Chapter 119
Evelyn's POV
Isabella's smile was sad and knowing. "I suspected from the first time I came here and saw his car in your garage. And that assistant Julia? That was Julian, wasn't it?" She paused, a knowing smile playing at her lips. "On the yacht, the way he looked when he realized you were missing. The way he moved heaven and earth to find you. That's not how he react to someone who's just a business associate."
I stared at her. My mind struggling to process this information. She'd known. All this time. Through every interaction, every polite conversation. She'd known that I was sleeping with the man who was supposed to be protecting her fiancé.
And she'd said nothing.
"Why didn't you say anything?" The question came out hoarse. Confused. "To Adrian, or—"
"Because it's not my place to interfere in other people's relationships," Isabella said simply. "And because, honestly, I'm not sure Adrian would care as much as you think he would. He's too busy trying to figure out how to love me when he's still in love with you."
The words hung in the air between us. Heavy with truth. I wanted to argue. To insist that Adrian had moved on years ago. That whatever we'd had was dead and buried.
But the fever had stolen my ability to lie, even to myself.
"He's not—" I started, then stopped. Because what was the point? She'd seen through all of us. Had looked past the careful performances and polite fictions to the messy reality underneath.
"It's okay," Isabella said. And the kindness in her voice was almost worse than if she'd been angry. "I've made my peace with it. With being second choice. With knowing that no matter how perfect I am, how suitable, how much his family approves—I'll never be you. And honestly?" She laughed, but it was bitter. "I'm tired of trying to be."
Before I could respond, she leaned forward. Her blue eyes intense and focused in a way that made me suddenly aware of the steel beneath her sweet exterior.
"The real reason I came here today," she said quietly, "is because I didn't want you to find out through some society page or gossip column. You deserve to hear it from me directly." She took a breath. "Everything I said earlier—about how much I admire Adrian, how kind he is, how perfect he seems—I wasn't trying to show off or make you jealous. I was trying to explain that I really tried, Evelyn. I gave it everything I had. I tried to love him the way he deserves to be loved. I tried to be what he needs." Her voice wavered slightly. "But it's not working. And I can't keep pretending it is."
She paused, gathering herself before continuing.
"I'm going to break the engagement," she said. Her voice steady and certain.
"I'm going to call it off, publicly and gracefully, in a way that won't damage either family's reputation. But before I do, I need to know something." She paused, studying my face like she was trying to read the truth written in my fever-bright eyes. "Are you still in love with Adrian? Is that why you're pushing Julian away?"
The question should have been easy to answer. Should have been simple, straightforward. A clean yes or no that would let her make whatever decision she needed to make. But nothing about my feelings had been simple since the day I'd walked back into the Winthrop mansion.
"I don't know," I said finally. The words dragged out of me by exhaustion and fever. "I loved him once. Desperately. But that was five years ago, and we're different people now. He's the responsible heir, the perfect son, the man who let his family send me away to protect their reputation. And I'm—" I stopped. Swallowing hard against the lump in my throat. "I'm not the girl he fell in love with anymore. I'm not sure I'm anyone worth loving at all."
"That's not true," Isabella said fiercely. "Julian wouldn't—" She caught herself. Her cheeks flushing slightly. "I mean, from what I've observed, he doesn't strike me as the type to waste his time on someone he doesn't genuinely care about. And the way he looks at you... that's not casual interest, Evelyn. That's the way Adrian used to look at you, before everything got complicated. Like you're the answer to a question he's been asking his whole life."
The comparison hit too close to home. Scraped against wounds that were still too raw to touch. I closed my eyes, fighting back the tears that threatened to spill over. Refusing to break down in front of this woman who was being kinder to me than I had any right to expect.
"It doesn't matter," I said. My voice barely above a whisper. "I pushed him away. I told him he meant nothing. That we were just—" I couldn't finish the sentence. Couldn't force out the cruel words I'd used to drive him away.
"Then you're an idiot." Isabella's bluntness startled me into opening my eyes. She was smiling, but there was no humor in it. "You're an idiot if you think saying something hurtful in a moment of fear means it's over. Do you have any idea how many times I've tried to push Adrian away? How many times I've told myself I should end this engagement because I deserve someone who actually loves me? And yet here I am, still wearing his ring, still playing the perfect fiancée, because I'm too scared to walk away from the safety of being chosen—even if I'm not really chosen at all."
She stood abruptly. Smoothing down her sweater with hands that trembled slightly. "But I'm done being scared. I'm done settling for second place in someone else's story. And you should be too, Evelyn. You should stop running from the one person who actually sees you and wants you anyway. Because trust me—that kind of acceptance? That's rarer than you think."
I wanted to tell her she was wrong. That Julian didn't really see me. That he'd built up some fantasy version of who I could be instead of accepting the monster I actually was. But the words wouldn't come. Stuck behind the memory of him holding me in the yacht's darkness. Of him catching me when I fell. Of him looking at me with eyes that saw every scar and shadow and still chose to stay.
Until I'd driven him away with the same cruelty I'd learned in Vorkuta.