My sight tunneled in onto their hands. I tried to monitor my heartbeat because I know the slightest irregular rhythm would probably give me away.
When I raised my eyes, I met Kiara’s twinkling ones. She was plastering a smile on her face. I think it was supposed to be a kind one but knowing how much of a snake she was, I saw straight through her act and caught the malice she was masking behind that smile. She was happy to see me like this.
I heard the heartbeat monitor speed up as I breathed heavily. I brought the kids that were sitting by my sides closer to me as I glared at Adam in anger. How dare he bring that bitch into this room.
Adam seemed unfazed by my glares and continued to lead Kiara and himself closer to my hospital bed. I hugged the kids tighter to my side and I saw Maddison holding Preston’s arm.
I narrowed my eyes at Adam when he didn’t stop walking towards me. When I felt that he had reached the borders of my personal space, which was 5 meters from the hospital bed, I snapped at him to stop.
“Keep your bitch away from me or I will not be held accountable for what I will do to her if she’s within my arms reach.” I growled at Adam. Preston was between us in a flash. His face was flushed, and his hands were in fists, clearly as upset as I was at his younger brother.
I heard Adam snort, “You’re on a hospital bed, Case, what do you think you could do?” Adam mocked. I scoffed at him, the nerve of this asshole.
“Case, I don’t like her,” Cali whispered to me but it wasn’t low enough that Kiara didn’t hear it. I saw Kiara’s narrowed eyes at Cali and I immediately snapped.
“Keep your goddamn eyes elsewhere. If you dare glare at her again, I will scoop your eyes out of their sockets and feed them to my grandparents’ piranhas.” Kiara immediately casted me an ugly look and rolled her eyes.
“Bite me,” Kiara muttered quietly.
“Trust me, I’ll sharpen my canines just to have the satisfaction of using them to tear you piece by piece.” I gritted out. I made sure to press the kids' heads onto my shoulders to cover their ears so that they wouldn’t have to hear my descriptive threats.
“That is enough, Case!” Adam said sternly. “Don’t you think you’re being too childish? I get that you’re on a hospital bed but that doesn’t give you the right to speak that way to Kiara just because you’re jealous.”
“Jealous?” I hissed menacingly. Oh, he did not.
“Yes, jealous!” Adam exclaimed in exasperation.
“Why the hell would I be jealous?! She’s dating a nincompoop!” I yelled at him, ignoring the frantic beeping of the heart monitor as I breathed heavily. “How are you so blind, Adam? Everyone else can see her as the witch that she is except for you. How could you trust her over your own flesh and blood?” I questioned in bewilderment.
“Because I know for a fact that they only think so poorly of her because you told them so. They’re blinded by you,” Adam accused. I could see now that Preston’s shoulders were shaking now but it was Jerry that spoke on my behalf.
“Just go Adam, bring Kiara somewhere else. We’re here for Case and right now she needs to rest. If you’re only going to rile her up then it’s best that you leave.” Jerry sighed out in defeat but I could see that Adam was having none of it.
“How are you defending her over your own son?! How could you be so blind?!” Adam yelled at his father. I could feel my face heating up with all the blood that’s rushing to my head. I can’t process the amount of disrespect he was showing Jerry. It was Preston who stepped in.
“Casey is in this hospital room because of you, you asshole! The least you could do is trust her! She risked her life to keep all of us safe! Your distrust shook her focus and almost cost her her life. Why don’t you think about that the next time you accuse her of being a liar?”
Adam glared at all of us, “If I remembered correctly, I tried to stop her from fighting but she was stubborn and made her decision.” Jerry looked at his son in disbelief and Preston shook his head at his brother. I felt like I was getting an extra hit on the spot where my heart laid.
“Leave, Adam.” Preston gritted out. All the while, I locked eyes with Kiara and I saw the amusement and smugness in her eyes.
Before Adam could exit the room after Kiara stepped outside, Preston spoke again, halting his movements.
“I hope one day you realize how imbecilic you’ve been. When you do, you better have an award-winning apology ready to give to Case or I will personally kick your ass.”
With that last exchange, Adam left the room without another glance back. I released the kids from the small headlocks I had them in to muffle the fight that took place.
They both gave me hugs and I smoothed their hair and rubbed their backs, trying to comfort them.
“She won’t ever hurt you guys. I won’t ever let her touch you.” I murmured into Cali’s hair as I gave them both small kisses on top of their heads.
A few hours later, I was discharged from the hospital and I went home with the Jones to their house. I had school the next day. It’d be hard to explain why I looked like I had just been hit by a bus but I couldn't afford to miss another day of school. The good news was that my first class didn’t start until the afternoon so that gave me time to rest at the Jones’.
I doubted that Adam would be coming home tonight after what happened in the hospital and I was relieved. No matter how much of an asshole he was being, he still wore the face of the man I once loved, and I can’t disregard that. Even though I knew it wasn’t my Adam anymore, it still hurts.
