CHAPTER TWENTY-FIVE

Christmas Eve Reprieve.

Veronica woke with a start, causing Lulu to jump up and woof. The poor girl probably needed an outdoor break.

“I’m sorry,” Veronica said, her thoughts disoriented. She’d dreamed about Josh and Jay walking in the snow. She tried to call out to them, but they couldn’t hear her. Just a dream, a sweet moment in her sleep. Were they saying goodbye to her, letting her go, the same as she had to let them go?

After washing her face, she threw on her clothes and dug through her tote for a brush and some mints. Maybe a little lipstick. Then she sprayed some perfume from a sample she kept in her purse. “There.”

Lulu danced with impatience but held her bladder. Veronica checked the time. Six in the morning. Too early, but she’d stay awake now. The smell of coffee drifting up from downstairs convinced her of that.

She should have known she’d find Cullen in the kitchen. He stood with a cup of coffee in his hand, offering it to her when she entered.

“Thanks,” she said, noting how delicious he looked in the early morning soft sunshine, his dark hair tousled, and that little bit of beard shadow ever present. “I’ll take this to go, because Lulu has to go.”

“Then I’ll go with you,” he mimicked.

He grabbed a jacket and the scarf she’d given him, making her think he’d already been on a walk. “When we get back, I’ll make you an omelet.”

“I love it when you talk breakfast,” she said, smiling over at him.

They went out the kitchen door where a long porch showed off the lake and woods. “I wish I could get a picture,” she said, the cold air taking her breath away.

“I took some earlier.” He sipped his coffee and looked out at the snow-covered land. “It really is beautiful.”

She nodded. “I didn’t know how much this place would come to mean to me. I didn’t come to camp here much. I usually had summer jobs so I could buy school clothes for the next year.”

“I think we can make up for that,” he said, guiding her down the steps.

Lulu woofed, ran ahead, and turned to look back at them.

They came to an overlook where a rock wall offered a place to stop and enjoy the scenery. Cullen took their half-empty coffee cups and set them on the narrow wall.

Then he turned to her and pulled her into his arms. “How did you sleep?”

“Okay.” She shrugged. “I dreamed of them, Cullen.”

“Josh and your son?”

She nodded and stared out at the lake. “It was so real.” Explaining the dream, she shook her head. “Today’s the day. I dread it every year.”

Cullen took her hands in his, his gaze washing over her. “Veronica, don’t feel guilty. You and I have a lot to sort out, I know. I promise I won’t push you toward something you’re not ready for.”

“Thank you.” She wiped at her cold cheeks. “In a way, that dream calmed me. It’s as if they were letting me know they’re okay. It’s comforting, seeing them laughing together.”

He drew back and touched her hair. “And I love seeing you and Elle laughing together.”

“She approves of you, Cullen. Thank you again for getting them here.”

“I gave them some logistics,” he said with a shrug. “Chase talked her into the rest.”

Veronica pulled away and grabbed her coffee but stayed close. “She and I had a good talk about . . . Josh and Jay. She misses them so much, and so do I, of course.”

“Of course.”

Lulu woofed at a freezing squirrel and took off.

Cullen kept his eyes on Veronica. “Is that the real reason you couldn’t trust me?”

“What? My husband and son? That has nothing to do with me not trusting, Cullen. It has a lot to do with why I’m hesitant, though. My heart has been battered, bruised, broken, shattered. But I had Elle. Then she went back to school, and I had no one. No one. I treated my daughter horribly, not even realizing what I’d done. I thought she’d pulled away from me, but I kept pushing everyone away. I won’t go through that again.”

“And yet, you were pushing me away at every turn.”

“Before . . . Cullen.”

“Before what? A kiss, a touch, a longing?”

She waved her hand in a circle that included him. “All of that.”

“So maybe,” he said, inching closer. “You were using my unknown reasons for being here to hide the real reason you kept pushing me away. You can’t trust yourself to let go and love again.”

“Duh,” she said with a drawl to shield the dart of pain hitting her in the heart. “You’ve finally figured me out.” Shaking snow off her boots, she added, “Of course, I’m scared. I’m terrified. You’re new territory, interesting but rugged and hard to explore.”

“Do you want to . . . explore me? Because I kept thinking of coming back to your room last night.”

“Don’t you know it,” she blurted. “It seems I stumbled across the whole dang package—tall, dark, handsome, mysterious, extremely rich, a do-gooder philanthropist, he cooks, he makes things happen, he kisses so good. So good.” She paused and breathed in the cold air. “There has to be a fault, a flaw, in there somewhere.”

He laughed. “So, rather than accept and explore all of this,”—he moved his hand all around him—“you’d rather hold out for that fault and find all my flaws before you can commit to me. Or so you can’t commit to me.”

