TWENTY THREE. I Feel You
“It’s been a long time since I’ve seen him seriously dating a woman.”
“When was the last time you saw him really in love with a woman?”
“A long time ago. Years ago. I think they were pretty serious at the time because the woman had been here a few times. Her name was Brittany, if I’m not mistaken. But I haven’t seen her in years. I thought they broke up,” Betty shrugged nonchalantly.
Riley frowned. She wondered why Logan chose her out of all the women he dated. She was not pretty at all compared to all the women he dated. Riley was sure of that. She once thought the reason Logan chose her to bear his child was because she was a naive young girl who was easily seduced by a fancy apartment and a lot of money.
The thought made Riley angry. She gripped the knife tightly and took out her anger by chopping up zucchini.
"Are you done cutting up the zucchini?"
“Yes, I’ve done cutting all the zucchini. But I'm a little dizzy. May I sit down?"
"Of course. Sit on the stool. Cooking is our job, and you shouldn't have to do anything."
Kaella showed her sympathy by gently rubbing Riley's shoulder. "I feel you."
Riley gave a clueless look.
“I once lost my first child. Before I worked here.”
"I'm sorry for your loss. Do you mind if I ask about your child?”
"Of course. It's not a disgrace. I don't think it's a disgrace at all," she said cheerfully.
"Is your baby growing yet?"
"Yes.”
"Boy or girl?"
“A baby boy. It would have been a baby boy had he not died at seven months."
"Oh, God, I'm sorry. You're almost a mother," Riley covered her mouth sympathetically.
“I was seventeen years old at the time. My lover... well, you must know how bad boys live. I was never really serious about studying,” Kaella smiled shyly.
"You married your lover?"
"No. Of course not. He even ran away a second after I told him about my pregnancy. I went through the pregnancy alone. My mom and dad were angry because of my pregnancy. They were disappointed in me and didn't support me at all when I was going through the really tough days of my pregnancy. But I love my baby. I was so happy when I found out that I was pregnant.”
Riley knew it was the truth when Kaella said she loved her baby. The sad streaks on Kaella's face had just turned into happy ones as she started talking about her baby and reminiscing about it.
"My baby was very strong. In the sixth month I felt him kicking many times. Although it hurt sometimes, I was happy. We communicated every day. He was the one who kept me motivated even though my parents hated me."
"Are you an only child?"
"Yes, unfortunately. My parents expected me to be a smart girl and have a good job in the city. However, I ruined myself with my pregnancy. I dropped out of school after five months of pregnancy. I couldn't go to school with a big belly."
Riley knew what she meant. Kaella was treated badly by her friends at school because of her pregnancy. She might have become the butt of her friends' jokes. Especially because her boyfriend was not responsible for her pregnancy.
"What did you do after you decided to quit school?"
Kaella chuckled as she chopped the onions. Riley suspected that she was laughing at her question.
"Nothing. I did nothing but laze around like a pregnant woman. I ate a lot of nutritious food, watched films, read books, occasionally read novels. I pampered myself as best I could."
"Your parents hated you, but they still gave you all those facilities?"
Kaella nodded while sautéing onions.
"I don't think my parents really hated me. They were just disappointed with what I did because I had ruined my future. My parents were the ones who took me to the hospital and held a funeral for my baby when my baby died. My mother comforted me and accompanied me for weeks after I lost my baby."
"So what happened to your baby?"
“I don’t know. The doctor said it could be because my baby’s umbilical cord was tangled, or maybe because of poisoning from something. Well, baby stuff is really complicated. But I really love my baby. So the regret came really hard hit me.”
"I'm sorry for your loss."
"I managed to get through those sad days quite well. After my condition was stable enough, I decided to go to New York and work in this house with Betty. My neighbor who worked as a cleaning service at Mr. Hatcher's office told me about a job vacancy as a maid. I didn't have to think twice about packing up and saying goodbye to my parents because I wanted to find a better life in New York."
"You're great. You rose quickly from adversity."
"I don't see the point in grieving for too long. You're in the middle of your problems now. However, you will definitely find a solution to your problems later."
"Thank you. I know you're a great woman, and I hope I can be as great as you."
Kaella smiled and rubbed Riley's shoulder gently. It felt good to be able to share her sad story with someone who truly understood her position. She had always grieved alone, keeping all her sadness to herself until she felt really fed up because the people around her couldn't understand her position.
“Riley, would you mind taking this food to Mr. Hatcher? He's in the garden doing some stuff."
"Of course. Give me that food."
Betty handed her a tray with a plate of salmon sushi topped with caviar. There were the little bowls of mayonnaise and a dark brown, almost black liquid. Riley smelled the liquid and frowned in disgust when she smelled the thick aroma of soy sauce.
“I have no idea why Logan likes raw fish,” she wrinkled her nose.