CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO

No More Secrets.

Veronica couldn’t believe this. Elle had found the sign. Now that the truth was out, why hadn’t she told her daughter every little thing, all her angst and pain and grief?

What had she been thinking? She couldn’t blame Cullen for withholding. She’d done the same thing, and they’d both had good intentions and strong motives. But did that make it right?

After an hour had gone by, she got up and hurried to the office. Cullen and Hillman had been huddled together in there for too long now.

Cullen glanced up from where he sat at the desk and gave her a look that told her nothing but held everything that connected them. “I’ll find a way to get you back to your daughter. Somehow.”

Hillman discreetly left them alone.

She waited, feeling the mood shift. Cullen refused to look into her eyes. “Cullen?”

“I got through to Chase earlier. I told him to get her up the mountain. He has a Jeep, and he can park it near the downed tree. Then they can walk the rest of the way on one of the camp trails to the lodge.”

“In the snow?”

He checked his watch. “They can make it, Veronica. If he can convince Elle. He said she’s pretty upset.”

“You don’t think she’s coming here, and I can’t get to her. I can’t believe I let this happen.”

Cullen didn’t speak. He kept his gaze on Veronica, which made her nervous. She needed to explain to Elle, and she wanted to tell him so many things. She could be asking too much with Cullen. Her expectations had been high and now she had to face reality. She’d withheld a part of herself too. From him, from everyone she’d once been close to, and she’d hurt her daughter again.

“Cullen?”

He stood and folded his arms over his chest. “I saw Mark Calloway’s name and number in your phone.”

Well, could this night get any worse? She had given him her phone and he’d scrolled through her contacts with her standing right there. “Yes, we’re still friends.”

“The kind of friends who do favors for each other?”

“What are you asking me, Cullen? It’s a call from a friend. Two calls, to be exact, and you shouldn’t have been snooping.”

“Exactly,” he said, pointing to her. “I also saw a text from him. He wants you to call him ASAP.”

“I might go back to work at the paper.”

“Yes, and that could be great. But I need you to level with me, Veronica. The way I poured my heart out to you.”

She faced him, held her head high, and said, “Okay, I had my friend at the paper vet you, because I had to be sure.”

“Sure of what? Me? My background? I told you most of that. What did you find? Why didn’t you believe me?”

The steel behind his questions should have warned her, but she plunged ahead. “I found what you’d already told me, yes. You do own the lodge and you haven’t decided what to do with it yet.”

“Anything else?”

She was about to tell him that she and the others now knew who he was, but someone called out, “Veronica, you and Cullen get in here.”

“Maybe they’ve heard from Elle,” she said, hurrying out of the room, Cullen behind her.

“What’s going on?” Cullen asked, the throb of a headache making him wish he’d reconsidered this whole plan. The woman he’d become involved with had gone behind his back, even after he’d told her some of his closely held secrets.

Talk about not trusting someone.

But then, he hadn’t been completely honest with her either. He’d made an offer for her house, the house she was now having doubts about selling.

Either they were perfect for each other, or they needed to end things now.

“We want to decorate the tree,” Hillman said, giving him a look that told him he needed to calm down. He’d confided in his friend about finding the reporter’s name in Veronica’s phone.

Hillman had suggested he let it go, since Cullen hadn’t exactly been honest either. “You don’t know why she called him, or why he called her. Maybe they were discussing her returning to work.”

Cullen wanted to believe that, but he couldn’t get past the hurt. It burned through his system like a fuse to his past, making him wonder if he’d ever be enough for any woman. That question had caused him to love ’em and leave ’em so many times before he got hurt.

But could he do that this time, with this woman?

Now everyone stood in expectation. An expectation he’d created. He’d brought them here to keep him company and they’d done that. Glancing around, he took a deep breath.

“The tree?” Relief showed on Veronica’s face. She watched him, her eyes imploring. “Yes, that will take my mind off Elle.”

Worried about her daughter, it didn’t seem she was that concerned about his feelings right now.

“Good idea,” he said. “Let’s see what we can do.”

“Any word from Elle?” Trudy asked.

Veronica glanced at Cullen, her feelings spilling over in her pinched smile. “Chase is trying to get them here. They plan to drive as far as they can, then walk one of the trails.”

“In this weather?”

She nodded. “It wasn’t my idea, but I hope they make it.”

“Well,” she said to Cullen after he’d hung one of the ornaments they’d found in the attic. “You got what you wanted. You won’t be alone on Christmas.”

