and told her to get into the car.
The auction was only a week away, now. It meant their final visit had to happen any day. As much as she enjoyed their routine, a sense of unease had plagued her, especially after Kyle’s little slip-up.
She chalked her not feeling well up to that. How could she be expected to sleep or function when she had so many things running at full speed through her head?
When they arrived at the destination, she narrowed her eyes at Trent.
He only shrugged. “Figured you could use a break.”
“This is Tiffany’s house.”
She’d never been there, at least not officially. However, after Tiffany had settled in with her mates in the home belonging to the doctor, Marshall, Alison had made damned sure to drive by, to know where it was.
She’d figured it was only a matter of time before it went to hell, before she would need to swoop in and save the young girl, and she’d much rather be prepared for that inevitability.
The fact that it hadn’t happened yet amazed her.
Stranger still, Tiffany looked happier each time she saw her, as though the things Alison feared not only hadn’t happened, but she somehow enjoyed her life more and more.
Then again, how have you felt these last few weeks?
She shook her head as though she could shake away the unwanted thought. This was a ploy, nothing else. She’d taken them up on the rest not only because it would make their cover more believable, but also because she’d never have a chance like this one again. Not taking advantage of it would have been foolish.
She let the half-truth sit, because examining it might make her admit to things she wasn’t ready to.
Tiffany rushed from the house, her blonde hair bright in the morning sun. She’d always been effortlessly beautiful. Alison knew she was pretty, but Tiffany seemed to embrace her looks in a way Alison never really managed.
On the young omega’s heels were her mates, Kieran and Kane looking as unhappy and dangerous as ever and Marshall smiling as if he liked…well, everything.
Alison left the car when it became clear there was no good way out of the get-together, even more because Tiffany had now seen her. While she’d never encouraged a relationship with the girl, upsetting her had always felt like kicking a puppy. One just didn’t do it.
Tiffany hugged her, the action uncomfortable, especially with all six alphas standing around and staring. After that, she dragged Alison by the wrist, and even when Alison offered a pleading look to her alphas for some help from the overly-excited blonde girl, they only grinned.
Useless alphas.
Half an hour later, Alison sat in her bikini on the edge of the pool, her feet in, with Kara beside her.
The event had been even larger than she’d realized, and by the time everyone had arrived, she wished she had just turned around and left, even if it meant upsetting Tiffany.
Claire had come, her alphas and her infant daughter along. Tracy, her daughter, and her three mates were there. Kara, of course, and her mates, and lastly Ashley, who Alison hadn’t met but whose mates she knew enough not to trust, had all attended.
Alison knew Kara professionally rather than personally, partly because she never cared for getting too chummy with others. Still, it was hard to have another omega in town who did whatever the fuck they wanted and not at least be acquaintances.
“Don’t babysit,” Kara told her quickly. “I did, and there isn’t enough whiskey in the world for that nonsense.”
“You gave her daughter whiskey?”
Kara laughed, leaning her weight back on her hands. “Oh, no, I drank the whiskey. Cullen is surprisingly good with kids. By the time Claire got back, I was wasted.”
Alison chuckled at the irreverent blue-haired girl’s story. The truth was, it was impossible to know if Kara was lying or telling the truth. Alison had learned that early, but it didn’t mean she didn’t trust the girl—well, as much as she trusted anyone. Kara wasn’t the type to sell her out, but the details of any story she told were likely only fifty percent true—at best.
“How is mated bliss?”
Kara cast a heavy side-eye. “You thinking of settling down?”
“Well, I had figured neither of us ever would, but you went and blew that to hell.”
Kara kicked her feet to splash her mate, Damon, who was swimming in the pool with Tracy’s daughter. He grinned in her direction, cupped water and splashed Kara.
She laughed before turning her attention back. “What can I say? I wanted someone who had to take care of me when I’m old and gray and can’t see anymore. That’s why I collected the young one. He’ll be able to read well past the rest of us.”
Kara’s flippant words didn’t hide the affection beneath them. She might pretend that the alphas she’d chosen meant little to her, but the truth rested in the way she looked at them, in the way she’d unconsciously lean toward them.
