Epilogue
⊰ **Marcel** ⊱
The steady beep of the vital signs monitor echoes through the sterile hospital room, a constant reminder of the fragile life hanging in the balance. I sit by Mercy’s bedside, my hand clasped tightly around hers, my eyes fixed on her pale, still face.
It’s been a month. A month of watching her chest rise and fall with the help of machines, a month of praying for a miracle that never came. The doctors say there’s little to no brain activity, that the chances of her waking up are next to none.
*I can’t let her go.*
Everyone has already come to say their goodbyes. Levi, his eyes red-rimmed and his voice hoarse. Alessandra, her sobs echoing through the hallways. Even Santiago, clinging to Alessandra as she fell apart in his arms.
And now, it’s my turn.
With a heavy heart, I sign the papers to withdraw medical care, my hand shaking so badly I can barely hold the pen. The doctor gives me a sympathetic look, his hand resting briefly on my shoulder before he moves to remove the tube from Mercy’s mouth, to disconnect the machines that have been keeping her alive.
I stop him before he can turn off the vital signs monitor. “Leave it on,” I rasp, my voice rough with unshed tears. “I want to know the moment she…”
*The moment she leaves me.*
The doctor nods, murmuring a soft, “I’ll give you some privacy,” before slipping out of the room, leaving me alone with the woman I love, the woman I failed to protect.
Slowly, I climb into the bed beside her, carefully gathering her in my arms. She feels so small, so fragile, like she might shatter at any moment.
“I’m so sorry, baby,” I whisper, my lips brushing against her forehead. “I’m sorry I couldn’t save you, that I couldn’t give you the life I promised.”
Tears spill down my cheeks, soaking into her hair. Every day since that fateful moment, since I watched her fall, watched the light fade from her eyes…it’s been killing me. The guilt, the grief, the aching emptiness in my chest where she used to be.
I reach up, my fingers brushing against the cross hanging around my neck. *Her* cross, the one she gave me that day, to protect me. I’ve been praying over it every day, the way she prayed over it for me. Begging God to bring her back to me, to give us another chance.
*But He didn’t answer. He took her away instead.*
I close my eyes, remembering the vivid dream I had last night. We were standing on the balcony of our bedroom, watching the sunset paint the sky in shades of orange and pink. My arms were wrapped around her, resting on the swell of her pregnant belly. I could feel our child moving beneath my palms, a tiny miracle we created together.
I planted kisses on her neck, relishing in the sound of her soft giggles, the way she squirmed in my embrace. “I love you,” she murmured, her voice filled with the same depth of emotion as the first time she said those words to me.
In that moment, I wondered, yet again, what I ever did to deserve her. How someone as broken and tainted as me could have been blessed with such a pure, beautiful soul. She was my redemption, my salvation. The light in my darkness.
And now, as I hold her lifeless body in my arms, I can’t help but think that maybe…maybe this was meant to happen. Maybe losing her was the only way to wake me up, to pull me from the abyss of sin and violence I’d been drowning in for so long.
Mercy believed in God’s love, in His mercy. She believed that if we repented, if we turned to him, we could be forgiven. That we could be saved.
*I never would have repented without her. Without losing her.*
She was my mercy, in every sense of the word.
“I’m not letting you go,” I whisper fiercely, my arms tightening around her. “I’m never letting you go.”
I’m choosing to believe what she believed. That there’s still hope for me, still a chance for redemption. Because she saw the good in me, even when I couldn’t see it myself. She loved me, not in spite of my darkness, but *because* of it. Because she knew that there was light inside me, just waiting to be freed.
*I’m going to follow her. I’m going to dare to go where I never thought I could.*
With shaking hands, I reach into my pocket, pulling out the syringe I prepared earlier. The lethal dose of cyanide glints coldly in the fluorescent light, a promise of release, of peace.
I press the final kiss to Mercy’s lips, breathing in the fading scent of her, committing every detail of her face to memory. “I love you,” I murmur against her skin. “I loved you all my life.”
I watch the monitor, waiting for the moment. And when I hear it, when I finally see that line go flat, I plunge the needle into my vein, depressing the plunger. The poison burns as it enters my bloodstream, a searing pain that fades into a spreading numbness.
I lay my head on Mercy’s chest, focusing on what’s left of the warmth of her skin. As the dizziness takes hold, as my own heart begins to stutter and skip, I let my eyes drift shut. I let myself imagine that we’re back on that balcony, wrapped in each other’s arms.
*In this life, I couldn’t save her. I couldn’t give her the future she deserved.*
*But in death…in death, we’ll be together forever.*
*No more pain. No more suffering. Just an eternity of love, of peace.*
*Just her and me, the way it was always meant to be.*
As the darkness closes in, as the world fades away, I swear I can feel her hand tighten around mine. I can hear her voice whispering in my ear.
“I love you, Marcel. I’ll always love you.”
A smile curves my lips as I take my final breath, as my heart beats its last.
*I’m coming, muñqeuita.*
*Wait for me.*
And finally…peace.
Endless peace, and the lingering echo of the woman who saved my soul.
*My Mercy.*
**~ The Mafia's Mercy ~**
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