Chapter 151: BLAKE’S POV
Chapter 151: BLAKE’S POV
The next morning I avoided everyone like the plague. After that blasted sexual showdown last night, I barely slept a wink. Sienna's like a drug. You crave her more even knowing quite well that she's bad for you.
I let myself into my study. One glance at my desk was all it took and all the memories came flooding back like the hounds of hell.
When I followed her last night, I planned to confront her and to tell her to fucking get it together and leave. But none of that happened—the capricious Sienna emerged again and all hell broke loose. She looked like an evil enchantress when she widened her legs and touched herself. My hardened resolve disappeared instantly. She looked like a perfect sexual treat and ready to be devoured. I was spellbound.
I grunted as I remembered how she was last night. I bloody fucking hate her. She loves to toy with my emotions. Swinging back and forth like a bloody blasted yoyo with no consideration of the people involved. She always used sex, dangling it like a piece of heaven. Yes, sex with her felt like that and then some. It's actually quite cruel really, but she needs to let me go.
This damn circus is over!
I will take immediate action to exterminate her from my thoughts—I want to look at her and feel nothing. If I have to marry Camilla to achieve it, then so be it. I'd rather have a well-oiled functioning life than this half-filled amorous fantasy I have in my head. I have an empire to run and I cannot risk failure. Not even for a beguiling, bewitching, beautiful woman wreaking havoc and causing mayhem in my orderly life….and utterly left me to shreds. She needed to be addressed and I did. Her wounded face almost stopped me from leaving her all alone in this very study last night, but it must be done—even if I once worshipped the very ground she walked on not so long ago.
I picked up my phone and dialed Camilla. She instantly picked up and sounded a little breathless. "Blake! What a lovely surprise. When I heard the ringing tone I allotted for you, I dashed right out of the shower." She nervously laughed, "and oh, Happy Birthday! I got you a present but you have to come and get it once you get back to England."
I smiled at her breathless tone. Camilla was still very taken with me. "Thank you, Cam. I definitely will. I will not allow you to begrudge me of my present." She laughed huskily.
"Can I ask you something, Cam? You don't have to answer it but I'm quite curious." I raked a hand through my hair and grabbed a nearby pen and fiddled with it restlessly.
"Anything, you can ask me anything."
I cleared my throat as my eyes burned the exact spot I took Sienna last night. It was just sex….that's all she wants. With that, I shoved memories of her in the very back of my mind.
"I was wondering you see. I was pondering if you still loved me?"
"Blake—I do. You know I do. You're the only man I have ever loved and the only man I have ever given myself to. When I made that promise, seven years ago, when we were barely eighteen—I meant every word." She whispered, "I love you. I have loved you all my life and nothing's changed."
I waited a minute or two to gather my thoughts. Her answer did not come as a surprise but it still pleased me that she did, well at least someone does. I'm quite positive that I will learn to love her later on during our marriage.
"I know this is untoward and quite drastic, but I was hoping if you would still be interested in continuing our marriage arrangement? You don't have to give me an answer this instant—I need you to dwell upon it for a day or two. I will be back in town on Wednesday—you can tell me your answer then."
"As you wish, Wednesday can't come soon enough. I will be waiting for you," she happily murmured. She tried to masked her happiness but failed miserably.
We spoke for another ten minutes before ending the call. Magdalena softly knocked and cheerfully wheeled in a pot of coffee and assorted pastries. "Gracías, Magdalena ¡Que tengas un buen día!" Have a good day.
The door opened and Chad sauntered in, he never tries to knock.
"Anything I can help you with mate?" I walked over to the coffee and prepared myself a cup.
"Everyone's planning to go to the beach, want to come with and grace us with your sexy body?" Chad asked.
I laughed. Chad is the only man who can get away with talking to me like this. He grew on me through the months and his audacious personality didn't bother me.
"My 'sexy body' is on a hiatus my dear friend. Work awaits and simply cannot be ignored. I will join the festivities once you guys get back."
He folded his arms and shrugged. "Whatever, you say boss. You better finish all the work before we get back. We'll give you a few hours but nothing more. It's your birthday weekend and you deserve a little fun in the sun too, Blakey poo." With a quick wave, he left me in peace.
The study is the only place where I can find peace and quiet. The rest of the villa was an utter jungle of people ready to have fun and get drunk. I was about to open the terrace door to enjoy my coffee outside when another blasted knock interrupted me. Bloody fuck.
"Come in," I hooted.
The door opened, a nervous looking Sienna strolled in. I was dumbstruck when she entered.
She was dressed in a long ethereal, white Grecian dress. She even did her hair like the ones you see in the movies. Chaotic, long wavy curls styled with succession adorned with a thin gold and silver threaded headband. The only thing that stood out was her eyes and soft glossed lips.
My eyes wandered from head to foot and back again. But her eyes held me in place. Her long lashes were thickly coated with mascara and her eyes rimmed with a gold liner. Those captivating gold/green eyes impaled me—but her sheer beauty made me lose the capacity to think. My cock twitched in response at the stunning goddess before me.
Motherfanfuckingtastic!
She switched her footing and fidgeted with her hands. I stood mesmerized and waited for her to speak.
Sienna huffed out a heavy sigh and bit her lip. This ought to be interesting, I thought, noticing how unsure she was.