Is that love? Alison hadn’t ever had that, hadn’t known it or understood it.
In fact, she’d written off the entire idea as a joke, as some sort of trick people used to justify the idiocy of pairing off. She’d seen how well matings worked in her lifetime, and she’d never once believed love had anything to do with it.
It was a fairytale people told themselves to excuse their bad choices.
Except…when she turned her gaze to find her alphas seated with Kieran and Joshua and Bryce, a pang went through her chest.
Could she ever have this sort of life? Could she ever fit into this sort of world? Smile and laugh and play with the offspring of her friends, be comfortable in a social setting? Just another person enjoying a party?
It all felt beyond her.
Even right then, the most she managed was to sit off to the side with Kara. Claire stretched out, Kaidan sitting behind her on the chair. Tracy held Claire’s daughter, smiling down at the baby as if she were the most precious thing in the world. Ashley sat beside Tracy, clearly gearing up to steal the infant for her own cuddles. Their alphas all might have sat back, engaged in their own conversations, but the connections were still obvious. They’d glance over, gazes seeking their mates as if drawn. Only once they’d found them would they return to their own talks.
It was all so normal. Wholesome. Kara had never quite fit in, much like Alison, which might be why they both sat on the outskirts of the party.
Though, from the start, when Alison had walked in to find Kara holding the infant, talking with Claire, it had been obvious that the other woman, for all her faults, had found a place in the group.
And it was a place Alison doubted she could fill, even if she wanted to.
Being part of a group like this felt like tearing off a tiny piece of armor for each of them, risking herself for each of them.
Not that she wouldn’t put herself at risk—she’d made her life’s work taking care of omegas like these—but actually getting to know them, having any sort of lasting connection?
That wasn’t her. It wasn’t safe and she didn’t think she even knew how to do it.
Her stomach rolled, telling her exactly what it thought about the entire idea.
The very idea of friendships made her want to throw up.
“Looking a little green there,” Kara said, no sympathy in her voice.
“I think I’ve reached my limit of sisterhood.”
Kara let out a laugh that said, no, she didn’t feel sorry at all for Alison, the bitch. She called over to Tiffany. “Goodtime gal here needs to throw up. Can you show her the bathroom?”
Alison rolled her eyes at the way the entire party ground to a halt around her. Being the center of attention was something she hated, and yet there she was, the spectacle.
“Are you not feeling well?” Trent was the first over to her. He pressed his hand to her forehead as though to check for a temperature.
Alison shoved his hand off, but a sharp look made her go still. The last thing she wanted was to risk a punishment—or even a sharp word—in front of the others. She couldn’t imagine living down the hit to her reputation if Daniel decided to threaten to spank her ass, or the way her cheeks would always heat and her breath would quicken when he did.
Trent felt her head again. “No fever.” He crouched. “Are you sick, pet?”
Kara snorted at the name before walking away.
“No. I didn’t sleep well, and I need to go to the bathroom. Kara’s just a little…colorful.”
Trent pressed his lips together, as if he wasn’t sure whether to believe her or not.
However, Tiffany bumped into him as though he wasn’t a good hundred pounds heavier than her and pure muscle. “Come on, I’ll show you where my bathroom is. Stop hovering, Trent, she’s fine. Probably too much sun, since you’ve all had her cooped up in that house for over a month.”
Trent lifted his lip as if to snarl at Tiffany, but seemed to think better of it. Snarling at mates, even without any malice, could easily spark a fight between alphas.
Tiffany again took Alison’s hand, as she had when she’d arrived, and tugged her toward the house. Tiffany guided her past the guest bathrooms downstairs, going to the second floor and into what was clearly her room.
“Don’t you sleep with the alphas?”
Tiffany glanced around the room decorated with flowers and bright painting. “What? Oh, yeah. This is the room where I keep my stuff and where I usually sleep. Kieran, Kane and Marshall each have their own room, but usually one or all of them end up in here.”
Which explained the massive bed. It looked as large as two kings up against each other.
How does someone even find a bed that big?