“Yes. Yes, that’s right.” She whirled and started down the path. “I have to find my dog.”

“I’m coming with you.”

“Why?”

“Because I like being with you.”

She pivoted back around. “But you just pointed out my flaws.”

“I don’t care about your flaws. I like them too,” he said, stalking toward her. “Besides, you pretty much showed me everything I needed to know when I spotted you beating your steering wheel to death.”

Then he pulled her into his arms again and kissed her, the tastes of mint and coffee merging. Veronica sank against him, his warmth reminding her of how much she’d missed being held in a man’s arms.

When he pulled away, she almost tugged him back. “Cullen Murdock, there is certainly no flaw in the way you kiss me.”

“May I kiss you again?”

She nodded. “Yes, please.”

They kissed their way down to the lake, the crunch of fresh snow marking their tracks. Lulu played in the snow, barked, danced, chased anything that moved, and finally stopped as if she’d just realized things had changed.

Veronica did much the same. She realized things had changed, a lot. She had fallen for Cullen. A free fall that she prayed would land her in a soft place. But it had to be a slow, easy fall—nothing too hurried.

He tugged her back to the lodge, his hand covering hers, their noses red with the chill, their hearts warm for each other.

They found Trudy and Hillman huddled near the window. Lulu rushed to them, barking about her adventure outside.

“Were you two spying on us?” Cullen asked, kicking snow off his boots and onto the sturdy rug.

“No, no,” Hillman said. “We were admiring this winter wonderland.” Then he lifted his chin. “Someone promised omelets and waffles for breakfast.”

“I’ll get right on that,” Cullen said, reluctantly letting go of Veronica’s hand. “I could use a sous chef.”

“I’ll wash up,” she said, smiling like a lovesick schoolgirl. She was lovesick, but she definitely wasn’t a schoolgirl anymore. Could they do this dance before one of them had to bow out?

They’d finished breakfast just before the power went out.

Cullen checked the breakers and came back to report. “It has to be a line down somewhere,” he said to the others.

Hillman rubbed his hands together. “We have firewood and we have matches. We have food—leftovers and sandwiches, at least. Let’s go have some fun.”

Elle and Chase decided to go and play in the snow. Lulu went with them.

Troy and Bethany had slept late. They came strolling in with big smiles on their faces.

“Hello, sleepyheads,” Trudy said with a knowing grin. “Our power is out, but you two light up the room.”

Troy held Bethany’s hand. “I’m going to be a daddy, but then, you all knew that, right?”

“Right,” Hillman said, rushing to shake his hand. “It took all my willpower not to spill the beans.”

Bethany laughed. “I told him all about each of you, and how you helped me through this.”

Troy glanced around, his gaze landing on Cullen. “And I told her my reasons for being away and being so evasive. My boss demands secrecy because business is competitive.”

“He sounds like a tough boss,” Veronica said, exchanging glances with Cullen. “But I’m glad you’re here, Troy. Your wife missed you.”

Troy looked sheepish. “I missed her too. It’s been a lot of stress, but that’s all over. In fact, I’m taking a new position with the company. One that will allow me to be home more.”

Bethany grinned and then got all teary-eyed. “He also explained how he’d been so caught up in work, he forgot some other important things—like his wife and the baby I wanted him to know about.”

“I’m a workaholic, but that will change. Even my boss fussed at me and made me get myself home. Then he gave me a promotion.”

Cullen could feel Veronica’s vivid eyes on him. He shrugged and started gathering firewood.

Hillman said, “Let’s go for a walk and make snow angels.”

Bethany grabbed a muffin and some fruit. “Go ahead. We’ll catch up.”

“Okay then,” Hillman announced. “And when we get back, I’ll make hot chocolate and some more s’mores.”

They all laughed and started gathering their jackets and scarves. “Best idea for the scarves,” Hillman said, dramatically wrapping his gray wool scarf around his neck.

Cullen watched, amazed at this merry band of people he’d only known for a few weeks. He loved them all. He glanced at Veronica. She gave him the Veronica stare. It involved her eyes narrowing in on him and her eyebrows saying, “Well?”

“What?” he asked, hoping for innocence.

“What exactly did you do to Troy? I mean—did you take him out back and give him a good talking-to? Or did you have a come-to-Jesus meeting with him? Or . . . maybe you’re the boss of him?”

“I told you I took care of it,” he said, pushing her out the front door.

“The man looks happy, and so does Bethany. Santa strikes again. Where do you keep the elves?”

“Don’t go to the basement,” he teased.

She slapped at his arm. “We need to play in the snow.”

“Your wish is my command,” he said, meaning it.

He wished he could have her with him for a long time to come, but would she want to be with him after he told her his one last secret? He planned to buy the Cearley house if she’d accept his offer. But now he had one stipulation.

