Chapter 181 *
Graham's jaw had gone tight. Nico was looking at his hands.
Scarlett was watching Zelda the way you watch something that doesn't surprise you.
"The whole family is a waste of potential. Honestly. Sal built something real and he handed it to a bunch of people who don't know what to do with it. If Owen and I are running things in five years, it's going to look completely different. Better."
The recording ended.
Zelda was already turning to Viviana again, already composing her face into something hurt and desperate.
Lorenzo said, "Last one."
This recording was quieter than the others. The ambient noise was different — a car, maybe, or a room with a window open. Zelda's voice was relaxed.
"The thing about Viviana is that she's never actually recovered. She thinks she has. She goes to her appointments, she takes her pills, she tells herself she's fine. But I've watched her for a long time. I know exactly which conversations pull her back under. The right pressure in the right place, and she goes right back to where she was. It's just a matter of timing."
"Once that happens — once she's in the hospital again and Sal's managing the fallout — Miranda can stop hiding. There's no reason they can't be together properly at that point. They've been waiting long enough."
The audio stopped.
Viviana's hand went slack over Zelda's.
For a moment she didn't move at all. She was still sitting in the same position, still facing forward, and the only thing that changed was that the color left her face in a slow way.
She was thinking about the last time. She was thinking about the room with the white walls and the window that didn't open all the way, and the way the medication made the edges of everything soft and unreliable. She was thinking about Zelda sitting on the edge of her bed in that room, holding her hand, saying you're going to be okay, Mom, I'm right here. She was thinking about how she had held onto that voice the way you hold onto a rope in the dark when you can't see the bottom.
She was thinking about all of it.
She was thinking about the fact that Zelda had been watching her the entire time. Cataloguing her. Learning which words and which silences and which combinations of pressure would send her back to that room.
Waiting for the right moment to use it.
Viviana stood up.
Zelda turned toward her immediately. Her eyes were already wet, and her voice was already doing the thing it did. "Mom. Listen to me. That's not what I meant. That recording is—"
Viviana had heard this voice a thousand times before.
That was the thing she hadn't understood until this exact moment. She had heard it when Scarlett first came home and kept saying something was wrong. She had heard it after every dinner that ended badly, every meeting where Zelda's behavior had been questioned. And every single time, she had listened. She had soothed, because that was what you did when you loved someone.
She had believed she was smart. That was the particular humiliation of it. She had believed for nineteen years that she was a woman who could not be fooled, who read people clearly. And Zelda had been standing inside her blind spot the entire time, operating freely, because Viviana had built the blind spot herself and called it love.
Viviana slapped her.
The slap snapped her head to the right. The sound of it landed in the room like something breaking.
Zelda stumbled sideways. Her hip caught the edge of the table, and she went down hard, one knee hitting the floor, her hand scrabbling for the leg of the nearest chair. Blood was already seeping from the corner of her mouth where it had caught the table's edge. She was looking up at Viviana from the floor with her eyes wide and her chest heaving.
"Mom—" Her voice cracked. She was crying. "Mom, please—"
Viviana reached down and grabbed her by the collar of her blazer and dragged her back up.
Zelda's feet found the floor unsteadily and her hands came up to grip Viviana's wrists.
"Out of every person in this family." Her voice was raw and uneven. "Out of every person I have ever loved — you. You were the one I chose every single time. Not my blood. Not my children who came from my own body. You."
"I gave you everything I had. I gave you my time and I moved my own daughter out of the way so you wouldn't feel threatened. I did that. I chose to do that." Her eyes were streaming. "Why wasn't that enough? Why weren't you ever—" Her voice broke entirely. "You were sitting there waiting for me to go back to that room. You knew how to put me there. And you were just—"
She couldn't finish the sentence.
Zelda's hands were clutching her wrists and her face was pressed into her shoulder and she was saying things — that's not what I meant, I was just venting, I never would have, you have to believe me, please, you're my mother, you're the only mother I've ever had — and the words were coming fast and close together and they were hitting every frequency that had ever worked on Viviana Romano before.
Viviana drew back and slapped her again.
This one knocked Zelda fully off balance. She went down to both knees this time, and the chair tipped, and she caught herself with one hand on the floor, her hair falling across her face, blood and tears mixing on her chin.
Hi everyone, sending a quick note from my heart to yours!
I’m so sorry to have to do this, but I need to take a short break from our story. Some unexpected family matters have come up that need my full attention and presence right now. As much as I love disappearing into our world of fiction, family always has to come first!
I’m already counting down the days until I can dive back into writing. I’ll be officially resuming updates on February 26th. I’m going to do my absolute best to get back to you as quickly as I can—I miss these characters (and all of you!) already.
If you want to keep in touch or check for any early sneak peeks, please come find me on Facebook! I’d love to see you there.
Name: Xena Kessler
Profile Pic: You’ll recognize me by adorable Abyssinian cat! 🐱
I’ll be posting updates on the return schedule and sharing news about my upcoming books there, so it’s the perfect place to hang out while I’m away.
Thank you all so much for your incredible patience, your sweet comments, and for being such a supportive community. It truly means the world to me and keeps me going.
Sending you all so much love, and I'll see you on the 26th!