Before she could think too much about it, Tiffany guided her through the room to her private bathroom. It was bright, done in mostly whites and marble. “There’s medicine in the drawer if you have a headache or anything, and feel free to jump in the shower if you just need to rinse off from the sun.” Tiffany offered a sweet smile. “Or if you want a bit of privacy where people can’t hover.”
Alison closed the door behind Tiffany after a quick ‘thank you’. Just getting away from the party had already helped settle her stomach and her nerves.
It again told her this wasn’t a place for her. Even if she pretended she was capable of and wanted a relationship with the alphas, this entire friendship-and-family thing was something she lacked the skills—and possibly the genes—for.
She thought about her family, about her uncaring father, about her beaten-down mother, and the truth was that she didn’t know anything about how to behave or form connections like the ones between these people.
Daniel, Kyle and Trent might have already become part of this group, but she never would.
Yet another reason why we’d never work out.
She opened the drawer Tiffany had pointed to, and sure enough, a pharmacy’s worth of medication was there, all labeled and organized. The benefit of being mated to a doctor.
She found the pills for her headache, but before she grabbed them, her gaze caught on something else.
A blue box, one of six stacked together.
Pregnancy tests.
Was Tiffany trying?
She seemed far too young to be a mother, and yet some omegas got pregnant far earlier. Or perhaps they had the tests just in case, to check after a heat.
A person could wait the weeks until their period started, but the nice tests, like these, could check a bit earlier. At the very least, they could get a positive while still in the ‘late period or pregnant?’ stage.
Which made her stomach roll again.
Alison did the math in her head, quick and frantic. Five weeks had passed since her heat.
Five weeks and no period. She was still in the range of it being possible, since an omega could get her period between four and six weeks after a heat, but her exhaustion and headaches and all of it turned sinister.
She grabbed a test with shaking hands, reading over the directions three times when she couldn’t seem to absorb the information on the first two goes.
She took the test, then set it on the counter and paced.
Please, be negative. She repeated the words like one of those stupid self-help affirmation tapes, as if she could will that into the universe by sheer belief alone.
Her stomach was worse, her breath quick. She hadn’t really considered becoming pregnant to be a possibility. She wasn’t the mothering type. What the fuck was she going to do if it was positive? She couldn’t have a child. She had no idea what to do with a kid. She hadn’t really had parents, so who the hell was she going to emulate?
And all those issues ignored that she’d be walking away from the alphas the second the case was over. The last thing she wanted was a reason for them to argue about it.
She glanced at the clock, dread settling deep inside her as the seconds ticked away until she could check.
Finally, it was time. The test sat on the edge of the counter like a trap, as though if she didn’t look, it couldn’t hurt her, couldn’t be true.
She crept forward as though trying to avoid being noticed, like she could see it without it seeing her and that would somehow make things okay.
Her stomach rolled as she looked at it, as she read the tiny window for the answer. As quickly as she did, she bolted for the toilet and up came everything she thought she’d kept down.
Two lines. I’m pregnant…
Kyle’s gaze had shifted up toward the house every minute since Alison had left.
He’d seen the look on her face, the paleness of her cheeks.
She’d needed to get away. She didn’t handle get-togethers like this well, it seemed. Which he couldn’t say he fully understood.
She’d known these people better and for longer than he had. Sure, she might have kept her distance from the alphas, but she knew the omegas. She’d been friends with them, even if she didn’t talk much about it.
So why she couldn’t just relax and have fun, he didn’t understand.
“I don’t think you should see her anymore,” Dylan said.
Kyle jerked his gaze back, ready to bare his teeth until he realized the alpha was talking to Tracy and not him.
“She isn’t that bad.”
“You just told me she broke some man’s arm,” he deadpanned.
“To be fair,” Kara said, “the man grabbed a waitress’s ass. I feel like that’s almost wearing a ‘please break my arm’ shirt.”
“I broke a man’s hand when he grabbed Ashley’s ass,” Erik added, no repentance in his voice. “Hand is better. You put an arm in a sling and it’s fine. Hand? All those little bones? It’s a far longer lesson.”
