Chapter 135 What if I don't
Hermes
I clench my teeth as I see her eyes widen.
I knew this was going to be hard, but the look on her face—God, it tears something inside me.
Her mouth parts slightly, disbelief painted across every inch of her expression. It makes my chest ache, because I can tell she thinks I’m choosing power over her. Maybe I am. But not for the reason she believes.
Natalya is onto something. I can feel it. And June—
June needs to leave that company before Natalya ruins her like she did Yena back in college.
That memory still haunts me. Yena, broken and humiliated because she got too close to me. Natalya had made sure to destroy her in every way that wouldn’t leave a visible scar. June can’t go through that. I won’t let her.
She’s standing there, still wearing that gown, still looking like she stepped out of a dream I don’t deserve. And all I want to do is hold her and tell her the truth—that I’m sick, that I don’t have time, that every decision I make is a desperate attempt to shield her from what’s coming.
But I can’t.
Because once I tell her, she’ll fight for me. She’ll stay.
And I can’t let her waste herself on a man who might not even live to see the next season.
"I’m sorry, June," I whisper, more to myself than to her. My throat feels tight, my voice cracked from holding back too much for too long.
Her eyes glisten with tears again, and I have to look away.
If I stay one more second, I’ll break.
"I’ll have the car send you home," I manage to say, tone flat—cold enough to mask the chaos inside me. I turn away before she can respond, because if she says my name again in that trembling voice, I’ll give in.
I take a step, but my feet feel like they’re sinking into tiles. Each movement away from her feels like a betrayal I’ll never forgive myself for.
Behind me, I can feel her watching. Her silence presses against my back, heavy, accusing.
If she only knew.
If she only knew that I’m not pushing her away because I don’t love her—but because I love her so much, it’s killing me to stay.
The door bursts open before I can even move, and her voice slices through the thick air between me and June.
"Sorry I’m late," Natalya says, breathless but smiling. Then her gaze lands on June—in that gown—and for a moment, the world stills.
Her lips part, and she breathes out softly, "You look so cute in that, June."
June’s head jerks slightly, startled. I see her fingers twitch at her sides, and something in me snaps.
Before Natalya can take another step closer, I grab her wrist. "Let’s go. We need to talk."
"Excuse me?" she says, pulling back, but I tighten my grip.
"Now," I grit out, already dragging her toward the door.
The attendant stammers something behind us, but I don’t hear. My pulse hammers against my temples. June’s reflection in the mirror flashes once more in my mind before the door shuts, severing me from her completely.
I shove Natalya into the passenger seat and slide behind the wheel. She mutters my name, demanding an explanation, but I ignore her.
I just drive fast out of the city. Away from walls and people and the suffocating stench of pretense that’s been eating at me for weeks.
By the time we reach the edge of the city, the skyline shrinking in the rearview mirror, I slam on the brakes and step out. The air here is cleaner, colder—sharp against my lungs. I need that. I need clarity.
Natalya storms out after me, slamming the car door. "What the hell was that, Hermes?" Her voice rises, sharp and accusing. "You embarrassed me in front of my staff—dragged me out here like I’m some kind of—"
I pace. My fists clench. The urge to shout festers under my skin.
"Answer me!" she snaps, hands on her hips.
I stop. Slowly. My mind is spinning, every memory of June flashing like static—her voice, her tears, her name falling from my lips a few minutes ago.
I turn to face Natalya, jaw tight, my teeth digging into my bottom lip. "Did you know?"
She blinks. "Know what, Hermes?" Her tone turns airy, dismissive. She folds her arms, rolling her eyes like I’m being dramatic. "You have to be specific, honey."
That word—honey—makes my blood boil.
I take a step toward her. "Don’t play dumb with me." My voice drops low, calm but dangerous. "You’ve been circling her. Don’t think I don’t notice."
Natalya tilts her head, feigning confusion, but there’s a flicker—a small, smug flicker in her eyes that tells me she does know.
