Chapter 43 THE GIRL I BURIED FIVE YEARS AGO
Celestia's POV
Lucian carried me as if I weighed no more than a feather. Honestly, it's left me a little flustered I had always been a little insecure about my weight no matter how much of it I lost after all I had a mate who was supposed to be the one complimenting everything he could about my body, and yet it was his job to constantly torment me and tell me all the places where I was lacking.
"I'm not saying that you have to do rocket science or anything really difficult like that but skipping a meal here and there leaving out a snack will not kill you or anything I think it will actually be really healthy for you don't you think so too I mean let's go off the carbs and lose some weights it's would look great on you,"
Back then I thought that was all I had to do to lose a little bit more weight and I would have all his attention just to myself but it seemed like the more I degraded myself and drained my body the less interested he seemed to have in me.
As if destroying myself for him was not good enough as if it didn't come close yet all the other woman had to do was to breathe in his direction and he was pouring all the praises that he could just on her it was a bit devastating to think about it that way to think about how little of me he had ever cared about even the man that held me now he's affection was not genuine it will simply an act with a performing for others we will know different from actors on a stage except our state was much more broad and we couldn't exactly break characters so casually there was no definitive backstage.
However, it closed the door away from everyone else while I rested a bit. It was as close to a backstage stage as we were going to get.
"How are you feeling?" He asked me the question as if he had found me there in silver chains as though I had been locked away for weeks all of a sudden it was as if he wasn't even asking me about what happened just now well so just that it was but it was as if he was speaking to the woman 5 years ago who had been thrown into his soul screaming and calling for somebody anybody to reach her there was something that was both devastating and comforting about that.
"I'm fine..." I said sitting comfortably on the bed, "... But they don't need to know that day? We will tell them that I'm devastated. The place was so vile and terrible that I think I might have nightmares about it they reopened an old wound for me let's use this to our advantage,"
He reached over and cupped my cheek.
He had said that there was only one reason why we were doing this for the audience to make them believe that we cared about each other but I don't think there was any audience right now just the two of us perhaps it was for practice I took it to that way and decided not to strain my head thinking about any other scenario where he felt so obliged to softly carries my cheek like that sharing the warmth of his palm over to my face in your way that's made me want to lean right again this and just take it all they were something about his touch that just made me feel so greedy and ashamed of that greed at the same time.
"You're sure you're good right?"
I almost broke that was this question I wanted to hear five years ago the question that beating woman pushed down to the bottle of her world just wanted to have whispered in her ear even if it was nothing more than a flimsy lie told to console her I was near telling him just how much it's devastated me how I had played my cool there but now it was running over in my head and I couldn't get the image out couldn't get it from my mind from vibrating all over and messing with me in my head.
"I'm good," I reassured him even if that was a little shy of the truth but he didn't need to know about the complexities of my internal struggle even when I told him about what had happened years ago I only showed surface level emotions anything else would have drag those back wasted our time and we had to move forward after all everything about this place through the me we were not going to follow the parts and have a little pep talk for me every time something seem to set me off.
"Now back to what I was saying before I'll take a wide guess and say that Raphael did not agree to reopen the case did he?"
He noted his head affirming what I was already sure of.
"Echo still makes him reopen the case whether he wants to or not but we have to remember that we are still within his territory so we will have to go through a couple of troubling technicalities but..."
"That won't be necessary," I reassured him with a smile, "thanks to that woman we will not have to worry about this taking too long I just had an idea well I had it from the moment we step in that's why I sent a maid to call her and pretend like she had been someone by Raphael instead I knew just how she was going to react when she saw me and of course she played right into my hands without even realizing it herself now she will be the reason for her own Doom,"
He looked at me with a smile that reached his ears saying nothing but the approval that was written all over them told me what I needed to know.