Ashley’s mouth gaped open before she shoved Erik’s arm, as if scolding him.
He caught her and pulled her into his lap despite her weak protest. “People who touch what is mine don’t deserve to have unbroken limbs.”
Kyle chuckled at the exchange. The more time he spent with these people, the more he found himself missing this sense of family. He’d moved around with Daniel so much, been away from what little family they had for so long, he’d forgotten how much he enjoyed the feeling of belonging.
Maybe we should think about setting down some roots.
Trent had done it, creating himself a life there. Why couldn’t they? Hell, maybe all of them could move forward.
“You are missing the best part of the story,” Kara said, as though breaking the arm of a man wasn’t the most interesting bit. “The man’s friend got all upset. I think they were planning on double-teaming the girl or something, the perverts.” A snort of laughter from a few of the others—given that they all shared women—said what they thought about that statement. “So he gets in Alison’s face, and he is huge. I mean, he makes Trent here look tiny, and Alison is just standing there, doing that blank face she does, letting him go off. He throws a punch but the idiot is already pretty drunk, so she dodges it, and when he’s off balance, she’s able to slam his face down into the table. I think there might have been teeth on the floor. No one ever grabbed Anne’s ass again.”
The name caught his attention. “Anne? The omega who’s missing?”
That sucked the humor from the story out of the room, the reminder that while the get-together might be fun, reality wasn’t so forgiving.
Claire answered, nodding. “Yeah. I met her a few times, and she was—”
“Is,” Tracy said firmly, as if the belief were enough for it to be true.
Claire seemed less convinced but took the correction anyway. “Is very sweet. She’s only in her early twenties, never calls any of us for anything. Any omega going missing is hard, but her? She’s just the sort of person you think the world should leave alone. Like, there are those ones who are just too fragile, too good, who shouldn’t have to deal with the bullshit of the world. That’s Anne.”
Trent again cast his gaze up, toward the house, pieces fitting together a bit more about Alison’s dedication to the case, about how quickly she’d been willing to leap into something most people would take a minute or two to consider.
Worse, he thought about what would happen if they were too late…
He didn’t think Alison would ever forgive herself if something happened to her friend, but he hadn’t found the world to be an overly kind place.
* * * *
Daniel had pressed his lips together when Alison hadn’t come down for dinner.
He wished she was storming around, throwing a fit, because he knew exactly how to handle that.
Hell, he enjoyed dealing with her temper tantrums.
Instead, she’d been quiet when they’d returned from the party. In fact, she hadn’t really recovered after going to the bathroom. She’d assured him she wasn’t sick, but she’d never engaged with anyone else. She would sit off to the side, close enough that no one felt she was left out, but far enough to not be part of the conversations.
Then again, was it that different from the start of the party? Alison didn’t seem like she fitted, or at least like she wanted to fit.
She watched over the omegas, always tense when they were curled up with an alpha, as if she were waiting to need to jump in and save someone.
The best way to describe her was a lifeguard, there on duty, sitting above everything else but not a part of it.
Which seemed silly, since he’d never met a group of people who seemed happier or more content with their mates and their lives.
Still, she had watched.
When they got back to the house, after a changeover at the hospital and collection of new medical documents to prove the visit, should anyone have tailed them and asked, she’d gone to her room for a shower.
That had been two hours before and she hadn’t left yet.
“She might be getting herself pretty,” Kyle said, a grin on his lips. “You know women have to do all that shaving to get ready.”
Daniel gave him a glare in return. “I don’t think that takes two hours.”
“Maybe she’s relaxing, or taking a nap?” Trent, ever the optimist, said.
Maybe.
“Whatever it is, dinner is almost here. I guess I’ll go let her know.”
Trent pointed a finger at him. “Be nice. If you scare her, she might not come down at all.”
“I am always nice.”
“You fucked her ass until she cried.”
Daniel spread his lips into a wide grin. “Oh, yeah, trust me, that was nice.”
Trent growled softly but let Daniel go up the stairs without another word.
He knocked on the door, surprised when she called for him to come in.
