Chapter 123 What to think of it all?
>>Seraphina
It gave me a scare.
My heart almost jumped out of my chest and I blinked aggressively to look at the screen. It didn't do much, so I immediately began to wipe my tears with my sleeves.
It can't be,
Someone's typing??!
Frantically and aggressively, I slid my rough sleeve across my eyes and I managed to clear my view to look at the screen again.
Oh...
And my heart fell.
Then I scoffed at myself.
I guess I've really lost it. I guess my mind is too delusional or too messed up at the moment.
Why would there be anyone typing at the other end? That's not even possible.
I stared at the screen that stood still, like it had been for many years.
Stuck in time, since my mother's passing
My hands trembled with blood on them.
I let down a shaky gulp as my mind raced.
My breathing was abnormal, there was something excessively wrong with me. I clenched my fists, trying to forget about it. But, can I forget about something like this?
Someone grabbed my clothes from behind, "Sera," I looked back at Eris.
Huh?!
Someone was holding her in her arms.
"Who are you?" I stepped towards the woman, "Hey," They seemed to be moving away,
"Hey!!" My hands reached out to her as she turned around to walk away with my sister in her arms, "Let Eris go," The weight of an impending threat bore down on me, a heavy anxiety that gnawed at the edges of my consciousness, "Eri!!!" I called her name, my eyes stuck on her as I tried to run to them but Eris turned her head away, looking disappointed.
NO!!
I tried to run faster, but before I could reach her, before I could even attempt it, something cold pressed against my wrists and I couldn't move. Not that I was moving much at all even though I was trying, but that's when everything around me came to a still.
Huh?
No, wait. What is happening?!? I looked back and my eyes went wide. There stood a police officer, he was looking at me like I was some sort of heinous animal. He closed the handcuffs around my wrists.
"Wait," I shot my head at the woman taking Eris away, "She's taking my sister!" I looked back at the officer who had a blank face, I couldn't see his eyes or his mouth, "Sir, she's kidnapping my sister!!"
"She's not your sister anymore," He began to drag me away, ignoring my pleas "You're unfit to take care of her." Anxiety took over all of my being.
"What?" I felt horrified, "No," I shook my head, "I didn't do anything wrong!" I tried to resist. I felt restless. The dread of ending up alone was shaking my entire being.
The officer didn't give me an answer, he paused and looked back at me. Even though he had no face, the way he was looking at me made me feel like he was saying, 'You didn't do anything wrong?' He pointed at my hands and I looked down at them.
!!!
There was warm, fresh, red blood dripping down from there, almost like a stream. Everything around me was white, which further highlighted the crimson red on my shaking palms. It was as if there was only me, and the sin on my hands.
He then pointed in another direction.
I slowly turned my head to look in that direction, already aware of what I was going to see. And it was, A body lying in a pretty red puddle.
"You're a murderer"
A sudden gasp escaped my lips as I jolted awake, my body drenched in a cold sweat. The remnants of a haunting nightmare clung to my consciousness, the vivid images still playing in the recesses of my mind.
"Oh God," The room, shrouded in the soft glow of moonlight, felt unfamiliar as I tried to anchor myself in the reality of waking life.
The echoes of the dream lingered, leaving my heart pounding in my chest. In the darkness, the weight of guilt and fear pressed upon me, "Oh hell..."
I looked around, trying to figure out where I was, and it took me a few seconds to recall I was no longer in my own house.
I took a shuddering breath, attempting to shake off the lingering unease.
Oh... It's okay. The room's familiar contours gradually asserted themselves as I scanned my surroundings, reassuring myself that I was indeed awake. The nightmare's grip began to loosen, replaced by the cadence of reality.
I looked to the side. Eris was still asleep.
She was still by my side. Yet a heavy anxiety gnawed at the edges of my consciousness.
I gulped. That woman I saw in my dream. She must be Eris's mother. She left right after giving birth to Eri, leaving her at our doorstep as she vanished without a trace.
I wiped the sweat away from my neck. She's someone who abandoned her daughter, she won't be coming back, right? I gulped again, trying to lubricate my throat.
Right? She can't come out of nowhere and take Eri from me. She can't,
I placed my hand on Eri's cheek softly, so as not to wake her up. But she must have felt the touch as she eased her face into my palm. Looking at that made me relax.
I let out a breath of relief and got up from the bed and walked out of the room. I felt sick. I should get myself some water before I go back to bed.
I walked out of the room and made my way to the kitchen attached to the lounge.
I wasn't expecting much from this place. It was just given to us and all and it'll probably be taken away soon too. I just wanted water and tap water would have been enough. But as I crossed the fridge, I don't know why I chose to open it. Maybe it was just out of curiosity.
But I was surprised.
There wasn't just a sealed water bottle there but also some pancakes. The syrup was dripping over the edges of the fluffy round shaped food, which made me realize I was hungry.
Oh,
My stomach rumbled loudly, indicating that I was in desperate need of food.
Right... I haven't eaten...
I immediately took the plate out, but as I pulled it out, I noticed a note on it.
'Take the meds after you eat, I can't have you blacking out on the streets again'
Huh?
Wait, blacking out again? Is this note from Azef?
And take meds? My eyes wandered around. What meds-? It took me a split second to spot the medicine box lying on the small kitchen table.
...
I stared at it,
Now there was a weird feeling that swelled inside of me. It wasn't like it was a sweet note or anything but for some reason, I felt very grateful for it.
I thought he was a cold asshole but maybe I was wrong.
Didn't he want to use me? He said he'd sell me. I walked to the table and sat down.
Why be so nice to me? He brought me here, let me sleep, had Eris fed and now there was food for me too? I stared at the medicine.
A confused feeling lingered in my heart and mind.
What does he want?
I pursed my lips as I took off the wrapping.
Come to think of it. He didn't say I'd have to pay for this house but- I looked at the pancakes. I would only be staying here as long as I can serve my purpose to him.
I took one bite of it, and then paused only to continue like crazy.
The pancakes were delicious.
I attacked those eats like a beast unleashed. The aroma alone was a party for my senses, and I wasn't about to hold back. Fork in one hand, knife in the other, and I went to town on that plate like my life depended on it.
Bite after bite, I could feel the hunger slowly backing off. I was eating without any etiquettes and I didn't even realize someone was watching me.
I don't even know for how long he stood there and watched me, I only realized there was someone else there when I heard a snicker.
!!!
It made me pause. My eyes went wide as a wave of fear passed through me. I shot my head to the side to see him standing there,
Azef, with a bemused expression on his face, was looking at me, "You got a little," He pointed around his lips with a smirk. Caught in the wild act, I felt a flush of embarrassment that caused my ears to heat up.
I immediately reached for the crumbs on my lips and wiped them off.
Oh My God!
How long was he there??! Wait! How did he come in? When did he come in? Why didn't I hear anything?!?
"H-how did you get in?" I asked
He began to walk over, "How did I get into my own apartment?" There was a sarcastic tone in his voice, "I wonder, maybe because I can walk through walls."
I felt further embarrassed at myself.
God!
What is wrong with me!! Of course he can come in as he likes! It's his place!
"I mean, what brings you here," I tried to cover my blunder, "It's so late,"
"It's going to be dawn in an hour," He came over and sat down on the chai
r across from me, "I came here for something else but I got a feeling you were up, so I came here to talk."
"Talk about what?" I felt nervous,
"Your usefulness of course,"