Taking a Test

Famke looked at Nyx after Jubi left the room. “I can’t believe I was so stupid. I’m not some sixteen-year-old kid who doesn’t know better.”

“True.” Nyx didn’t sugarcoat it. “Maybe deep down though you knew the risk and were willing to take it.”

She shot her friend an annoyed glare, “what do you mean?”

“I mean, maybe, you want this. Famke, it’s not like you to be callous with your sexual health. You’ve always been choosy about your partners. The day you asked me to pick up the plan B pill for you, you phrased it with ‘if I had time’ because you were too busy to go get it. Now, you know I would do anything for you, but I also know if it was any partner other than Royal, you would have told your boss you’d be late to work and gone and got the pill yourself. You were only with him a week and I knew you were on the fence about taking it. I brought it to you, but I wasn’t convinced you were going to actually take the pill.”

“You think I did this on purpose?”

“No.” Nyx denied the allegation with a firm shake of her head. “Not ever. I know you too well Famke. I think though you’re of the mind set, if it happens, it happens.” The sound of Royal calling her name made Nyx smile, “he’s a good guy despite all of our original opinions and if there is anyone, I can see you reconsidering your life choices with, it’s him.”

Royal came into the room. “Famke? What’s wrong? Jubi came downstairs and said there was an emergency. Are you hurt?”

“Your sister is insane,” Nyx leapt out of the bathtub with a chuckle. “She didn’t nick an artery for crying out loud.” She kissed Famke’s cheek. “I’ll leave you to talk.”

“What’s wrong?” Nyx was barely out of earshot and Royal was holding the door frame. “Is it the unpacking? You’re having second thoughts? Baby girl, I’ll wait forever. If you’re not ready.”

She gave a snort, “stop. I’m ready. I want to move in with you and Precious. Bram does too. I have no regrets about moving.”

“Oh, thank god,” he slouched against the door. “I mean I’ll wait but I really love sleeping next to you and since we’ve been home from vacation, I hate every night we’re apart.” He moved to stand in front of her and looked down. “What’s the emergency then? What’s wrong, babe?”

She held up the tampons. “I’m late.”

He frowned for a half second and then grinned, “you didn’t notice?”

“You did?” she was surprised by his tone.

“Well yeah. You told me you were like clockwork and were never late. I was expecting ten days ago for you to tell me to back off, but you didn’t. You didn’t seem worried, so I didn’t panic.”

“I can’t believe you knew my cycle better than me.”

“Are you kidding? My every thought is consumed with when I get to fuck you next and if I’m going to be shut down. I’ve been waiting for you to tell me no.”

“What if I’m pregnant?” she whispered quietly.

“Then we’ll figure it out. If you want the pregnancy, great. If you don’t, then I’m okay with it too. Either way, I’m fine.” He squatted in front of her. “Only one way to know though.”

“I need to pick up a test,” she groaned and leaned her head back to stare at the ceiling.

“Or your amazing boyfriend already did because he had a sinking suspicion you were pretty distracted with all the packing up of your life at the other place you weren’t paying attention.” He leaned backwards into the bottom of the three drawers he’d designated as hers. “If you didn’t realize unpacking the feminine hygiene products, the alarm bell would have gone off when you opened this drawer.” He put a blue box in her hand. “I thought knowing sooner rather than later might have been better considering you need to weigh options.”

She twisted her lips, “I’m scared.”

“Me too.”

“You are?”

“Mm,” he stared into her eyes lovingly. “Remember when you and I chatted in the beginning, and you told me the risk of placental abruption increases in each subsequent pregnancy? I may have done a bit of research on the matter. There is an increased risk, and you are far more important to me than anything or anyone else. I think if this test comes out positive, no matter what decisions you make, we need to be really careful.”

She reached her fingers out to trace his beard softly, “how did I get so lucky to have you?”

“I’m the lucky one, Famke.” He pushed the test in her hands and put the tampons on the counter. “Take the test.”

“You’ll wait with me?” she opened it and looked at the instructions nervously.

“Yes. Hell, I’ll hold the stick while you urinate on it, if you need me to. I’m not going anywhere, love.”

She looked back at him and then reached past him to put the box on the counter, sighing quietly. “We need to talk first.”