Inside, he found her sitting back on the bed, a damp rag on her forehead.
“Hey, sweet. Not feeling good?” All those things he’d been thinking slipped away, replaced with a sudden worry and need to fix the problem.
She looked at him, and it was then he noted the dark circles beneath her eyes. Why hadn’t he noticed them before? Perhaps the sun from the day had brought them out more. “I’m just not feeling great.”
Her words were soft, and it didn’t take a genius to hear the lie.
Or at least the omission.
Daniel sat on the edge of the bed before he dragged his fingers across her cheek. “What’s wrong? And don’t tell me nothing.”
“Why not? If I’m not feeling good you won’t punish me.”
“I won’t right now, but I have a long memory.”
She stared him down for a moment before letting out a long breath, slow and heavy. “My heat was five weeks ago.”
The first thought that popped into his head pleased him far more than it should have. He thought about the infant at the party earlier, thought about how Alison would look, a baby cradled in her arms. She’d be the fiercest mother he’d ever seen.
Before all the thoughts could go through him, before he could ask, she kept talking. “I started bleeding.”
All those pictures crashed down around him. He fought not to look disappointed. His life wasn’t set up for a kid. They weren’t prepared for a kid. It was for the best, and the last thing she needed was for him to make it any harder or make her feel guilty.
He slid over beside her, then placed an arm down so her head was on it before he pulled her against his side. “I’m sorry you’re not feeling well. Do you have what you need here? If not—”
“I do. Everything was already under the sink.” She said the words quickly, as though she needed to get the conversation over as fast as possible. Then again, females could be strange about such subjects. Beta males tended to be as well, to be fair. Alphas? He supposed it was due to that primal part of them. Blood was a part of life and periods were only the logical conclusion to a heat when the omega didn’t conceive. He didn’t find much to be squeamish about.
However, she hadn’t grown up around very caring people, always used to dealing with shit on her own, so he gave her some privacy. She already didn’t feel good—there was no reason to torture the poor girl.
“I guess that explains why you didn’t look like you felt so good today.”
She nodded, melting against his side in a way that made him tighten his grip more. He didn’t care for her being sick, but he loved those times when her defenses came down, when she stopped keeping him at a distance. Often it happened slowly, as if she lost the strength to fight him anymore, until the real woman beneath all those coping mechanisms came out.
Wetness dribbled down her forehead from the rag, soaking into his sleeve, but he didn’t care.
“Are you disappointed?”
She tensed, her eyes closing again. Eventually, she answered. “No. I would make a horrible mother.”
“I don’t know about that.”
She snorted. “I don’t have a maternal bone in my body. I won’t even hold Claire’s daughter. I have no idea what a good mother even looks like.”
He danced his fingers along her arm as he answered. “You’re tough, and you’re protective. I think you’d make a great mom, someday, when you’re ready.”
She sighed, then whispered a question. “Are you disappointed?”
He considered lying to her. He wanted to tell her no because that was what she wanted to hear.
He didn’t lie, though, and especially not to her. The trust that needed to exist between the two of them was too important to risk breaking over anything, least of all this.
“A little. I hadn’t even thought about it, to be honest. I’m not looking to have kids any time soon, but when I walked in, when you said it was five weeks ago, I had a moment of picturing it. If we’re putting it all out there, I’m not sure I’d make a good dad, either. Kyle and I have moved around so much. What kind of life would that be?” He shook his head. “No, this is the best outcome.”
She made a sound in the back of her throat, something that seemed to indicate she’d heard him, but didn’t give him any idea what she thought about it.
Worse? The last thing he said ran through his head.
This is the best outcome. He fought to decide if that was true.
Because it sure didn’t feel true.
Before he had to deal with it, the door opened and Kyle walked in, his normal smile missing.
“What happened?” Even as Daniel asked, he remined there, his arm around Alison.
“We got the call,” Kyle said. “Tomorrow night is the last meeting, and it looks like they’re not fucking around. They’ll be sending the head of the organization.”
Which meant they needed to be ready.
Shit was about to get very real.