If I ever think about getting married

If I ever think about getting married
“Do you think you should tell your parents, Car?”
Leon’s voice broke the silence, and the conversation moved on from there. They sat side by side on the bed, their backs against the headboard. Carissa rested her head on his broad shoulder like it was the only place she felt right, her body finally finding a moment of ease.
Her eyes were closed, but her thoughts drifted somewhere else.
She went back to that day, the day she found the courage to speak. The day she told her father and her stepmother what Gentara had been doing to her. A faint smile touched her lips for a second, but there was no warmth in it. The memory still felt too close. She had believed they would protect her. She had believed they would stand by her.
Instead, everything broke apart. Gentara twisted the story until it no longer looked like the truth. He made himself look like the victim, and somehow, they believed him. In the end, Carissa was the one who looked guilty.
From that moment, something inside her gave up. She stopped expecting anything from them because it felt pointless.
“I told them,” Carissa said quietly. “But they did not believe me. He turned everything around and threatened me.”
The memory weighed on her chest, but Leon’s hand moved slowly over her arm, easing the anger that started to rise again.
“Threatened you?” Leon lowered his head to look at her. Carissa gave a small nod, her eyes still closed.
“What did he say, Car?”
She did not answer right away.
The room fell into silence, the kind that made it hard to breathe. When she finally spoke, her voice came out weak and shaking.
“He said he would spread the video.”
That was enough to break her.
Tears slipped from her closed eyes, and she lost control. What started as a quiet cry turned into something deeper, something she could not hold back anymore. Leon pulled her close without thinking, pressing her face against his chest like he wanted to shield her from everything.
His jaw hardened. Every word she said made something in him twist. It felt like he was there, watching it happen, seeing her go through all of it alone.
Gentara was a fucking bastard. If Leon ever saw him, he would not hold back.
“Damn it,” he muttered, the anger slipping out before he could stop it.
He forced himself to breathe and tried to get a grip on it. Then he rested his chin on top of her head and pressed a soft kiss there.
“I am sorry,” he said, his voice low. “I should not have made you remember all that.”
Regret settled deep in his chest. His curiosity had pushed him too far.
He gently held her shoulders and turned her so she faced him. “You are safe now, Car. Try to let it go.”
Carissa gave a small, bitter smile.
Let it go?
If it were that simple, her life would not look like this. The fear she felt around men would not still be there, buried deep inside her.
She lifted her head and looked at him. “Sir, I would not be living like this if forgetting was that simple.”
Leon went quiet for a moment, thinking. Then his hand moved to her face, wiping away the tears clinging to her lashes.
“You might not forget everything,” he said gently. “But you can learn to live with it.”
Carissa’s expression shifted at his words. “Live with the past that made me like this? Live with the past that turned me into a dirty and broken girl?”
Her voice rose at the end, filled with anger and hurt. She hated how easily he said it, like the worst part of her life could be fixed with a few simple words.
Leon let out a slow breath. His hands moved to hold her face, his thumbs brushing softly over her skin.
“It is never too late to change your life, Car. You went through all of that, and you are still here. That matters. Thank you for holding on this long.”
He paused and wiped the last tear from the corner of her eye.
“But look at where you are now,” he continued, his voice gentle, like he did not want to make things worse.
Carissa stayed silent, so he kept going.
“You are here. You made it through all of that.” He tapped her forehead lightly with his finger. “Now bring your mind here too. Stop living in what already happened.”
Carissa looked up at him, then pushed his finger away with a small, annoyed motion. That made Leon let out a quiet laugh.
“Car,” he said, a faint smile still on his face, “if your mind keeps going back there, then bring it to me instead. From now on, I am the one you should think about.”
Later that day, Carissa sat beside him in the car.
“I am already on my way, Al. You do not need to pick me up.”
Leon’s eyes kept drifting to the phone in her hand. He tried not to make it obvious, but he had already looked over more times than he could count.
“I am taking a bike.”
That made him turn his head fully this time.
A bike?
So that was what she thought of him now. Just some kind of driver.
Leon let out a breath and forced himself to focus on the road. That morning, he had insisted on taking her himself. She refused at first, but in the end, she agreed on one condition. He had to drop her at the bus stop near campus.
“Okay, see you, Al.”
Carissa ended the call and slipped her phone into her bag.
“How did you get so close to Alvero?” Leon asked, unable to keep it in.
Carissa turned and looked at him. “He is like you, sir. He makes me feel comfortable.”
Leon let out a quiet laugh, but there was no humour in it. “So I have competition now?”
Carissa frowned slightly, taking a moment to understand what he meant, then clicked her tongue.
“Do not joke like that, sir,” she said, turning to look out the window.
“No wonder people think you two are dating. You look like it.”
“There is nothing like that. We are just friends.”
She was not trying to convince him. That was simply the truth.
Leon gave another short laugh, this one carrying a bitter edge. “A guy and a girl can not just be friends, Car. One of them always feels something. Either him or you.”
“But you have a lot of female friends too,” Carissa replied, a hint of irritation in her voice.
“Yes, and most of them like me,” he said without hesitation. “I just do not like them back.”
Carissa made a quiet sound, clearly unimpressed. His confidence was too much, but the annoying part was that he could actually back it up.
Silence filled the car for a while before Carissa spoke again.
“You were right.”
Leon’s grip on the wheel shifted. His thoughts started running in every direction.
Which part?
Did she mean her and Alvero?
No. That could not be it.
“Alvero is my future,” Carissa continued. “If I ever think about getting married, it will be with him. If it does not work out, then I will not marry anyone.”
Leon struggled to breathe for a second.
This was worse than he expected. She was not just close to Alvero. She had already imagined a future with him.
“Why?” he asked, his voice not as even as he wanted it to be.
“Because he is the only man who does not make me feel scared when I am close to him.”
Leon glanced at her, forcing a small smile to hide the pressure building in his chest.
“But you are not scared around me either.”
Carissa looked at him, then spoke without thinking. “Then you are my backup.”
She meant it as a joke, but Leon did not take it that way.
He went quiet, clearly not pleased. Carissa noticed and gave a faint, satisfied smile.
He was not the only one who could treat someone like an option. She could do the same.
Leon was about to speak, ready to argue, but Carissa cut him off first.
“I am joking, sir.”
She tapped his shoulder and laughed, the sound light but with something sharp underneath.
Leon could not respond.
The moment he saw her laugh like that, everything else stopped mattering. The irritation, the jealousy, all of it faded. His eyes stayed on her, taking in every detail. The way her face lit up, the sound of her laughter, the curve of her lips.
It was the kind of beautiful he could not look away from. And for a moment, he forgot how much it hurt.