Chapter Ten

Cale strode out of the back door, intending to make one more sweep of the area before dinner. He couldn’t rule out Lansing’s mob tailing them from their latest mission, the one that had left Dillon wounded but alive. The same wasn’t true for two of the men they sought. If their information proved correct, three more survived simply because they weren’t where they were supposed to be that night. It made for a dangerous and often shitty outcome. Half-done got him and his team killed. Lansing wasn’t the kind of man to let bygones be bygones. Best he could figure, their hasty travel bought them time, perhaps a couple of days or more. But Lansing would come gunning for them, and soon. Before then, Dillon needed to recover more. Cale also had to find a way to protect Lily on the off-chance someone linked her with them. Nothing stood in the way of what that bastard wanted. Fodder. Lansing considered them cannon fodder.

Shaking his head to push out those morbid thoughts, he surveyed the pastures. Cattle rested and chewed their cud, content as if they hadn’t a worry in the world. Who knew what a cow thought, but these particular ones probably didn’t have many stressors. Food, water, shelter, and several lady friends for Hard Head. A simple life. For a cow.

After lunch, Cale had hauled his brother into the bath for another soaking of that wound, while Lily had cleaned the kitchen and set food out for the dinner she planned to fix later. Then she’d taken a quick shower, finishing in plenty of time to re-dress Dillon’s leg and attach another antibiotic to his IV. She’d barely eaten any lunch, citing not being hungry, even as both he and Dillon had cleaned their plates, appreciative of the fresh, hot meal. Her gaze kept darting to him as if she recalled what had occurred and now wasn’t sure how she felt about their interaction.

His thoughts meandered back to Lily and the chaste kiss they’d shared earlier. Whatever had possessed him to seal his lips over hers, to get a small taste of her essence? Truth be told, the shadowed, hollow sadness in her eyes had twisted something deep in his gut, especially when his flippant words had caused such pain. It moved him to offer comfort in a small gesture that felt right. Boy, did it feel right. He couldn’t claim naivety, and over the years had kissed more women than he cared to recall. However, this one touched a part of him he’d thought dead and gone when he’d walked in and found his wife with another man. Lily made him want to care again, to laugh at her silliness, and to spend that all-important Thanksgiving dinner with her for no other reason than it would make them both happy.

She was different from other women he had been with. More pure. Fairly innocent, too, if he didn’t miss his guess. In his world, that was as rare as a blue diamond laying in the middle of a pasture. But it was more than that. Down to earth and common as the day was long. One of his father’s favorite phrases popped into his head. Lily could fit the bill. Heck, his parents would adore her.

What in the hell am I thinking? Introducing her to his parents? That meant a long-term relationship. Something he’d vowed to never enter into again. Betrayal was an excellent teacher. Hell, if she was as innocent as he thought, he really should keep his hands to himself. No sense in leading her on, sleeping with her, then riding off to his next assignment, leaving her like an astronaut left the earth with the possibility of never returning. Lily deserved better—a committed husband to stand beside her and together raise a family. To give her the simple farm life she longed for.

He couldn’t be that man. Wouldn’t be that man. His life revolved around the Wind Warriors, fighting the baddest of the bad behind the scenes and in the dark. Only a handful of people knowing of their existence. Men he would give his life for, as they would for him. They thrived on adrenaline and challenge, constant change and seclusion. That was his career and sole focus now and would continue to be.

Wives and children were a cherished novelty and as uncommon as a flood in the Sahara Desert. Their work, though necessary, often claimed their lives and their sanity. Hardened veterans, they saw and lived through too many waking nightmares for any of them to retire to polite society. A normal job would never do for any of them.

All former military, they could return to those ranks if they were desperate enough and decided to swallow their independence and abilities in order to be puppets to whichever commander they would be stuck under. But in Wind Warriors they could excel, having the clearance to do what they thought best with no questions asked. A flexibility that most men craved, a paycheck to compensate for all the inconveniences and hazard pay, along with access to all the newest and greatest weapons produced across the world.

What else could a man ask for?

Lily.

The kind of woman a man would give anything to come home to, stand in her arms, and soak up all the love and comfort she could provide. To spend the rest of their lives knowing that love did exist and they could share decades of exploring that love, reveling in it, and passing it on for future generations to be a part of.

The woman he couldn’t have and the dream that couldn’t come true. Reality told him this, yet his mind grasped for possibilities, tormented him with the magical ‘what if’ questions, giving him fleeting glimpses of a haunting paradise.

Until someone took a bite of that damned apple.

He shook his head at the analogy.

Most likely, he’d leave behind a grieving girlfriend before they could reach a single anniversary owing to the risks of his job. If a bullet didn’t find him, something else might. No lack of danger existed in his day-to-day life. Something he wasn’t ready to share with an innocent like Lily.

How could she be so trusting, so believing, so sweet? Opening her doors to him and Dillon based on a recommendation from her boss. Didn’t she know the world was full of hardened criminals just waiting to prey on the inner goodness of others?

His protective streak flared. He owed Lily and would keep the wolves away from her door. All of them. No one would harm her. He’d tear their damn head off first.

Whoa.

The intensity of the promise startled him as little else could—forcing him to see the naked truth. Somehow, Lily had slipped past his guard in record time, dug deep, and made herself at home. The realization didn’t settle comfortably.

Didn’t I learn anything from that fiasco called a marriage?

With a heavy sigh, Cale trudged toward the house, filled with contradiction and indecision. No matter how much he lectured himself, he couldn’t find an answer for the woman who stuck in his head like superglue.