Chapter 20

As King Domiano and I returned to the palace after seeing the condition of the people, my mind was filled with many things. The journey had shown me just how many challenges the kingdom faced, from crop failures to wars that devastated the lives of the people. I could feel King Domiano’s deep concern for his people, and I began to understand why he took these matters so seriously.

The carriage carrying us swayed gently as it entered the palace grounds. I was still thinking about the scene I had just seen. Before, I thought that life in the countryside would be as beautiful as the lush natural scenery. But the reality was different. Many people were starving, even though their land looked fertile. I could see the worry on King Domiano’s face as he observed the farmers and villagers talking about the falling food prices and the houses damaged by the war.

As we got off the train, King Domiano immediately gave orders to one of his advisors to summon the royal officials. “Gather them all in the meeting room. We must immediately discuss strategies to solve this problem,” he said in a stern tone.

I heard the order and was amazed by the way he led. He was not only thinking about the people, but also thinking ahead about how to tackle the crisis that was engulfing the kingdom. I couldn’t help being impressed.

“Your Majesty,” I said, a little hesitantly. “May I be present at the meeting?”

King Domiano looked at me with a pleased expression, but there was a hint of worry in his eyes. “Of course, Dean. I’m glad you want to come,” he replied gently. “But don’t push yourself. You’ve been tired a lot lately. I don’t want you to faint again in the middle of a meeting.”

I smiled a little at his concern. Although this body was Dean’s, I had to admit that I often felt weak here. “I’m fine, Your Majesty. I want to listen to what was discussed.”

He nodded, and we entered the palace. I followed King Domiano into the grand meeting room. It was already filled with royal officials and representatives from various regions. The atmosphere was tense, but controlled. King Domiano sat in the main chair, while I took my place next to him. I felt a bit awkward in the middle of a room filled with serious faces, but I tried to remain calm.

They had great charisma and it suited their persona, which was that of people who belonged to the nobility. I was quite amazed that they didn’t rely on their status as nobles and act arbitrarily.

At least that’s what I’ve seen until now, but I haven’t seen and heard their thoughts because this meeting hasn’t started yet.

The meeting started quickly. One of the representatives from the border region reported that many farmers were having difficulties because the price of food bought by neighboring kingdoms was getting lower and lower. “They are suppressing our purchase prices,” he said, his voice trembling with frustration. “Our people cannot sell their crops at a decent price. Even with a bountiful harvest, they live in poverty.”

A royal advisor chimed in with the suggestion, “Perhaps we should raise commodity prices for those kingdoms that do not honor the fair trade policy. That way, we can ensure the welfare of our people is maintained.”

I listened carefully to every suggestion that was made, and was increasingly amazed by the way King Domiano responded to each opinion. He was very skillful, giving his full attention to each issue presented, yet still firm in giving direction.

It was a good thing that my expectations of them were completely fulfilled by their competent nature. Because I was worried that my expectations of them would be shattered by their true demeanor, which could have been someone who was reckless and also just hungry for wealth and selfishness. Let’s just say that they are good people and also think of the interests of those in the poorer classes.

“We also need to consider allocating more funds for fertilizers and farm equipment,” said another royal official. “If we can increase the people’s crop yields, then we will have more supplies to sell at better prices.”

King Domiano nodded in agreement. “Right, we must ensure our people have access to the resources they need. But we must also not let our guard down against outside threats. The wars that rage across the border continue to disturb the peace of our people. We need to strengthen our troops to be able to protect our territory and ensure that no other kingdom dares to undermine the peace we have built.”

The discussion continued, with various solutions discussed to address the problems facing the kingdom. I was fascinated to see how serious and organized the government system was here. King Domiano was truly wise and knew how to make good use of his resources.

But amidst my admiration, something nagged at my mind. How did I get involved in all this? I’m just someone trapped in Dean’s body. This world wasn’t my world, and I wasn’t a leader who could make such important decisions. But as time passed, I began to feel more and more attached to life in this kingdom.

After the meeting was over, everyone slowly left the room, except for me. King Domiano stood up from his chair and patted my shoulder gently. “You did well, Dean,” he said with a smile. “I’m glad you wanted to come along today.”

I could only nod, feeling awkward with his praise. After King Domiano left, I headed to the palace library. I needed time to reflect, to try to understand what was going on in my mind.

In the quiet library, I sat at one of the large tables surrounded by shelves full of books. My gaze fell on one of the history books of the kingdom of Jordan lying on the table. I opened the page without thinking, my eyes gliding over the ancient writings about the wars and treaties that bound this kingdom to neighboring kingdoms.

“Maybe reading that book can also make me feel better. Books are one of the most interesting pastimes,” I monologued.

Just so you know, my mind is really racing right now. I don’t know when I became such a thinker like this. I’m always thinking about everything even from the smallest things, is this maybe because of Dean’s true nature?

I felt caught between two ways of thinking. On the one hand, I admired the way King Domiano led his kingdom and felt like helping. But on the other hand, I knew that I didn’t belong in this world. Dean was the one who was supposed to be here, not me. And King Domiano’s forced arranged marriage was making things even more complicated.

If I think about it once again I’m starting to think that I’ve gotten too carried away with the feeling of being someone who actually lives in this one world.

That was evidenced by how I wanted to contribute to improving the order of life here. But why would I do that if I’m also going to leave this world later?

Even if it was all a way to get out of here, why wasn’t I told from the start? And also I wasn’t so sure that fixing the problems here was a way to get out of here because there was absolutely no clue about how that was a requirement so that I could return to my world as before.

I know how important matchmaking is to this kingdom. By becoming Junigo or Jade’s mate, the Bordan Kingdom will gain great power. Their power will expand, and other kingdoms will be afraid to oppose them. I can see why King Domiano is so determined to match Dean with one of them. But, can I do that? Can I betray Dean by taking over his life and making such a big decision?

I let out a long sigh, feeling dilemmatic. On the one hand, I felt that the matchmaking would be of great help to the kingdom, but on the other hand I couldn’t shake the feeling that I was taking something that didn’t belong to me. This was Dean’s body, Dean’s life, and I couldn’t make this decision without thinking about what Dean would feel if he was still alive.

I leaned my head against the chair and closed my eyes, trying to calm my mind. But the images of Junigo and Jade kept haunting me, along with all the dilemmas they brought.

It’s not about weird thoughts like I feel for Jade and Junigo in the human world, I admit that sometimes I do often think of their charms and because of my sexual orientation I also sometimes imagine hot and erotic things with them, but because I’m stuck in a situation like this I don’t think it’s so enjoyable because the problems that keep haunting my mind make me not very passionate about doing that.

There are always things that prevent me from getting erotic and romantic love from the men I want. In my home world I couldn’t love them because they didn’t share my orientation and they hated me too. From this world, I couldn’t do that because of an impulse of dislike that inexplicably arose in me just like that and also because of the limitations of our status as different beings.