Chapter 93 - Their Cursed

Remi

Today had started badly and just gotten worse. It hurt that this group of people blindly thought I wasn’t good enough to be the twins’ mate and Luna. Hearing that they wanted to make someone else Luna beside the twins made my stomach squeezed painfully. Judging by Cassius and the twins’ reactions and Gentry’s pitying looks, it wasn’t a happy solution either.

The twins tried to comfort me after the meeting, but it was futile. I wanted to believe Calder that he wasn’t going to allow them to interfere, but I had this bad feeling in the pit of my stomach about it all. I didn’t care about being Luna; all I cared about was being with Calder and Cullen. I knew in order to do that properly, I would need to be their Luna, though.

I sat in an armchair in the library, staring at the book in my lap. This one was more of a textbook about different races that inhabited the Supernatural Realm. It was hard to focus on the pages in front of me. All I could think about was the meeting. I hated that I made my mates' lives more difficult. I never wanted any of that. This feeling of defeat was settling inside me. It wasn’t long ago that I was a nobody waitress who kept to herself.

“Hey,” a soft voice stirred me from my spiraling mind. I looked up to see Carson standing in front of me with his backpack slung over his shoulder.

“Hi,” I greeted him. I forced a slight smile on my face. My problems weren’t his.

“You can drop the fake smile,” he said. He gave me a knowing look. “I heard Gentry talking to Calder. I guess you got lacerated by the Elder Council this morning?” I just nodded. He let out a sigh before flopping down in the armchair next to mine, his backpack tossed aside. He plucked the book from my hands and looked at it curiously.

“If I know anything about my brothers, they aren’t going to let the Council’s shit slide,” he said after peering at the book for a few minutes. He said it casually and didn’t even look at me.

“What if they have no choice?” I asked quietly.

“Over the last few Alpha regimes, the Council has grown to exceed their power. They think they have way more power than they actually do. Weak Alphas have let them have too much influence leading to this bullshit,” he explained. “Calder and Cullen respect them as knowledgeable advisors, but they also don’t cater to their whims.”

“I’ve just made everything so much harder for them….” I said, dropping my face into my hands.

“Do you think you’re worth it?” I stilled at his question. Did I think I was worth all this trouble? Deep down, probably not. I am not particularly special for any reason other than this curse that resulted in everything my parents did. Carson didn’t speak for a minute. Finally, I heard him set the book down on the table near us.

“My brothers are assholes. At least they are to me. But they are damn good at being Alpha and running the business. I haven’t seen anything more than a polite smile on Calder’s face in years. Cullen just scowled at every one since he broke up with his high school girlfriend. That changed when you showed up. They are different and happy. They smile every time they see you. For what it’s worth, I think you are worth it to them.” I tried to absorb his words. They lessened the hurt but couldn’t fully erase it.

I lifted my head and looked at Carson. I couldn’t quite pinpoint the look on his face. “Thanks, Carson,” I said. “You know I am still going to stop the whole Maya thing, right?” He nodded.

“I know. Because you’re a good person Remi and if the Elder Council can’t figure that out, then they are all blind,” he gave me a small smile.

“Carson, why have you changed your mind about me? You were even telling your friends that I am just an annoying brat before,” I questioned.

He pursed his lips for a second and looked away from me before standing up and grabbing his backpack. “I was too quick to judge you. I was also pushing my problems off onto you, and that wasn’t really fair if I am being honest.” He picked up my book and handed it back to me. Before he left, he continued, “I know my mom is training you to be Luna, but if you ever need help or just to play hooky, you can call me. I’m not as dumb as my brothers like to think.” I looked at the book he was handing me and noticed there was a scrap of paper with a phone number scribbled on it. I gave him a small smile as he turned and left me in the library.

-

I hid in the library until I had no choice but to head to dinner. I left the books neatly piled on the table, and the librarian said she would leave them there for me. I wasn’t sure what to expect after dinner and didn’t want to bring them with me.

As I headed toward the dining room, my phone rang. I answered it quickly, slowing my pace. “Hello?”