Hillman had turned on a radio to a holiday station. Christmas music filled the night.

“Yes, because I do control the weather, after all.”

“You’re angry.”

“I was,” he said. “But I did vet everyone I invited to this crazy club.”

“Except me,” she replied, her fingers moving over a handmade bright-red ornament that had the word peace embroidered on it in white. “I’m the interloper here, Cullen. If it’s any comfort, I regretted calling Mark. He did find out a couple of things that you never told me.”

Cullen finished hanging a toy train on the big, fresh-smelling spruce tree. “And what was that?”

“Your real name,” she replied. “Hillman knew it already, though, didn’t he?”

Cullen stood back from the tree. Hillman and Trudy were going through the box of decorations they’d found like two kids with a treasure chest. Trudy lifted a felt snowman with a bright carrot nose.

“He figured it out the first night.”

“Trudy knows now. She remembers you from juvenile court.”

Things were getting ahead of him. “And Bethany?”

Veronica placed a miniature sled on a branch. “Bethany only wants her husband home.”

His phone buzzed. He held up a finger. “It’s Chase.”

Veronica stood silent, her hands tented against her chin.

“Okay. Be careful. Follow the open trail.”

He ended the call. “They’re on their way.”

“What?” Veronica’s shock only fueled his need to do something right, something good, to make up for all the bad he’d been through for so long.

“They parked the Jeep near the downed tree limb and saw the sign for the trailhead. Elle is familiar with it from coming to camp here, so they’re all bundled up and on their way.”

Veronica nodded, tears misting her eyes. “I owe you yet another thanks, Cullen.”

“You owe me nothing,” he said. Then he walked away.

Veronica waited with nerves jittering and her thoughts all over the place. Cullen was upset, and her daughter’s hurt tore at her heart. Not exactly the best Christmas, but if she could talk to Elle, maybe they’d finally get past all the distance that had pulled them apart. Her daughter had to come first.

When they heard a knock at the door a few minutes later, she exhaled the breath she’d been holding. Elle had come.

Hillman opened the door while Lulu danced around him and barked in glee at seeing Elle and Chase.

They walked in and Elle stood, taking it all in, from the rafters to the fireplace to everyone in the room, her gaze finally settling on her mother.

“Elle,” Veronica said, moving toward them. “I’m so glad you came.”

Elle’s face, rosy from the cold, held a look of regret and disappointment. Her eyes were red-rimmed, and she looked tired, world-weary, broken.

“Elle,” Veronica said again. “Please?”

Her daughter’s gaze moved over the people in the room, stopped on Cullen, then finally landed back on Veronica. Chase stood silent behind her, his hand on the center of her back, Lulu at his feet.

Elle rushed toward Veronica and opened her arms wide, then fell against her. “Why didn’t you let me in on this, Mom?”

Veronica grabbed Elle’s hand and whispered, “Let’s go somewhere and we’ll talk, honey. I promise.”

Elle bobbed her head. Veronica looked up, helpless.

“The office,” Cullen suggested.

She hurried Elle down the hallway and into the big office and shut the door behind them. Then she turned to face her daughter. “I’m so sorry. I was a coward, and I was hurting.”

Elle wiped at her eyes. “Well, you weren’t the only one.”

“I’ve known that all along,” Veronica said. “I didn’t know how to voice it.”

“Here’s your chance,” Elle said. “I trekked through a snowstorm to hear the truth, so you’d better give it to me.”

“I’m so sorry I didn’t stay home,” Veronica said, realizing her daughter had grown up and needed to move on, even if they had tried to make their peace. “I should have checked the weather more.”

“I’m not upset about the weather,” Elle said. “It was kind of romantic, walking through the woods in the snow with Chase.” She sank down on a small plaid couch and stared at Veronica.

Veronica took the chair beside her. “I wanted to explain about selling the house, Elle. But I talked to a realtor and then I got your text about the wedding the same day I found that flyer about these meetings. It all seemed like an indication that I needed to start fresh, away from all the memories, away from the house that never really belonged to me. Then, when we talked, you said you wanted to get married in the backyard. I didn’t want to upset you all over again.”

“And it never occurred to you that I might want to know you’re doing this?” Elle asked. Pushing at her hair, she said, “I know I haven’t been home much, and I didn’t make a lot of effort, but Mom, you’re right. The house is too sad. I couldn’t stand the silence. It’s like all the color in our lives had drained away.”