"I was thinking—if you wanted to collect—the proposition you offered a few weeks back—which I agreed to." She stammered through her words.
Did she just say what I thought she said?
Could it be?
"I beg your pardon?"
"The five-day proposition—I'm offering it to you."
Oh, damn it to hell. Was she serious? "Right, as tempting as that sounds, I'm afraid I have to decline that rather appealing offer. Thank you though. Is that all you wanted? I'm rather busy."
I took a long sip of my coffee and expected her to leave but she had not. She was still rooted on the spot, looking a bit lost. "You're declining? It was your idea in the first place! What's changed? You weren't declining last night!" The lost look turned into accusatory glare.
I waited a beat until I spoke. I wanted—needed—to savor the look on her face when I told her my good news. "Everything's changed you see. About an hour ago, I offered my hand in marriage to Camilla, if she'll have me again."
Oh, bloody joy! The look of horror hit her full-on.
"But—but….but we had sex last night?" she whispered through tears.
Her tears didn't even move me, not anymore. "Your point is? It's just sex Sienna. You were gagging for it, so why not? It was right there and you were quite easy." I smiled wickedly at her, enjoying her tortured face. "A pussy is a pussy. A man can get it anywhere and from now on—I will surely be fucking and will be getting fucked by Camilla, my future wife."
She gripped the back of the chair and for some reason, it reminded me of her calamitous visit to my office in South Bank—the one where she confronted me with my engagement, the hellish irony.
The room was deafening, I could hear her erratic breathing as she took in the news. When she looked up, the hurt in her eyes almost—almost made me want to reach out to her. "You can't do that—you mustn't."
"Too late," I shrugged without care.
She was sobbing. "But I love you…I've been in love with you."
My eyes misted with anger at her confession. "How bloody fucking convenient! Let's stop the charade, I'm growing rather bored."
"But I do love you Blake—I lied because I was scared. But I'm tired of being scared. I wanted to start living my life—that's why I came here speak to you. I wanted to give us another try—and for me to do that, I had to forgive you and I did… and I have, forgiven you."
"Do you know how I longed to hear you utter those three words? I used to dream about it—I wanted it so bad—I wanted you so bad, it hurt. But you fucking didn't give a hoot about any of that. Sex was all you wanted from me. You admitted it as such—no need to lie anymore. It's over."
Nodding as she wiped a tear. "I guess it really is," she sniffed. "I really am very sorry, Blake. For all the intentional and the unintentional pain I caused you. I did it all because I love you. This love—with you was different from what I had with Kyle. It was exquisitely intense, it overpowered all of my senses—and it terrified me. I protected myself by wanting to shut you out. But you dissolved that layer of protection and I was left vulnerable. That made me defensive. But it's all silly now isn't it?"
She gave a small laugh.
"For what it's worth, I just want you to be happy and if marrying her will make you happy—then I wholeheartedly give my blessing."
She was about to leave but halted. "I'm going to pack my things and leave. Can you tell them that there was an emergency with Kyle and that he needed me there? I can't face any of them right now. Um, I guess—I'll be seeing you."
Giving me a brave genuine smile, she tore me apart. "Goodbye, Blake."
I stared at the shutting door, utterly flabbergasted.
She said she loved me—for the very first time and now she's leaving.
She was lying, of course she was. Because she never did love me, if she did, she wouldn't have waited until the very last minute. But this is Sienna—her roughened childhood made her defensive and it was the only way she knew how to protect herself. Could she possibly be telling me the truth?
Do I want to spend the rest of my life trying to figure out if she meant those words or not? Hell the fuck no!
I sprinted through the main floor, through the stairs and towards her bedroom door. I didn't even bother to knock before I let myself inside.
Her luggage was on the bed and she was putting her neatly folded clothes inside. She kept wiping her tears away and sniffing softly.
Her back stiffened when I spoke. "I will give you a month—a month to show and prove to me that you meant what you said downstairs. I will hold off any talks of my engagement for that allotted time. I'm not guaranteeing you anything. I don't know if I would want you in my life after the month is over. It is purely up to you, if you want to do this or not."
"A month?" she asked, turning around.
"Only a month."
Pressing her lips together and wiped another tear. "Okay, I'll take it."
I felt relieved for some reason. "All right then, I guess you can unpack and rest a bit while I work for awhile. You can keep this room but I expect you to share my bed every night." She nodded and bit her bottom lip.
"Blake?"
"Yes?"
She looked so gorgeous it hurt even if she's crying buckets and sniffing 'til kingdom come, she always took my breath away. "Would it be too much if I asked you to kiss me?"
She melted a fraction of my cold heart. "No, not at all as long as you promise to stop crying, I don't like seeing you cry." I went to where she stood and gently wiped her tears away.
When our lips touched, she sighed delightfully. I meant to kiss her for a minute or two—but it was hard to pull away once it started to get heated and ardent with passionate need.
I stopped when I tasted tears and pulled away with worry. "What's wrong?" I studied her face, but she smiled through her tears.
"I'm just happy—thank you for giving me this chance." I nodded and left the room with troubled thoughts.
A month, Knightly….one long arduous month, surely you can manage to not fall back in the throes of love with her by your side?