Chapter 136 Part 136
Emerson
It felt odd to wake up with no message from Asher waiting on her phone. She wasn’t sure how she felt about it. Asher was a smart man, and her actions all yelled at him to give her space.
He normally called her at night, and he hadn’t done that the previous night, he also hadn’t checked in that morning. Her first thoughts were that he’d gotten hurt somehow, but she knew Eden would have called her if he had.
She spent the day working on her new children’s book, another Morbid adventure, but her concentration was shot to hell. She missed him.
She didn’t know what to make of Eden’s visit either. She’d always been good at getting people to tell her exactly what she wanted to know. She was convinced of one thing though, Asher hadn’t completely forgiven her.
There were days back in Minneapolis when she convinced herself that everything had been in her head. Maybe Asher had never felt the same way about her.
Her thoughts were conflicting as she replayed their last conversation. The one where he told her he loved her, too, right before she left. For her it was easy. Asher was the only man she’d ever really loved.
Her relationship with Grover had consisted of fear, commands, and abuse. Asher had shown her that there was a world where men didn’t yell, where they didn’t have to use force, or threaten a woman to comply. He’d shown her the meadow and the peaceful bliss of being on a horse’s back.
She finally gave up and stood in front of the cupboards in the kitchen. She looked at all the ingredients and smiled. The baby kicked her hard, and she sucked in her breath.
“Easy, little guy. What’s with all the excitement?” She rubbed her hand over the spot where he’d kicked, and smiled as he settled down. She grabbed her phone, and her finger hovered over Asher’s name.
He won’t remember what they had if she ignored him the whole time. She didn’t want to ignore him, but being in his presence also hurt her. It hurt to know that his feelings had changed, but Eden’s words had given her hope, and now she felt like an idiot for hoping.
She pressed the green button, and put the phone against her ear. It rang a few times and then she heard his voicemail. ‘Leave your name and number. I’ll get back to you.’
He was probably busy on the ranch, but she knew he’d call her back. He was dependable like that. She opened her messages and clicked on Eden’s name.
Emerson: Is it a busy day at the ranch?
Eden: The boys are out herding. Dylan and Winchester stayed behind for other chores.
Emerson: Thanks
He wouldn’t see her missed call until he was done for the day. She smiled again, and started preparing to bake him a pie. He loved pie, any kind really, and if she wanted to have a nice and civil conversation with him, it was going to be with pie.
When she settled down again a bit later, her concentration was much better, and she started sketching the scenes of Morbid’s adventures. For a while now, she wanted to do a book about Morbid going to the army, but she kept hesitating. The idea was for it to be cute, parachuting out of a plane, and skiing the sand slopes of the desert. Her editor loved the idea, but she hadn’t committed to anything yet.
Morbid was something special she had shared with Asher, and it didn’t feel right to do an army theme without his approval. Instead, she concentrated on Morbid’s world travels. It was a series she was busy with, and each book would concentrate on a specific place like Egypt, the Eiffel Tower, the Smithsonian, and so on.
Her phone rang on the couch next to her and she smiled. “Hey, Shirley.”
“How are you settling in?”
Emerson’s smile faltered a bit. “I’m as settled as can be.”
“What was the cowboy’s reaction to your little baby bomb?”
She laughed, and leaned back against the couch. “He took it really well. He’s excited about the baby.”
“Why don’t you sound happy?” Shirley had been by her side throughout the entire pregnancy. She’d been the one that sat with her while she cried her heart out.
“He didn’t respond when I said I still loved him. I don’t think he feels that way about me anymore.”
“Oh, Emmie, I’m sorry. Why don’t you come home? I’m here, and I won’t leave you, no matter what.”
Emerson could feel the tears well up in her eyes, but she wiped them away as they fell. “I can’t leave now. I made him a part of this, and now I have to sleep in the bed I made. I can’t force him to love me, it’s just going to be hard when I see him in town, and he’s met someone else.”
“Has he met someone else?” Shirley asked her.
“I don’t think so. His sister came to see me. She said he still loves me, but I can’t see it. She didn’t see the way he reacted. I’m just hormonal and stupid.”
“You are not stupid, Emerson Reid! You just fell for the wrong man. We all do it, it doesn’t make you stupid.”
“I love you, Shirley, you’re the best friend I could ever hope for,” Emerson said.
“I’m here for you, no matter what. If you need me, I’m just a phone call away. I can get on a plane in a few hours. I love you, Emmie, don’t ever forget that.”
“I’ll be okay, I’m just overly emotional because of the hormones.”
“Okay, well, call me. Take care of yourself.”
“Bye, Shirley.”
Emerson put her sketchpad aside, and poked at the dough she’d taken out to defrost. She started preparing the pie for Asher. If he didn’t love her, didn’t feel anything for her, he needed to say it in words.
She needed to know exactly how he felt. It didn’t matter if it hurt her or not. She needed to know for her own sanity.