“And I didn’t encourage you to come home, because I wanted you to have a good life, have some fun, make new friends.”

“Well, I did that. I don’t mind you’re considering selling the house so much. I wish you’d told me before you decided this, and I didn’t have to find a sign hidden behind a table.”

“I didn’t want to ruin our time together,” Veronica said. “I panicked when you said you were coming here before going to Savannah.”

“Obviously.”

Veronica tried again. “Would it help if I was thinking about not selling now, and waiting until after your wedding?”

Elle gave her a frown that turned into a pout, before her face crinkled, and tears ran down her cheeks. “You’d do that for me, Mom?”

Veronica stood and went to her daughter, taking her in her arms the way she’d done when Elle was little. “Of course I’d do that for you. I’m so sorry.”

“I miss them, Mom. Jay and Dad. I stayed away because I missed them, not so much because of you. I’m sorry. I should have come home more, to help you, to be with you.”

“Honey,” Veronica said, tugging Elle into her arms. “We both were in such pain. I was horrible and self-centered and just broken. And you were feeling the same, I’m sure.”

Wiping at her eyes, Veronica sat back and looked at Elle. “My friends started dropping off, one by one. They didn’t know how to handle such a deep grief. I blamed them, hated them, missed them. But it was mostly me, staying away from the world. It hurt too much to breathe, to smile, to answer questions, and hear platitudes. And to see the pity all around me.”

“I wanted to fall off the Earth,” Elle admitted. “I did, to a certain extent. My friends in college were great, getting me coffee, bringing me books, trying to keep me going. Then I met Chase at a party, and he took one look at me and understood. Chase . . . he saved me, saw right through to my pain.”

Veronica breathed in relief. “So, can you accept my apologies?”

Elle nodded. “Thanks to Chase talking me down. He’s always there to ground me.”

“I’m glad you have him, and I’ll thank him for getting you here safely.”

Elle wiped her tears aside. “I think Cullen is the same way with you. He got us up this mountain, Mom. He wanted you and me to be together. I think . . .I think he’s in love with you.”

Veronica’s heart felt torn, grieving for one man, and longing for another man. “I might be falling for him too. But we have a lot to work through.”

“Don’t push him away,” Elle said. “I tried that with Chase, but he kept coming back.”

“Cullen seems to do that too. He keeps coming back.”

Even when she tried to put up every obstacle to keep them apart. What if she lost him because she couldn’t believe in him?

Elle wiped her eyes and then giggled. “Maybe we’ve both finally met our match.”

Veronica thought about that. “I always believed your dad was my perfect match.”

Elle’s eyes widened, misting over again. “I didn’t mean—”

“I know what you meant,” Veronica said, taking her daughter’s hand. “Your father was a handsome, good man, and a provider, a protector who loved all of us so much. I will love him always, and your brother too.” She wiped at her eyes. “This is . . . different. This is something I never saw coming. I wanted to stay in my safe little bubble and ignore the world while I held to my pain and grief. But this is complicated and compelling. It scares me.” She looked out the open curtains at the snow falling. “Cullen doesn’t make sense, but when I’m with him, everything seems to fall into place.”

Elle took Veronica’s other hand. “Mom, he’s into you. I mean, he’s a hunk and he’s hot, and apparently money is no problem, and he cared enough to call the house and explain things to me. He talked to Chase about how to get us here, and together, they mapped out the best way to do that.” She sighed. “Chase looked like every girl’s dream, hiking up that mountain.”

Then she quickly added, “Of course, I’m capable of hiking anywhere myself. Even in a snowstorm. But it’s nice to have someone who loves me here with me.”

“You are so in love,” Veronica said. “I love seeing you this way.”

Elle got that dreamy look again. “But I felt guilty at first, so I kept making Chase go away. Then I missed him when he did go away.”

“I’ve done the same,” Veronica admitted. “Cullen holds everything inside, and he still has some secrets that need to come out. I think that’s part of what draws me to him. I need answers. You know, I always have to see things clearly. I have to let go of my cynical nature and . . . live again.”

“We can both do that,” Elle said. “And Mom, I’m cool with whatever you want to do with the house, really.”

“Well, I’ve only had one offer, but I won’t know until after Christmas. I want you to be sure.”

“I’m sure,” Elle said. “A new beginning sounds like a great idea—for both of us.”