Chapter 81

Chapter 81
Jordan's POV

I don't remember the ride is to the station. I don't remember what I said to the police, or what they asked me, or how my dad got me out of there and took me home.

Everything after the hospital blurs into the distance, like I'm watching it happen to someone else. All I know is that at some point, I'm back in my room and I haven’t moved. The curtains are half drawn. The light outside has shifted from night to morning and I'm still sitting at the foot of my bed, staring at nothing.

My hands are clean now. I scrubbed them raw in the sink when I got home but I can still feel the blood, warm and slipping through my fingers, not stopping no matter how hard I pressed. My chest tightens.

"If he hadn't gotten involved with you..."

I squeeze my eyes shut. Mr. Ashford's voice loops over and over in my head, louder than anything else, louder than my dad telling me I'm not to blame, louder than my own thoughts.

"He wouldn't be fighting for his life right now."

I press my palms into my eyes until it hurts because it's hard not to see the truth in those words. I am the one who had a past with Vince. I am the reason that psychopath took Kaelen. I am the reason he shot him. I thought I had a choice how I lived my life. That choice ended up hurting the one person I care about most.

A knock sounds on my door before Dad pops his head in. "Jordie..." he exhales. "Did you sit there all night?"

I don't respond because saying it felt better than making myself comfortable while Kaelen suffered will break him. I have broken enough people as is.

"Come on. You need to eat something and rest," he says gently.

I shake my head, "I'm not hungry."

He steps further into the room and joins me on the floor. "Talk to me," he says. "Why--" he hesitates. "How did it come to be with Vince. What happened? The police wouldn't tell me anything."

The question hangs in the air. I swallow tightly, remembering the inevitable conversation I had to have at the station, the same thing I had told Kaelen. But this is my dad.

I should lie. I should say it's complicated and I don't want to talk about it. But my mouth opens before I can stop it. Everything spills from dating Vince in secret, his abuse, the recordings, the manipulation... the way it never really stopped even after I thought it had.

My voice gets worse as I go on, every sentence something being pulled out of me against resistance. My father goes completely still. When I finally finish, there is silence so thick it feels physical. Then he stands up suddenly.

"What?!" he snaps.

I don't look at him. "I didn't tell you because I didn't think it would change anything. I didn't think anyone could actually stop him." My throat tightens. "And because I felt powerless."

He turns away for a second, dragging a hand through his hair. I hear it his breathing shifting, the anger taking over but it's not at me. He is pacing now, furious at himself.

"I let that bastard into my house," he mutters. "I shook his hand, thinking he was your friend while all that time he was assaulting you?" His voice breaks at the end.

"Dad," I call softly. "You didn't know."

"I should have!" he snaps, then stops himself. He looks at me again, and this time there is a broken look in his eyes, near tears. "I'm supposed to protect you, Jordie. And I failed to see what was right in front of my eyes."

That hits harder than anything because I never blamed him. Not once.

"You do, Dad," I say, getting up. "You always have."

He whimpers, trying so hard not to break apart. "Jordie, I---"

"Remi!" A voice cuts through the hallway. Mom. "Get your things. We are leaving right now!"

My head lifts instantly. Hurried footsteps follow before Remi appears at my doorway, his expression tight. "She is forcing me to leave, Dad."

My dad straightens immediately. "I'll talk to her."

"There is nothing to talk about. I'm only here to get my son and leave!" Her voice snaps from the hallway as she steps into view. Her eyes barely flick over me when she starts gathering whatever she thinks is Remi's, moving around my room like it's some kind of dumpsite. "This environment is unacceptable."

She says it like we are some kind of contamination or horrible disease. My Dad moves and tries to stop her. "If Remi doesn't want to leave, he stays right here."

"No, he is not!" she shoots back. "I didn't bring him here to be stuck in the middle of this... nightmare."

"Do you even know what's been happening?" my dad demands. "Do you even have any idea what your other son has been through?" he fires back.

"The only son I have is Remi," she says dismissively. "That one is yours. He is your problem."

I don't know why I let myself get disappointed anymore. She made her choice long ago and I am never going to be in it. Remi looks between them, uncomfortable. "Mom---"

"Get your bag now!" she cuts him off.

He hesitates then looks at me. I nod once to let him know it's okay. He swallows hard, then turns. My dad looks like he wants to argue more but he doesn't.

Minutes later, Remi pauses in front of me. "I'll come back soon, big bro."

I manage a smile, "I'll be right here, little bro."

He gives me a quick hug before stepping away. Then they are gone. Just like that, it's me and my dad again. I sink back onto my bed. Dad joins me and pats my back gently.

"I want you to know that no matter what happens, no matter where you go or how old you get..." he says, his eyes gleaming with tears. "You can always come to me about anything. I love you, Jordie. And I'm so proud of you."

"I know, Dad," I smile then lean into his shoulder, letting him hold me like I am five again.

My phone buzzes beside me. I don't reach for it immediately, afraid it's going to be bad news. It buzzes again. Finally, I grab it. Two messages from Elise. My heart pounds so hard as I open them.

"Hey, J."
"Kaelen is awake. He has been moved to recovery now.”
Everything inside me stops then rushes back all at once. Air floods my lungs so sharply it almost hurts. My vision blurs from staring too hard at the message.
"What? Is everything okay?" Dad asks, sitting up.

"He is awake..." I whisper, not believing my own words. I look at him, my chest heaving. "Kaelen is awake!"