Chapter 42 I Won't Cry Anymore
ADRIANA
watching Leo fall asleep made me feel a semblance of what mothers must feel when they look at their children. He wasn’t mine but I loved this little boy like he was. Maybe it was because I needed someone to pour my love into.
When I finally have my own kids, parenting won’t be completely new to me because of him. After he’d fallen asleep, I stayed with him, holding his hand and thinking about what he’d been through.
What kind of mother would leave her son alone, knowing he didn’t have a father either? If Elijah hadn’t been there to take care of him, what would have happened to Leo?
Elijah was the best thing to happen to him after Liam’s death and I was grateful they had each other.
I still wondered why Elijah hadn’t found his mate yet after all these years. I didn’t know if I should ask him. I knew that I wasn’t his mate and whatever this was between us was just temporary. Once he found his mate, I’d be cast aside.
That was another reason I didn’t want to get too attached to him. I was trying to protect myself. I really wasn’t lucky with men. But then again, I knew I wasn’t Landon’s mate and I still stayed.
I just hope whoever Elijah ends up with treats Leo well. He’s a fragile boy and he needs care from someone patient and loving.
I really hoped this new doctor was going to help him. It would be wonderful if he started speaking soon. Elijah would be so delighted.
I saw the worry in his eyes when he came into my room earlier. That was what scared me. This boy was his life and if anything ever happened to him, it would be devastating.
After making sure Leo was deeply asleep, I left his room to go back to mine. I’d temporarily forgotten about my problems and it felt good. Now that I was out of that love bubble, I was gloomy again.
Today was the first time I’d come out of my room since I had that dream. I needed time to think. To sit with what Yara was saying and the reality that I couldn’t reject it.
I’d been made for this cause and there was no getting out of it. Way to go, Moon goddess.
I hadn’t had another dream after that so I spent my time thinking and crying, hoping I’d dream again and see Yara so I could ask her more questions.
When were they coming?
Elijah and my father were at odds. Were they going to come for him too? If yes, how do I stop that?
And how do I start utilizing my powers?
I opened the door and saw Elijah sitting on the bed.
I just stood there, looking at him. He knew I’d been lying about not crying earlier and I knew he knew, so there was no need to continue the lie.
“Come here.” His voice was gentle but commanding. I found myself heeding to it before my brain could even catch up. He spread open his arms and I walked right into them.
“It’s okay. I’m here.”
I know. But right now, I doubted this was a problem he could solve. In fact, if he knew about this, how would he see me?
I was bringing enemies to his doorstep and I felt terrible. Should I tell him?
“Do you want to talk about it? It’s okay if you don’t.”
I wanted to talk to him about it but how do I start? What should I tell him? That I saw my wolf in a dream and she told me I was a special wolf and I would be the one to stop the Antil Cult he hates so much?
It sounded like I was mocking him.
“I’m scared. I feel like everything is happening too quickly and I’m scared.”
He stroked my head and held me tighter.
“It’s going to be okay. I promise, I’ll sort things out.”
I didn’t mean to cry but once the lump formed in my throat and the tears started falling, I couldn’t stop them. I shook in his arms and we stayed like that, me crying and him holding me and stroking my hair and telling me everything was going to be okay.
Somehow we ended up on the bed and he just held me. I felt guilty because he thought he was the cause of my problem and I didn’t want him to feel bad, but at the same time, I couldn’t tell him what was actually wrong.
After a while, I stopped crying and just lay in his arms. I knew Yara said not to be scared but I was a girl hearing this for the first time and I was expected to just suck it up and accept it.
It scared me. What if I failed? All the others before me had been killed and none of them had gotten a chance to fulfill their purpose. But that wasn’t the same for me.
I mean, I hadn’t been killed yet. And that was because they hadn’t come for me. What happens when they decide to come? What form will they take and what will they do?
What if they get me too and manage to kill me just like the others?
What if I fail and they continue in their evil? What will happen then?
I’ll be hated and I’ll just die for nothing.
“Are you asleep?” he asked.
I raised my head up to look at him.
“You can stop crying. I’m here now.”
As he touched my face, I smiled a bit and nodded.
“I won’t cry anymore.”