And that’s when I realize—
She’s been waiting for this moment.
A scoff leaves her lips, the sound sharp and venom-laced, and strides toward me, heels crunching against the gravel.
Her lips curl. "Do you mean—" she snarls, eyes flashing, "—do you mean if I knew that you were fucking your employee in secret? Or the fact that your little secret happens to be a twenty-two-year-old intern?"
Her words hit like a slap. I stare at her, blinking once, twice, jaw ticking.
There she is.
The real Natalya Voss. Cold, calculated, and manipulative as hell.
I exhale through my nose, shaking my head, a humorless scoff slipping past my lips. "Are you being serious right now?"
Her eyes widen theatrically, as if I just said something absurd. "Of course I’m serious," she says, her tone dripping with disbelief. "She’s a child, Hermes."
I freeze for a moment—then laugh.
A quiet, dry laugh that spills out before I can stop it. It isn’t amused; it’s hollow. Because hearing her call June a child after everything she’s done in her own life—
It’s laughable.
She narrows her gaze, demanding, "What’s so funny?"
But I can’t stop. I tilt my head back, letting the bitter laughter rumble in my chest. Not because any of this is funny—but because it’s insane. Because Natalya thinks she can label June as something dirty, small, unworthy, when she has no idea who that girl really is…
I finally stop laughing, jaw tightening as I bite down on my lower lip, fury simmering beneath my skin.
"Well," I start, voice low and cutting, "I remember being the same age as June when you did what you did to me."
The words hang heavy in the air.
Thick silence falls between us like a storm cloud ready to split open.
We just stand there—fuming, breathing, daring the other to speak first.
Natalya exhales sharply, breaking the tension with a scoff. "My God, Hermes. That was a fucking long time ago." She rakes her fingers through her hair, frustration coating every movement. "And for heaven’s sake, you’re a guy. You enjoyed it, at the very least. Besides—"her lips twitch into that old bitter smirk "—I did that to drive that bad-luck Yena away. You know she only wanted you because of your money."
My chest tightens. I shut my eyes, forcing in a breath, trying to push away the pathetic, nauseating memory she just dragged up.
"See," I mutter finally, voice flat but heavy, "I don’t want to fight with you."
I open my eyes and look at her dead-on. "I just want you to steer clear of June. Her internship is ending soon, so just… leave her alone."
She nods slowly, her expression unreadable. Relief slips from my chest in a quiet sigh—until she tilts her head, lips curving.
"What if I don’t?"
My head snaps toward her, the air between us tightening like wire.
Of course. I should’ve known better than to believe Natalya could just agree and walk away.
She moves closer, eyes fixed on mine with a dangerous calm expression. Her fingers reach for my tie, playing with it. "I thought for a beat that she was just a fling," she murmurs, tone slow. "Some young girl you fuck and forget. But seeing the way you’re acting…" her voice drops to a whisper, "I think my first guess was right. She’s more than that, isn’t she?"
She lets go of my tie, smooths her hand down her pants, and walks back to lean against my car. "So," she says, crossing her arms, "I’m going to keep her close. I want to know what she did to change Hermes Grande."
"Natalya, drop it. It’s not worth it." My fists clench. My voice shakes from barely contained anger. "Just—drop it."
She tilts her chin, the smugness in her face fading into something sharper. "You don’t get to tell me what to do." Her glare could slice through steel. "I’m the one who holds all the cards here, honey. Imagine if I—" she pauses, twirling a strand of her hair between her fingers "—tell everyone that June is sleeping with her boss. What do you think will happen to her career? Her reputation? Her internship?"
"You wouldn’t dare!" I snap, stepping forward, rage bleeding into my tone.
"Oh, I would!" she fires back instantly, her voice like a slap.
For a second, the world stills—my heartbeat loud enough to drown everything else.
I drag a hand through my hair, chest tight.
What the hell am I going to do?
Sorry for the late update. I've been sick.