Chapter 301 That Was Not the Life I Wanted
"Because that home isn't a place that makes me happy."
Caroline's voice was soft but certain. "I understand a lot of things. I know that as long as I stay home, I'll still be the Neville Family's daughter, still standing in the spotlight. But Alexander, I don't want that."
She shook her head. "In that house, I've never been happy. I have to bear my mother's resentment toward me, and carry a blame that's been drilled into me since childhood. They say that when my mother was pregnant, I 'stole' Edith's nutrition, which is why she's been weak since birth."
Caroline paused and sighed softly. "My father does love me, but I can feel that even if he doesn't agree with my mother's approach, he's just as worried about Edith's health. That means they won't focus much attention on me."
She lowered her voice even more. "Alexander, maybe it's not right for me to say this. You used to like Edith. But I... I don't like how things are now, yet I have no choice but to be good to her."
Edith was her sister. Blood ties were like a contract, binding Caroline firmly in place, making her carry too much.
"Everyone says she's sunny, cheerful, and kind. When she's in a room, people look at her first. Maybe I'm jealous of her. But I've really been in her shadow for too long."
Caroline's gaze didn't waver. "It's not that I don't love Edith. On the contrary, sometimes I even feel like I owe her. But deep down, I know clearly that maybe if I leave, everyone will be better off, including myself."
She gripped Alexander's hand tightly. "I'm not as gentle and quiet as I appear. I want to live more boldly, more like myself. But in that house, I can't."
"I want to leave that home, Alexander."
"Don't feel like you owe me, and don't feel like you're holding me back. Actually, I'm glad you were the one who first suggested 'let's move somewhere else.' I never had the courage to take that step before, but now I finally have the chance."
"Alexander, you're not ruining me. You're pulling me out."
"So even if one day our love is gone, I'll never blame you."
Alexander's eyes grew hot. Without realizing it, he had gripped Caroline's hand back, though his fingers kept trembling.
This was the first time he'd heard her speak her heart to this extent, and the first time he truly understood what kind of life Caroline had at home.
He turned and gently pulled her into his arms, his palm tenderly stroking her hair. He didn't dare use force, as if afraid that one rough movement would shatter the truth she'd finally managed to speak.
In that moment, as Caroline leaned against him, Alexander didn't know what she was thinking. Maybe she was relieved, maybe grateful, or maybe she'd just finally found a place where she could let her guard down.
In that moment they leaned on each other. To each other, they were both the only warmth and the only weight.
When Irene learned of Caroline's decision, she talked with her for a long time. Alexander didn't know exactly what they said, but when Irene left, her eyes were red.
Caroline had probably told Irene many truths, just as she had that night leaning against Alexander, speaking bit by bit.
Irene finally understood Caroline.
Before leaving, Irene handed all her saved money to Alexander.
"Take good care of Ms. Neville." She paused, her voice hoarse. "I never understood before. Ms. Neville never lacked anything, had such good conditions growing up, but there was always something weighing on her. Now I understand. I thought I knew her, but I never really put myself in her position."
Irene took a deep breath, her eyes reddening, but still managed a small smile at Alexander. "I'm truly glad she met you. Please take care of her, I'm begging you."
She didn't make any elaborate gestures, just solemnly shook Alexander's hand, as if handing over a responsibility.
Alexander immediately steadied her wrist. "Please don't do this. Taking care of Caroline is what I should do."
He handed back the stack of money wrapped in an old handkerchief. "This is money you've saved for many years, I can't take it. Please trust me, I'll make sure Caroline has a good life. Please take it back."
Irene shook her head, her tone firm. "I've never had children in my life, this money isn't much use to me. I've always thought of Ms. Neville as my own daughter. Please keep it. Please take care of her for me."
As if afraid Alexander would refuse again, she turned and quickly walked away as soon as she finished speaking.
Alexander held the money, standing in place for a long time without moving.
He vowed in his heart that he would never let Caroline down. Once they settled down, he would find a way to bring Irene to them, so she could have a place to call home too.
The plan to leave was finally underway.
However, beautiful dreams are always fragile.
The calmer the surface of the water, the more turbulent the undercurrents often lurking beneath.
The change came on a late autumn afternoon.
The weather was beautiful that day. The sunlight was soft, the sky so clear it was almost blinding.
Alexander and Caroline had just returned from the market, having bought some storage boxes, planning to leave in a few days.
Alexander carried the boxes in front, Caroline followed behind with a lighter basket. They walked and chatted casually, discussing what to make for dinner.
But when they rounded the small grove near home, already able to see the familiar roof of the farmhouse in the distance, Alexander suddenly stopped.
A chill he couldn't quite describe shot up his spine, quickly spreading through his limbs. It wasn't imagined fear, but an instinctive alarm left from surviving multiple brushes with danger.
The farmhouse was too quiet.
Not the reassuring quiet of ordinary days, but an unsettling, deathly silence.
The clothes that had been drying in the yard were gone. The doors and windows were shut tight. Even the stray cat that usually napped by the door was nowhere to be seen.
A faint but expensive tobacco smell still lingered in the air.
"Caroline." Alexander lowered his voice to barely a whisper.
"Don't come closer. Turn back. Go to that cave where we took shelter from the rain when we were cutting wood, remember? Go now, immediately!"
Caroline sensed something was wrong too. Her face went pale, her fingers instinctively gripping the basket tighter. "Alexander, what's wrong? Is it..."
"Don't ask! Just go!"
Alexander spun around and threw the boxes in his arms into the nearby bushes.
He gripped her shoulders hard, holding her in place. His gaze locked onto hers, as if he needed these words to burn into her memory, leaving no room for hesitation.
"Listen, no matter what happens, don't come out even if you hear anything! Wait until dark, and if I don't come find you, leave on your own, go to..."