Chapter 17

I was still lying on the bed, pretending to be unconscious while my mind floated around, digesting what had just almost happened. Jade... almost kissed me. Oh my God, I really didn’t know what to think about that. At first glance, I could feel him getting closer, almost touching my forehead. But before He actually did, Jade suddenly backed away.

Now, the sound of his slightly heavy breathing filled the air around my bed. He must have realized what almost happened. Inwardly I mocked him. ‘Embarrassing, isn’t it’

Had I not been in such a precarious situation, I might have laughed. But this is not the time. If I were to laugh in the current situation, it would be ridiculous considering that I’m now known to be unconscious in front of him. How could someone who fainted then laugh at someone just like that? I would definitely be labeled a liar and it would also spread to Dean himself, poor Dean.

While I was pretending to faint, I heard Jade’s soft and remorseful voice. “I’m sorry, Dean,” he said in an almost melancholy tone. “I... I shouldn’t have behaved like this. I promise I’ll behave myself. What’s more... I’m someone who’s considered some kind of angel. This is not appropriate.”

His words immediately caught my attention. ‘Some kind of angel? What does that mean?’

I had always thought he was really an angel. How could there be any doubt in his status? He had incredible power, an aura that was so intimidating, but there was something in his words that made me suspicious. But even so, he still has extraordinary power, is it possible that he is not really an angel but just someone who is classified as an angel?

I didn’t know that there was such a class, although I also didn’t know if this was the true meaning of his words or if it was just a misunderstanding and misspeaking by Jade.

‘I have to know what he meant.’ I thought with eager curiosity

Cautiously, I decided to change my plan. Perhaps, if I pretend to be awake now, I can extract more information from him. This was too good an opportunity to miss. I took a deep breath, then slowly opened my eyes, as if I had just woken up from a long stupor.

“Ahh...” I let out a low voice, trying to sound as weak as possible. I turned my head slightly, looking at Jade who immediately stood up from his chair with a look of relief in his eyes.

“Dean!” he said, his tone full of joy and relief. “You’re awake. I was so scared that you had something bad happen, I was so worried because I saw you suddenly faint.”

I feigned confusion, frowning slightly. “How did I end up here?” I asked, trying to sound curious, even though I already knew the answer.

“You fainted,” Jade replied in a soft but firm tone. “You were exhausted and depressed.”

I nodded weakly, still trying to act the part of someone who had just woken up from a stupor. “I feel... a little dizzy,” I said as I raised a hand to my head, pretending to grimace.

Jade immediately approached, standing beside my bed with great concern, perhaps too great. “Does any part of your body still hurt?” he asked worriedly. “Or do you feel something is wrong?”

I shook my head softly. “No... nothing too serious.” Then I looked at him, trying to act as if something was bothering me. “But Jade, you don’t have to keep an eye on me like this. I... I feel restless.”

The look in Jade’s eyes changed instantly. There was something there, some kind of guilt that he couldn’t hide. He looked down slightly, let out a long breath before finally saying, “I understand. I’m sorry. But... I just wanted to make sure you were okay. I... care about you, Dean.”

I could feel the intensity of those feelings from the way he said it. It was as if, behind all his strength as an ‘angel’, he couldn’t hide his deep vulnerability towards Dean.

I have to be careful now, choosing the right words. This is the right opportunity to dig deeper into what he just said about himself being a kind of angel’.I let the silence pass for a moment, looking at him with a slightly tired look in my eyes. If I hadn’t gotten more details from his own mouth, I would have had a hard time defining what he meant.

“Hey, Jade,” I said quietly, as if it had just popped into my mind. “I want to ask you something... and I want to hear your answer.”

Jade raised an eyebrow, looking a little surprised by my sudden statement. “Of course. What do you want to ask?”

I pretended to think for a moment, then looked at him straight. “I remembered something... about Aetheris and your status as an angel,” I said quietly, pausing to judge his reaction. “How can... I mean, what if we break our boundaries? If we became a couple, wouldn’t that go beyond earthly boundaries?”

My question floated in the air, filling the room with sudden tension. I could see Jade who initially seemed calm was getting a little agitated. There was something in his face that changed, some kind of inner conflict that I seemed to have just realized.

“Dean...” Jade let out a long breath, looking down for a moment before finally looking at me again. “Actually, I... I’m just a representative. I’m not entirely an angel myself.”

I frowned, feigning confusion. “Not the full extent of it? What do you mean? I’m sorry if I’m asking like this, but don’t I also have the right to know details about you because I’m someone who has been matched to you. So I have to know how the deeper characteristics of the person who will be matched.”

I could see Jade stiffen for a moment, as if he wasn’t sure how to explain. But I kept looking at him, waiting expectantly for his answer. I was very, very impatient to know something or everything that I had not heard from this person.

He finally took a deep breath, as if trying to gather courage. “There are many things you might not understand about Aetheris and me, Dean. My status as an angel... yes, that is true. I have great power and responsibility in this world. But I... am not perfect. I’m just a representative of a greater power. Something higher than myself. That’s why I... sometimes feel that I shouldn’t have these feelings for you.”

He looked down again, seemingly so disturbed by what he had just said. I, on the other hand, tried to restrain myself from being too surprised.

I thought to myself. ‘Representative? Does that mean Jade isn’t a full-fledged angel? If he could be like that does that also mean Junigo is also just a representative of a demon? That could be what made the two of them so sure to become the mate of a human because they thought it would not violate earthly boundaries.’

The more I thought about it, the more boring and confusing it all seemed.

I know there’s more to this. But I can’t force Jade to reveal it all at once. There was something deeper than just feelings and status, something bigger that he was hiding from me, or rather, from the real Dean.

I decided to wait patiently. Whatever it was, I would find it.

I let out a long breath, as if trying to digest everything he just said. “So, you’re saying... you’re just a representative of a greater angel?”

Jade nodded slowly. “Yes. And that’s one of the reasons why this... relationship... can be complicated.”

I pretended to nod as if I understood, while inside my mind thousands of questions arose. What exactly did Jade mean by ‘bigger’? And why was Dean, or rather me, at the center of all this complexity?

But before I could continue my question, Jade stood up and excused himself gently, telling me to get more rest. With a faint smile on his lips, he left me alone in the room that now felt so quiet.

Once he was out, I could finally let out a long breath freely. What just happened here? Jade... turned out not to be a complete angel. And the feelings he has for Dean seem to be more complicated than they seem. This opens a new door to all the possibilities that might happen next.

I must remain vigilant. Every word that comes out of Jade’s mouth could be the key to understanding more about this world. And perhaps, a way to get out of here.

But before I could think further, I felt drowsiness starting to attack. Maybe it’s true, I really need to rest now, at least to prepare myself for things that might be more complicated in the coming days. I had been complaining about keeping my eyes closed in a non-drowsy state but after the conversation just now I suddenly felt tired.

Did the complicated conversation with heavy subject matter make my brain become more stressed and that triggered the fatigue? I don’t know but I definitely need to rest now.