Chapter 103 Chapter 103

Chapter 103 Chapter 103
Elorai.

My answer arrives as the adjoining door opens and someone steps out, a towel wrapped around their lower body, the rest of them dripping wet.

I lift my gaze to meet Ronan's and stiffen.

He caught me red-handed, alright.

“Sorry for, um... barging in. I didn't hear anyone, so I helped myself,” I stutter, feeling my cheeks heat up, my gaze darting everywhere but him.

He doesn't say anything. Just watches as I flounder. I'm almost tempted to leave, but he walks away instead, heading straight to the wardrobe to pick up some clothes.

I clear my throat, one hand pressing the pillow I'm holding tightly to my chest while the other starts scratching my neck nervously.

“Why isn't Lucas or Knox here?” I ask while he dresses.

“Lucas isn't home,” Ronan growls, pulling up a pair of grey sweatpants. He turns back to me. “And I have no idea where Knox is.”

Eyes narrowed, he cocks his head to the side. “Why are you here?”

I swallow tightly. “Um... it's...” I start but can't find the words. “I was going to spend the night here, but it's alright. I can just go sleep in my room if you don't want the company.”

I say this while already turning around, my hands reaching for the doorknob.

“Would you be plagued by nightmares if you did that?” Ronan's voice cuts through the room.

I freeze, my hand hovering in the air.

To be honest, I'm not sure. I haven't really attempted to be alone for a while now, ever since I found out that I'm usually not plagued by nightmares when I'm with them.

I look back at him, my hold on the pillow tightening even harder. “I think so.”

“Then you can stay if you want,” he says, pulling on a shirt and toweling his wet hair dry.

I bite my lip. Well, it's too late to leave now.

I fix my gaze on the grand bed and amble toward it, sitting at the edge for a moment before moving to the center and laying my pillow down, gingerly resting against it.

Ronan spends a great deal of time toweling his hair dry.

Once he's done, he gets on the bed himself after turning off most of the lights.

We lie there in companionable silence, neither of us saying anything to the other for the longest time.

That's when I realize I've never been truly alone with Ronan since that night in the kitchen. It feels so long ago now.

“I heard Lucas spoke to you,” Ronan begins unexpectedly, breaking the quiet.

I swallow tightly, barely glancing at him when I respond.

“Yes, he said something about bonding with all of you,” I murmur quietly, fiddling with my fingers.

I feel him turn. “Did he tell you why?”

I shake my head. “No, he didn't mention that.” I glance at him. “Is there a reason?”

He shrugs. “It's mostly political more than anything,” he grumbles, turning back to face the wall across from us. “Basically, we've been ordered to have mates.”

My heart drops to my stomach at the statement. “Why?”

“To increase our numbers and all that nonsense. Thorn's experimentation on our kind did do a number on us.”

Something twists in my chest. So there's a reason for that sudden discussion, and here I was thinking it's because he liked me.

Tears threaten to sting my eyes, but I blink them back, taking a deep breath instead. I realize Ronan is still speaking, so I give him my full attention.

“It's something we've been avoiding for years now. But now, if we don't take one willingly, we'll be forced to.”

“That isn't nice,” I comment.

“It isn't. But the council doesn't care about that.” He sighs, sinking deeper into the bed, his hands clasped behind his head.

A while later, he mutters, “You're the only female we've felt the most comfortable around in years, so we're trying to take advantage of that.”

My feelings aside, I ask the question that has been bugging me since the conversation started. “What will the council think about this? Bonding with me, I mean.”

“The council shouldn't care as long as the union produces children.”

“Oh...” I trail off.

“I'm not saying this to scare you. I'm just bringing it up so you're not disillusioned about what we're asking from you.”

“Thank you for telling me this...” I mutter, feeling a newfound sense of clarity.

Yet despite this, I can't help the new heartache I get from this information. Do neither of these men care about me besides what they want to gain?

The tears fight their way to the surface once more, and it's a struggle to keep them at bay.

“To be honest...” Ronan adds, more to himself than to me. “The idea of bonding again scares me more than I'd like to admit.”

Huh? I'm about to ask why when I remember what happened to his late mate. Of course, such a memory would scar him, even now.

“It would kill me if something like that were to happen again.”

He groans, his voice filled with more emotion than I've ever heard from him before.

Then he glances at me, and I feel my heart do a flip.

“But if it's with you... I'm willing to try.”

I gasp, a flutter of hope spreading across my chest.

Just like Knox, he too didn't say the words outright, but at least he's no longer ambiguous. That gives me some measure of relief.

“You don't have to agree to it if you don't want to. I'm aware we are asking for a lot, and it may be something you're not willing to give. Either way, the decision is ultimately yours. No one will take that from you.” He mutters, still staring at me.

My mouth opens, but no words slip out.

Ronan holds my gaze for a beat longer. “Have a good night,” he suddenly announces, turning to his side.

“Good night...” I whisper, still at a loss on what to do.

Long after he's fallen asleep, I stare at the ceiling and think about his words for a long, long time.