He wanted her to come with the house.

They followed the trail around the lake, the brisk wind sending snow shimmying off the trees and falling on them.

Cullen had to stop and watch the scene. He’d been all over the world, but he always found a way to avoid celebrating Christmas. Not anymore.

“Don’t stand there,” Veronica said, grabbing his hand. “You haven’t made a snow angel yet.”

She fell in the powdered white clearing and moved her arms and legs back and forth. She looked young and carefree, so happy.

Then she waited for him to do the same.

He followed her cue and made a bigger snow angel than she had, close to hers. The others were deep into a snowball fight.

Veronica frowned at him. “Trying to outdo me?”

He laughed. “I don’t think that’s possible.”

Then she sat up and stared into the woods. “I haven’t done this in a while.”

“Are you remembering?”

She nodded, her eyes misty from the cold and from her memories. “Sweet memories. There was a time I couldn’t bring myself to even remember, let along think about them. I think they’ll be happy that I’ve come out of my shell.” He helped her up and they followed the others back toward the lodge. “Nice of you to do that for Troy and Bethany.”

“I want them to have what I didn’t have—stability. When he told me a few months ago he hated leaving her, I knew I had to do something. So I told him I was coming here and that I’d watch out for her.” He shrugged. “The pregnancy made me speed things up so I could get him home.”

“Why not just send him home before?”

“He had to finish negotiating a big project in New York. And he did, but I did have a long talk with him about putting his family first. Don’t worry, I’m going to make up for the trip she missed. Valentine’s Day if she can travel by then.”

“You had me fooled. You really are here for good.”

“One more part of my armor gone,” he said, glancing over at her. “You’ve managed to tear down all my walls.”

“And you’ve managed to shine a glaring light on my grief. Sometimes, too glaring.”

“So I guess we did help each other.”

“More than I can explain,” she said. Then she took off running toward the lodge. “I’m ready for that hot chocolate.”

Trudy and Veronica got out the leftovers and anything else they could find in the refrigerator. Trudy took the graham crackers, marshmallows, and chocolate bars into the den. They’d found old wire hangers to use for heating the marshmallows.

Veronica held her phone up. She had some messages, and her battery read twenty percent. She saw Mark Callaway’s name.

He’d left her another text: Veronica, I need to talk to you. Call me soon.

Yes, they did need to talk. She’d tell him she didn’t need any more information on Cullen. When her phone kept dropping her calls to Mark, she hurried to find Elle. “I need to borrow your cell phone.”

“Go ahead, but it’s not working very well,” Elle said from her spot by the Christmas tree. She was working on stringing popcorn they’d managed to pop in an old covered cooking pot over the fire.

“Mine either,” Veronica said, frantic now. “And my battery is dying.”

“Is everything okay, Mom?”

“Nothing for you to worry about. I’ll explain later,” Veronica said, glancing around.

Veronica sat down on the stairs after trying every corner of the lodge. She even went out on the bitter-cold North balcony and held her phone up in the air.

Mark couldn’t run a news article on Cullen. He’d promised he wouldn’t. So why would he be calling?

Cullen stood watching Troy and Bethany huddled close out on the back deck. Really, he owed Troy more than a raise. His right-hand man, and the best property scout he’d ever hired, Troy hadn’t grown up in Hidden Mountain, but he sure loved this town. He also knew all the gossip around town, since he had friends who kept him up about the latest.

And while Troy hadn’t repeated anything scandalous, he had mentioned certain people, some of whom Cullen remembered. Then Cullen had asked certain questions. He hadn’t involved Troy in any of this. Troy had only asked Cullen to check up on his wife.

But just as Veronica had changed Cullen, so had Bethany, and Trudy, and his old mentor, Hillman.

He regretted his actions had caused trouble in Troy’s marriage. When Cullen thought of his own mother, alone and drinking every day, he felt ashamed he’d kept Troy away, working on what had seemed urgent projects.

But he’d fixed that, and he’d done it without spoiling the baby surprise for Bethany. He’d tried to fix his mother and his grandmother, and he’d failed. Now he might fail at the one project that had turned from something to bring in more money to one that had brought him back to life.

In the town he’d sworn he’d never return to again.

God also had a sense of irony in his missives.

“We need to talk,” Veronica said as she came up beside him, her green eyes snapping fire.

“Yes, we do.” He turned to stare at her, trying to drink her in while he remembered earlier when they’d taken their morning walk. But first, he had to tell her about the Cearley house. “Is the Christmas truce over, then?”

She looked at him, studying him as if to find the answers that held them apart. “It might be. You go first.”

“You came to me to talk, and it looks as if you have something on your mind. What’s wrong?”

She motioned for him to follow her outside.

He watched as she hurried out onto the front porch, wondering what she’d found to put between them now.