He knelt back on his heels. “We do?”

“We do.” She confirmed with a nod. “I’ve been thinking about us. You’ve done so much for me and for Bram and for Precious. You’ve been open and transparent and more than patient with us. You moved here to be closer to us, for her sake and it’s such a gift. I love watching you with her. It’s incredible to see the man you are. A while ago, in our standoff with your mom in Black Magic where she said your dad said Prince was manipulative and Jubi was spoiled, and you were a cold bastard, it bothered me.”

“I can be.”

“No. You’re not. You’re warm, loving, kind. Are you blunt and forthright? Yes. Completely. Are you protective of your family and go for the throat when we’re at risk, like you did with Ambrosia? Absolutely. I’d never call you cold though. He’s wrong. Your mom is wrong. You’re not a cold bastard. Look at you right now, Royal. Sitting in front of me, ready to give up the dream of a big family of your own.”

“Whoa, don’t paint me as a hero as if I’m making a kind of sacrifice. I love you Famke and I’d take you a thousand times over a kid.”

“I love you,” she blurted out the words before she could stop herself. She knew her cheeks were bright red as she spurted the words and watched the slow smile grace his face. “I just, if we’re going to check this test together, I just wanted you to know before we did, that I love you no matter the outcome. I’ve never told a man I loved them before and I,” her words were cut off as he lunged at her and covered her mouth with his.

She wound her arms around his neck and held on as he kissed her hungrily. His mouth slipped back and forth over hers as his tongue pushed past her lips. She dug her fingers into his hair as he held her tight.

She giggled as she started to fall backwards, “I’m going to fall into the tub.”

“Nah, I got you,” he pulled her forward as he sat on the floor and adjusted her straddling his hips. “You love me?”

“Very much,” she nodded, her thumb wiping the moisture seeping from the corner of his eye. “I love you Royal. I’ve been scared to say it because I don’t want to jinx anything, but I love you.”

“I love you too,” his voice was raspy as he studied her face.

“I know,” she said with a gentle smile.

He grew serious, “no matter what the test says, I love you. No matter what you decide, I love you.”

“We decide,” she corrected him. “It’s what we decide, Royal. This wouldn’t only be affecting me. We both contributed to the situation. We make this decision together. You don’t get to defer to me on something this important.”

“Your body and your life,”

“Is in both of our hands,” she finished his sentence. “We’ll make informed choices and decisions together.”

He pulled her to his chest and hugged her tight, “I fucking adore you.”

She giggled as she nestled into his arms. “I do need to pee though. It’s good timing. I can’t believe you bought a test.”

“I went for condoms and stood there for about twenty minutes debating. I figured at the least, we’d have tests in case we created any more mishaps.”

“If I’m not pregnant, we need to have a serious discussion about what we want and when. I only recently decided to go back to school in the fall to bolster my credits for college, but this was the second near miss in a couple of months.”

“I know. Let’s solve this one issue at a time. Time for you to pee on a stick.”

She climbed off his lap and sighed, “I may need you to step outside while I do the pee part.”

“I’ll be right on the other side of the door.” He grinned suddenly as he got off the floor, “I’m not a golden showers kind of guy but –”

“Get out!” she laughed as she shoved him out the door and closed it, grateful his playful antics were lightening the mood.

A few minutes later she was washing her hands, and he came back in, looking at the two sticks she set on the countertop. “You did both of them?”

“I’ve only ever taken one test in my life. I don’t know. It seemed better to do both of them.”

“What happens if one is negative and, one is positive?” he leaned against the counter.

“We get a third one?”

She moved to stand between his legs and leaned against his chest as his arms circled her waist. “I think either way, I’ll need to book an appointment with my doctor to get checked. I’ve never been late before except the one time I was pregnant.”

“It’s a good idea. If you’re not, we should discuss better ways of contraception. There are times we’re both too damn frantic to wait.”

“I could try an IUD, not a hormonal one because I don’t think I need it.”

“We’ll talk to your doctor about what is best and safest for you, especially where you’ve experienced issues in childbirth. I want you safe.”

The timer on her phone she’d set rang and they both turned their heads to look at the tests. Negative.

She should have been jumping up and down for joy. Why then did she feel so disappointed?