Chapter 62 Sixty-Two

Chapter 62 Sixty-Two
Amber
I didn’t catch a wink of sleep all night.
How could I sleep? How could I rest when I knew my siblings were in the other room, lying stiff as the dead, yet there was no sign \`1of decay on them? How is that possible? How could Dageian save their bodies without any form of ice or preservative?
I knew the answer. We all did. Dageian must’ve turned them into the undead too. Still, it was difficult to wrap around my mind. All this time, I thought they were dead, and they were. But not as dead as I thought. Was this the reason why they didn’t find their bodies? It had to be. Dageian kept them as trophies.
Sick motherfucker.
Sighing, I turned in the sheet again, my eyelids heavy and my head thudding, yet sleep would not relieve me. After we found Alex and Aliah, I was utterly stunned into silence that I didn’t speak after telling the twins who they were. Drew asked me questions, ranging from what I wanted to do to if I was okay. Eventually, the twins lifted my sleeping siblings from their coffins and vowed to meet us back at Drew’s house.
Drew rode my bike, and though I was conscious of all that was happening around me, I was numb to the whole world. I didn’t move or speak when we finally pulled into his driveway. I still didn’t talk when Mason took us to the room where he laid Alex and Aliah on a bed, and I didn’t utter a single word when Drew took me to the shower.
How could I? What would I say? That I’m happy they’re alive? I am, but it all seemed like too much for me.
Drew woke up a few times in the night when I stirred, but I acted like I was sleeping, ensuring to keep our mental block in place, so he didn’t figure it out. Sometimes he’d caress my cheek for ten minutes straight until he finally fell asleep again.
It was now 4 in the morning, and I felt Drew stirring beside me again. I quickly snapped my eyes shut as I heard him groan. His arms went around my waist first as he pulled me to his chest, and I felt as he pressed a kiss to my forehead as he gently squeezed my arm.
“Still not sleeping, huh?” I heard him say, and my entire body stiffened as he said this. I should’ve known. There’s only so much I can hide from him.
Reluctantly, I opened my eyes, instantly meeting his troubled grey ones. I sighed, hating that I caused him such worry all night too.
“How’d you know?” I asked, my voice coming off much smaller than I anticipated.
He chuckled a little as he continued to trail his hand up and down the length of my arm. “You’re my mate, Amber. I’ve spent nights watching you sleep. I think by now, it would be pretty clear when you aren’t sleeping.”
I sighed again. Of course he knew how I slept.
“Talk to me,” he added in a small voice. “You haven’t said anything since… you know?”
I nodded and dropped my gaze from his. “I started rogue hunting because I knew that Alex and Aliah did it. And though it got them ‘killed’, I felt it was my duty to pick up where they left off. I wanted to avenge them so badly, you know? I wanted to carry out their legacy.”
“I know, baby,” Drew whispered as he brushed a tear that I didn’t even notice from my cheek.
“I accepted their death, Drew. It was hard, but…”
I shook my head, finding it hard to speak my mind. How can I tell him that seeing that my siblings were somewhat alive killed me inside? It meant that all I did in their names was null and void. I already regretted killing rogues who were doing nothing wrong. Yet, I always told myself that every rogue I killed could’ve been the ones who killed them. Hence I shouldn’t feel too guilty. Now, I had nothing to blame but myself. I’m a killer. I have always been, and what hurt the most was when they wake up, they’ll be disappointed in who I became after they died.
They always tried to keep me away from their world because they believed I was better than them. I was supposed to stay innocent. I wasn’t supposed to yield to the darkness.
But I did. And when or if they wake up, they’ll be met with this rude awakening, that their baby sister, who they sheltered all their lives, had become the one thing that they tried to keep me from.
If only I’d known from the beginning that it was Dageian, I would’ve gone after him alone. He would’ve been my target from the very beginning. But it’s too late now.
There’s no turning back.
“It’s okay, Amber. You can let me in. Let me be there for you. I know this is hard,” Drew whispered.
And so I did. I let my walls fall, immediately flooding him with my emotions. He gasped in a mouthful of air, and I immediately went to block him again, but he shook his head.
“No, let me feel it,” he protested as I slowly lowered it again. With a deep breath, he pulled me to his chest and gently placed a kiss on my forehead. “I know this is hard for you. I do. Let me help you.”
“How?” I desperately wanted some release from this pain, guilt and self-contempt. Drew rubbed small circles in my back as he took a deep breath.
“I’ve never done this before,” he said. “But I’m sure it’ll work. Just focus on my energy, okay?”
I nodded and did what he said. I tried my best to focus on his energy. I was immediately engulfed in warmth and peace so strong that it instantly soothed my entire nervous system. I felt as if I was being pulled into a realm by itself, where there was nothing but melodious songs and rainbows. My mundane issues no longer lingered in my mind, and it felt as if I didn’t even remember what I was upset about.
There was no pain, no grief, and when I thought of my siblings, all I felt was pure ecstasy that somehow, no matter how they are alive. That joy was buried deep under my sorrows when I saw them, but Drew brought it to the surface.
They’re alive. And even though they aren’t alive as humans, soon I’ll get to see their smiles again.
And that simple but elating thought finally drove me to deep, well-needed slumber.