“Good Evening, Remi. It’s Doctor Charles,” said the gentle voice over the phone.

“Hi. It's nice to hear from you,” I told him.

“Well, it's only going to get better. I got your test results back and figured I would give you a call,” he said happily. I stopped in my tracks.

“Does that mean….”

“Yes, Remi. I haven’t found any reason that you will not be able to conceive and carry a pup. You are actually incredibly fertile, but I would take a guess that is due to who you are mated with. It seems you will be able to have as many children as you and your mates would like.” My heart began to race in my chest, and relief pulsed through me. I could give them children. This hadn’t been brought up by any of the Elders but now it also couldn’t be used against me.

“Thank you so much, Doctor Charles,” I thanked him. This chance phone call had just made everything so much better, and I couldn’t wait to tell Calder and Cullen.

“Your birth control is beginning to wear off quicker than you expected it to. More than likely, this is due to all the changes to your body recently. If you would like something, I would be happy to help. I would just need you to come by the office,” he offered.

“I will think about it. I should tell Calder and Cullen the news,” I told him.

“I understand. I will let you go. Congratulations, Remi,” he said.

“Thank you so much. It means so much,” I told him.

After we hung up, I hurried to dinner, figuring out how best to tell the twins. I didn’t want just to blurt it out, but I wanted to tell them soon. I wasn’t ready to be a mom just yet, and we had the curse to break, but there was hope for our future. When I got to the dining room, food was already being served. I maneuvered my way through the busy room over to our table. My heart sank when I only saw Carson, Gentry, and Nicole seated there.

“Remi, there you are. I was worried for a minute,” Nicole smiled at me.

“Sorry, I lost track of time,” I mumbled, sitting down with a seat on either side in case they were running late.

“How were the books? I hope they were helpful,” she continued.

I forced a smile on my face. “Very much. I didn’t realize just how many different races were living here in the Supernatural Realm.” My eyes darted back towards the door to the dining room, willing the twins to walk through it.

“They aren’t coming to dinner,” Gentry linked me. I stiffened, and Nicole’s following words were lost to my ears. “Sorry, Remi.”

I swallowed as I tried to keep my face calm and normal. “Thanks for telling me. I’m going to excuse myself. I’m not that hungry, honestly.”

-

That night, I went to bed alone. And it became the new normal. I would study most days with Luna or in the library. Sometimes, I would help the Luna with pack matters, and she would introduce me to people as the twins’ mate. I caught myself giving a hopeful look to Gentry when he was at dinner, and most often, he would give me a disappointing shake. I would usually go back to the library or our bedroom to wait for them in the evenings. One night, I went up to Cullen’s office but turned around when I heard him shouting from inside his office. When I had tried to go to Calder, he told me he would be upstairs shortly. I fell asleep on the couch in our room, waiting for him. A few times, Pip came and kept me company in the evenings, but it was never the same.

The only solace I got over the next few weeks was waking up every morning with one of them. I started waking up earlier so I could consciously enjoy being with them for the little time that I got. They were seldom in the same place at the same time with me, and it crept up in my mind more than a few times that Carson was right. I really didn't want him to be right, even though I knew eventually we wouldn't be able to spend as much time together as we were.

Calli only made the whole situation worse. While I tried to be patient and understanding that they were busy, all she did was mope around that they weren't paying attention to us. I think this also had something to do with her wanting to mark our mates.

Cullen seemed more resigned and unaffected by the shift in our dynamic than Calder was. Cullen never made promises of coming to find me or being with me shortly. Instead, before he ran off to take care of things, he would kiss me on the forehead and tell me to be good while he was gone. Calder at least seemed remorseful when he would wake up with me in the morning.

The worst day yet was one Sunday morning that I woke up hopeful to at least get them to myself for a couple of hours only to find a note on the nightstand that they had to visit one of the Alphas of a pack that would be joining Blue Moon. That night, they hadn't gotten home until dinner time and were immediately pulled into their father's office.

