Chapter Forty-Eight

Chapter Forty-Eight
Toshiro leans back in the chair, setting his sheathed katana on the surface of the table so that he can sit comfortably. “I couldn’t tell. Whoever it was cloaked their presence incredibly well. Too well, if you ask me,” He says, seeming rather bothered by the information. His eyes flash as they look back to mine, a mixture of black and burning gold. “Not someone within the Court, I find it safe to assume. You mustn’t wander anywhere without me, do you understand?”

My brow furrows at the request that sounds more like a demand, but try my best to refrain from rebelling against it. Ascian would have said the same thing if he were here, and I would not react the same way if it were him requesting such a thing from me. Ascian placed Toshiro here as my guard for a reason, so I have to at least try and trust that reason, if not Toshiro himself. Arcane groans as she sits behind my chair and begins to groom herself, in desperate need of a bath after her supper.

Realizing that I haven’t answered him, Toshiro tilts his head with a stony look, dark eyes flashing at the movement. “You have to promise me.” He repeats, though his tone remains the same volume as before. He knows that I heard him the first time.

I sigh and raise my hands in front of me. “Okay, fine. I swear I won’t wander off alone. Anyway, whoever it is that was listening to us has some opportune timing. What was it that happened to me? Why did I see that?” The memory and scents start to flood back to me, so I dig my palm into the edge of the table to keep my mind present.

Toshiro’s expression softens a bit, his sharp jaw setting. “That was a vision, though it was a glimpse into the past rather than the present. Even powerful magic wielders are rarely blessed with such gifts. What you witnessed was a version of myself long before Ascian and I met. I was a savage, rogue Kitsune without a purpose. I was angry at those who hurt me and had only the mind to inflict that pain tenfold back onto them. I was not better than a Demon back then,” He admits, his eyes becoming distant and unfocused as he is transported back to the memory that I saw.

I dig my hand into the corner even harder to keep from joining his recollection, unwilling to smell that charred flesh again. “So you went on a rampage and murdered a whole village?” I reiterate, swallowing the spark of rage inside of my throat. He said that it happened a long time ago when he was practically a different person entirely, but it still doesn’t excuse his behavior. He took countless lives because a human treated him poorly? That hardly makes all those living in the same town worthy of burning alive.

Toshiro seems to sense my thoughts, lifting his gaze back to me with a remorseful expression. “I know, it does not justify my actions, but it was more than just some human exchanging hurtful words. They raped and murdered the woman that I loved, leaving her to die on the outskirts of town, just outside of my forest. My rampage was in revenge for her wrongful death.”

My heart drops to my stomach, suddenly feeling like I judged him too harshly at first. He’s right that it doesn’t pardon his slaughter of the village, but at least he had a good reason for losing his mind to the range and grief that overcame him. Someone stole the person he cared about the most and he could never get that back. Ascian has done more damage for less in my name, so how can I be so quick to condemn? I lower my gaze to the table, following the golden grains with my eyes. “I’m sorry for your loss,” Is all that I manage to say, my voice hardly above a whisper.

Toshiro shakes his head, running a hand through his long locks. “It was centuries ago. I am more curious about how you saw that. You’re a human, aren’t you?” He asks, narrowing his eyes at me suspiciously. “You certainly smell like one.”

Feeling mildly offended, I frown at his question. “Of course, I am. I’m just as mystified as you are. Ascian only just started informing me of how magic even works this morning before his departure,” I look down at my ring, suddenly reminded of its residency on my finger. I slide it onto the table between us so Toshiro can see it clearly in the firelight. “This is his ring. Could that have something to do with it?”

Toshiro observes the jewel without touching it, leaning away after a matter of seconds. “That’s doubtful,” He says reaching to touch his chin thoughtfully. “As far as I know, Ascian holds no such abilities, so it would be unlikely that such Sight would suddenly be bestowed upon you by simply wearing an object of his. Besides, it does not seem to be the source of the magic that surrounds you, anyway. It simply serves as a pair of spectacles for you.”

My frown deepens as I pull my hand back into my lap, fiddling with the ring mindlessly. “Then I don’t know what it could be. I’ve never even seen magic until this morning.”

Toshiro seems equally as troubled by the reason behind my sudden Sight abilities, as he named it. His jaw works as he thinks, turning his eyes back to me. His expression brightens as if he’s come up with a possible rational response. It fades quickly though, as he seems to decide it isn’t quite as likely as he had originally hoped.

“What is it?” I pry, leaning forward against the table at the glimmer of conviction he showed, no matter how brief. My eagerness earns me a chilling look, making me realize that the response he concocted might not be what I expected. I sit back in my seat, shoulders slacking again. “What?”

Toshiro reaches to run his graceful fingers over the pattern on his sword hilt as if feeling it beneath his touch brings him a sense of calm. Considering that the katana seems familiar enough to be the same weapon he brandished in the glimpse of his past, it’s safe to assume that he is very acquainted with it. How a sword can possibly last in such excellent condition for hundreds of years is beyond me, especially when it's been put to such strenuous use. The thought of the blood dripping from the blade makes me shiver and withdraw from the table, no longer wanting to be remotely close to it.

The Fox seems to notice my recoil and quickly pauses his fiddling, removing his hand from the textured handle. “Nothing plausible,” He says to my nearly forgotten question, pulling his hands in front of him. “It was just a fleeting idea. I know Ascian better than to believe such a ridiculous thought.”

My interest is piqued, successfully drawing it away from the katana. “Yet, here we are without any other ideas. Just tell me, whatever it was,” I probe him, eager for even the hint of a reason for what happened. I will never be able to find sleep if I am left unanswered, even if it’s only a guess. Knowing that the Sight might strike me again at any moment makes me feel uneasy, my gut coiling with the anxiety. Who knows what sort of things I might see next if we don’t discover why it’s happening to me. I don’t even have any magic.

Toshiro reminds resilient to my pestering and folds his arms across his chest, causing a bicep that I haven’t noticed until now to flex beneath his Yukata. I thought that he was rather slender in build, but the fact that I can even notice the movement of a muscle beneath the long sleeves says my assumption was false. My attention doesn’t go unnoticed, but Toshiro doesn’t address it. “No,” He says with finality, dark eyes blazing as they bore into mine. I want to argue and continue to pressure him for any scrap of information, but the sudden pressure that surrounds him makes me think twice about it. Until now, I’ve never noticed the commanding presence that Toshiro has, making me feel suddenly very small and very human sitting near him. No Faerie has the ability to make me shrink, other than Ascian when he is angry. “Stop asking. If I find it might concern you, then I will bring it up. But for now, just go to bed,” He commands, pushing himself away from the table and snatching up his katana with fluidity.

I swallow, feeling the pressure suddenly vanish as he moves away from the table. “Where are you going?” I ask, climbing to my feet.

Toshiro turns to look at me over his shoulder, the black fabric shining like liquid night. It only now occurs to me that it might not be average silk, after all. He grips the sword in one hand as he reaches to unlatch the lock with the other, voicing a low growl that rumbles across the room, stilling my movement. “Out. I will remain close, so don’t worry. Sleep while you can; I’ll be back by the time you wake.”