I laid awake that night, feeling my exhaustion catching up with me but not entirely ready to slip into a deep sleep. I looked at the ceiling of the room, wondering if there will come a time when Adam will remember me properly again. I felt frustrated at myself for hitting him that one time when he was already starting to remember. Maybe if I didn’t hit his head so hard the second time, he’d remember by now and maybe I would’ve had him back.
I groaned in frustration, this wasn’t helping at all. It was like I was feeding myself too much hope and when things doesn’t turn out the way I want them to, I'll get slammed back down into reality. I have to get my head out of the clouds and face the current reality as it was. Adam didn't love me anymore. He loved Kiara the witch.
I stretched my arm out, feeling the scream of my sore muscles. I wrapped my fingers around the pillow above my head. And pulled it down I pressed it against my face and used it to muffle my screams which turned into sobs.
God, look at me. Pathetically crying over some guy. Bryant would be ashamed―right after he beat Adam up for breaking my heart. This wasn't the Casey he left behind. I’ve let Bryant go, I think at some point during my time with Adam, I’ve accepted the fact that Bryant was in a better place. I believed he was happy up there. I believed Adam was right when he said Bryant probably couldn’t think of a more honorable way of dying than to save the little sister that he loved so much.
Along the way, I figured out that I could live with that as long as that was how I remembered things to be. As long as I believed that Bryant was happy in Heaven. I’ve lived the past few years seeing Bryant’s death as such a sorrowful thing. Seeing my parents’ devastated state after his death, facing Maddison’s spiteful words and seeing all the ugly looks people gave me when they found out what happened and why the crash happened. Adam helped me realize that Bryant’s death made way for his soul to move on to a better place, a much less corrupt place. I couldn’t have reached that state of peace without Adam and I owe him greatly for that.
I have half a mind to blame all these tears on hormones but I couldn't deny that deep inside I was still upset about what Adam had been doing. Maybe it wouldn’t be this bad if it wasn’t Kiara he was with right now. Her being the other girl, if you could even call her that, made everything seem 10x worse.
I was jealous; although I didn’t want to admit or show it. There was this delirious side of me that believed that one day Adam would come back whole to me again. That he’ll leave the wench and regain his memories of us and come back to me.
It took me all this time to finally realize that it wasn’t healthy. The old me wouldn’t even count on the thought but I guess a lot has changed since Adam walked into my life.
I needed to let go of the hope that he’s going to regain his memories and come back to me because each passing day that he failed to do so felt like a lash to me. I was tattered and in pieces and I didn't think I could withstand another week of hoping.
A soft knock came from the door and I turned my head to look at the door at my right, trying not to move any other limb on my body since everything else was still sore. The door opened and a small crack of light from the hallway broke its way through the darkness. When I saw who it was, I shifted my head back to its original position and continued to stare at the ceiling.
“How are you feeling?” Adam asked. I wanted to shrug but decided against it.
“I thought you weren’t going to come home tonight.” I stated instead and I saw him shrug in the corner of my vision.
“I didn’t think so too,” he sighed out. I felt the bed dip slightly by the side of my foot, making me glance at him. I could tell that he was keeping his distance and I was grateful for that. Here I was, thinking about letting go of the hope I was feeling and then he sweeps in, re-sparking that hope again; how pathetic.
I guess I wasn’t being very welcoming towards him because he continued on, trying to justify his presence.
“I don’t know why I came here. I started remembering fragments of my past, including you. A few days ago, I started remembering less and less but I just don’t want the flashbacks to stop. I don’t want to forget about anything.” Adam sounded frustrated and I felt the ice in my heart melt.
“Please just help me remember,” I could hear the desperation in his voice. I tried to hoist myself into a sitting position to look at him properly. I propped myself up against the pillows and looked at Adam in the eye.
“What do you want to know?” I asked. I wanted him to remember so I might as well help with the process.
“I keep having this flashback. We were laying down on this ground covered mat, just talking. The sky was covered with millions of stars that night. I remembered a small campfire burning beside us. We were eating marshmallows, but I couldn’t remember why we were there. We were clearly in a forest but I didn’t remember building any tent.”
I could only remember one camping trip that I went on with Adam.
“We came up to the mountains to have a camping trip. We did build two tents. You brought me up there to ask me out,” I stated. We fell to an awkward silence after he processed the last thing I said.
Maybe I shouldn’t have mentioned that last part.
But a part of me did want him to remember.
“Can I ask you something?” I asked him hesitantly after a few minutes of debating over it. Adam looked at me briefly before nodding, rubbing his eyes with his thumb.
“Why don’t you trust me about Kiara? What gave you the impression that I was the type of girl to lie out of jealousy and possessiveness?” I asked, not bothering to mask any of my emotions. I was too tired to cover up what I was feeling.
After a few moments of silence, Adam shook his head, stood up and left. That was all it took for the strings in me to snap.
He simply didn’t care enough to think about those questions. I thought brokenly.
With that thought, I felt one last tug in my heart as I willed myself to let go of that hope. Adam was never going to come back to me and fell into a deep sleep.