After about three weeks of this new pattern, I still hadn't been able to tell the twins that I would, in fact, be able to give them a baby. The looks of pity that I continually got from Carson and Gentry were doing nothing to stop the constant sinking feeling in my stomach. Finally, I called Dr. Charles back and asked him for some birth control. Pip went with me, and Dr. Charles gave me some pills instead of a shot. He told me that the human birth control I was on was only semi-effective for werewolves, and these would be more effective in preventing my heat. He did warn me that my first heat may grow more intense the longer I push it off. The longer this went on, the less I was sure about anything.

The only distraction that helped any was immersing myself in all things to do with werewolves. I tried to learn everything I could werewolf culture, history, laws, and everything in between. Part of me was determined to prove to the Council that I wasn't incompetent or naive for my mates. But this determination was slowly being chipped away without them.

Pip and I sat on the front porch of the packhouse, sipping from mugs of warm cider. I absently stared out across the pack lawn that now had a dusting of frost covering it. “I'm sure they miss you,” Pip said, trying to cheer me up.

“Yeah, I know,” I told her despondently.

“Have you told them that you missed them? Have you asked them to just take a minute for you?” When I didn't answer, she understood. “It's not selfish to tell your mates that you need them.”

“I'm sure things will slow down soon,” I mused. I didn't honestly believe it in my heart, but I couldn't admit that to Pip. At least she had been around when she wasn’t working with her mom at the pack daycare.

“Remi, go up to their office and tell them. You're clearly not okay. With the way Gentry has been acting, I can't tell if he's more worried about you or his mate.”

I sighed. Pip didn't understand just how much I wanted one afternoon with them. All their attention and companionship had spoiled me. I didn't want to go back to being alone, especially when they were right here.

“Just go upstairs, knock on their door, and tell them to put work away for a minute,” she coaxed. Calli agreed with Pip and wanted to go to our mates. A tiny blossom of resolve bloomed in my gut. It wasn’t too much to ask for an hour of their time, right? I looked at Pip and gave her a small smile. Then, without a word, she grabbed my mug from my hands. I stood up and opened the front door of the packhouse before I could talk myself out of it.

When I got upstairs, I decided to try Calder because he had been more sensitive to the situation so far. I knocked on the door but didn’t hear anything on the other side for a minute. I nervously opened it, peeking around it to see inside. Calder was lying on his back on the couch to the side, holding a tablet above his head. He had a stylus in his hand, and he was marking something on the screen as he scrolled through it. I stood there watching him for a moment before I made a sound. I cleared my throat softly, but it got his attention. He turned with a look of surprise.

“Remi, baby, what’s wrong?” he asked.

I shook my head and came all the way into the room, closing the door behind me. “Nothing,” I lied. Calder sat up and set the tablet next to him on the couch. I stood there wringing my hands nervously, not sure if he wanted me in his office or not. Suddenly, my resolve was gone, and this plan didn’t seem feasible.

“Come here,” he said, opening his arms to me. I tried not to let on to the excitement that shot through me as I quickly shuffled over to him, climbing onto his lap and into his arms immediately. He pulled me tight to his chest, hugging me for a moment. When we broke apart, his hands came to my face, and his thumbs gently stroked my cheeks. “What’s wrong?” he asked.

“I was hoping you could take a small break….” I whispered. His face fell at my words.

“I’m sorry, but I am on a tight deadline,” he said. His thumbs continued to stroke my cheeks. Unfortunately, the pleasurable contact did nothing to stop the misting in my eyes. “I’m really sorry, baby. Why don’t you go see Pip? I’m sure she could use some help over at the daycare.”

I managed to give him a small smile. “Sure,” I said, somehow keeping my voice level. He didn’t realize Pip was coming to check on me almost every other day now, even if it was just during her lunch break.

Calder pulled my face close, kissing me softly but too briefly. “I’ll try and come to dinner tonight,” he said. I took it as my cue to let him go back to work. I gave him a tight smile and climbed off his lap. Before I walked out the door, he had the tablet back in his hand and was again absorbed in work.