Chapter 23

For some time they sat without moving, just holding each other. Julian was reluctant to break their union. When finally they did, Tate sighed. Julian knew Tate also regretted their separation.

They showered. Neither of them spoke. They communicated their feelings for one another through their kisses and caresses. When the shower was done, they went down to the kitchen. There Julian fixed them a breakfast of sausage and French toast.

The doorbell rang just as they finished eating.

“I’ll get it,” Julian said, rising from his chair.

“No, let me. It’ll be Mary coming for my therapy,” Tate said, his voice revealing an unexpected enthusiasm.

Tate retrieved his crutches and made his way out of the room. Julian smiled after him and began to clear the table.

After finishing rinsing the dishes and loading the dishwasher, Julian made his way to the therapy room. What he saw brought a lump to his throat. Tate was walking, albeit unsteadily, on his new leg. When he saw Julian, he smiled and made his way awkwardly toward him. When he was within arms’ reach, Tate tripped and fell into Julian’s arms. Julian’s alarm was assuaged when Tate smiled at him and whispered, “Thank you.”

Through his tears Julian saw Mary beaming at them. “I don’t know what you said to him, but Tate is a different man today. He’s determined to learn to use his new leg.”

Julian didn’t know what to say. He held Tate briefly. Then Tate stood on his own and walked back to Mary. Julian sat and watched the rest of the session. By the time it was over, Tate was sweating profusely, but smiling broadly.

“You’ve made remarkable progress today,” Mary told him. “For now, you better remove the prosthesis. You don’t want to irritate your leg by wearing it too long at first. Once you adjust to it you should be able to use it all the time.”

Tate did as he was told and removed the leg. Mary checked the stump to make sure it wasn’t chafed. Then she reapplied the stump sock.

Saying again that she was impressed with Tate’s change in attitude and how far they’d come, Mary bade the pair goodbye. They wished her well on her weekend trip. Before leaving, she told Tate she would be back the day after the holiday at the usual time.

After she had gone Tate turned to Julian, who went to him and wrapped him in a hug once more. “I’m so proud of you.”

Tate kissed him and replied, “Without you this wouldn’t be happening.”

They held each other for a moment longer. Then Tate said, “Should I shower now or wait until after?”

Julian laughed. “I’ve unleashed the lustful dragon. After. We’ll just have to do it again then anyway.”

They made their way upstairs, undressed, and lay next to each other. Once again neither spoke. They merely looked into each other’s eyes as they caressed each other. No words were needed to express the deep emotions that Julian felt were building between them.

Had it ever been like this with Virgil? Julian asked himself. If it had, these wonderful bliss-filled thoughts of care and concern had long since departed.

How could he have forgotten how good these feelings could be? He’d combined his frustration over his relationship with Virgil with what he considered the superficiality of gay life. He was beginning to realize that his desire to move away from the excesses of the gay lifestyle, didn’t need to include rejecting love.

Tate turned on his side away from Julian. Julian spooned closer and guided himself into Tate’s body. Wrapping an arm around Tate’s chest, he drew Tate close and let his growing affection for the man flow over them both.

* * * *

After lying together for some time, they got up and took their shower. As they dried each other, Julian offered to make something for lunch.

“I think we should go out for lunch.”

Julian looked at him with eyebrows raised.

“Yeah, that’s what we should do,” Tate continued, as if trying to convince himself. “I’ve cooped myself up in here too long. I want to be done with playing the hermit.”

Julian hesitated to respond. Tate had just begun to gain an understanding of his emotional isolation—just made his first attempts at mastering his new leg. Would this be taking on too much? Julian didn’t want to see Tate set himself up for discouragement.

Tate misread his hesitancy. “Of course, if you’d rather not.” He glanced down at his leg. “I’d understand,” he said, his face losing its air of expectancy and clouding over.

“Oh, no,” Julian hastened to say. “I was only surprised. Of course I want to go to lunch with you. That would be great.”

Tate’s face lit up once more. “Okay! Where shall we go?”

“Do you have any favorites?” Julian asked.