Chapter Eleven—Unsettled

When I finally arrived by the door of the master bedroom, I took some time to compose myself before walking in. As I entered, Mother was in a bad state, even worse than before. She looked paler than a while ago.

I tiptoed in but she felt my presence and turned to my direction. “Robert,” she spoke with a faint smile and a weak voice.

I walked faster and sat beside her as I reached her. “Mother, I’m right here. Gonzalo said you called for me.”

“It took you a long time to get here. Where have you been?” she asked.

“I was in the stables, taking care of Lady,” I said, holding her hand in mine. Is there something wrong, Mother?”

She then turned to the maids, “Please give us a moment alone.” The maids curtsied and left the room, carrying their basins of water and cloth.

“Mother, what’s wrong? What’s going on?” I asked once more.

“Robert, dear,” she started as she held my hands. “Can you promise me that you’ll watch over your father and your sister?”

“What?” I asked, my brows furrowed. “What do you mean? What are you talking about? Why are you saying such things?” my questions kept on coming out of my mouth as fear began to build within me.

“Robert, I know that I won’t be by your side any longer and it’s all because of this unknown illness that I have,” she explained, not forgetting to take pauses to catch her breath. “So, I’m asking you, begging for you to watch over our family as I will watch over you all from the other side.”

“Mother, don’t say that. Stop saying goodbyes. You’re not going to die,” I replied, leaning closer as I cupped her face with one hand and held her hand with the other. “This isn’t some kind of disease that you can’t survive. This is just a different type of fever that wasn’t taken care of immediately.”

“Robert, this… is my body. And I know… that this is how my body tells me… that my time is nearly over,” she answered. “So, can you give me your word? Can you promise me that?”

“Mother, I don’t understand where you’re getting these ideas from. I know you’ve been sick for more than a few days but that doesn’t mean you’re going to die,” I repeated, refusing to accept her explanation of death. “Aren’t you overreacting about this situation too much?”

“Robert, if this were just a simple fever, it wouldn’t have lasted for more than five days,” she protested. “You know very well… that whenever I get sick… it doesn’t last for two days… and I don’t lie in bed… whenever I’m ill. This one is different. Even you can’t deny that.”

“Mother, I understand how you’re feeling about this but please, until we aren’t sure of what illness you have, death shouldn’t be in our conversation,” I requested.

“But can you promise me that?” she asked again.

“Mother, please. Stop doing that,” I kissed her forehead, gripping her hands tighter. “You’re not going to die. Do you understand?”

She then laid a gentle kiss on my hand. “I love you with all my heart, dear one,” she smiled, cupping my right cheek with her hand.

“I love you more than you love me, Mother,” I smiled back.

“Now, kindly tell the maids to come back in,” she said. “Go and do whatever it is you need to do.”

“Are you sure? I can stay with you until you go back to sleep,” I offered.

“There’s no need for that, Robert. Your father and Aunt Bethilda will be here shortly,” she reassured.

“If you say so,” I forced a smile. I don’t feel comfortable leaving Mother in the presence of Bethilda. Also, I’m not amused about the fact that James spends more time with his duties rather than staying here for a longer time to look after my mother, his queen. I know he has a lot of things on his plate right now but isn’t the queen as important as those duties?

I bowed and carefully let go of her hand before I headed to the door.

♔♔♔

It’s late in the afternoon and with everything that’s happening right now, my mind has a lot of things to think about. It’s exhausting. I’ve walked around the garden for quite some time now, trying to avoid thinking about everything, wanting for my mind to rest, even just for a while. I would like to talk to Laura about this, but it seems she doesn’t want to be found at the moment.

“Robert,” a faint voice from my left interrupted my time of peace. As I turned around, James was walking towards me. Can’t anyone in this kingdom give me some time alone? “Can I have a word with you?” he asked as he stood in front of me.

“Can’t you see that I want to be alone?” I responded, trying to be as polite as possible.

“I can join you on your walk. I just need to talk to you,” he insisted. I let out a sigh and nodded, walking once more with James beside me. “I didn’t like the way you and your sister treated your aunt,” he started. “That was very disrespectful of you.”

“James, as I recall, you told me that respect is given to those who are worthy of it,” I said, my hands behind my back. “She didn’t respect our boundaries. She gave us the reason not to respect her. Why are you defending her? Shouldn’t you be defending our side? Your children’s point of view?”

“I would be on your side. However, you and you sister made the wrong decision in handling the situation,” he replied.

I asked, “Did you talk to Bethilda about this?”

James replied after a brief moment of silence, “I haven’t.”

“See? You didn’t even bother to scold her for her mistake,” I snapped as I stopped from walking. I faced James as I continued, “Just because she’s a guest in this castle and a relative, that doesn’t mean she’s exempted from our rules. The rules—your rules—apply to everyone.”

“I understand that what she did was unacceptable, but you should still treat her with respect as a relative,” he replied.

“I would like to make one thing clear between the two of us, James: I respect everyone that crosses my path,” I moved closer to him, “But when someone gives me a reason not to, then I’m sorry. That person won’t have any kind of respect from me. The same goes with Elizabeth.”

“Robert, please,” he said, calmly stopping me from walking away.

I groaned.

I’m trying my best to have a calm conversation with you, both as a king and as a father,” he continued. “Let us not treat each other with hostility just because of what your aunt did.”

“James, you’re making me act this way,” I replied. “And please, I don’t want to talk about anything right now. I just want to be alone in silence.”

James let out a sigh as he nodded. “I understand. I will see you at dinner.” He lightly tapped me on my arm and walked away, not saying another word.

I sighed as I sat on a nearby bench, putting my head in my hands. I grasped my hair and pulled on it as I let out another sigh of frustration. A lot has happened and I don’t know how to process everything in such a short amount of time.

“Your Highness?” Gonzalo walked towards me.

I looked up. “Yes, Gonzalo,” I answered.

Gonzalo then handed a letter, folded into a small square. “The messenger just arrived from Middle Earth and has brought this from Princess Lorain.”

“Thank you,” I smiled, receiving the letter. “Has my study been kept in order today?”

“Yes, young prince. Your room and your study haven’t been touched after the recent… events,” he nodded.

I stood up. “Good. I would like to attend to this letter in my study. How’s my sister? Is she still asleep?”

“Yes, Her Highness is still taking her nap.”

I nodded. “Kindly accompany me to the study.”

“Yes, young prince.”

I then led the way, keeping the letter safe in my hand.

♔♔♔

As I sat down in my chair, Gonzalo began to prepare my quill and paper before I wrote a response to Princess Lorain. The letter reads:

To my dearest Robert, By the time you’ve read this letter, I’m quite sure Mother has returned to the kingdom. Allow me to be the one to apologize for her unacceptable behaviour. She’s very welcoming when it comes to other people visiting the castle. However, I’m well-aware that when she visits other kingdoms, it’s an entirely different thing.

I believe she’s acting this way because she’s from a line of royals where they have been utterly superior to other monarchies in the realm. I wouldn’t tell you to get used to her ways but that’s how I deal with her presence.

That’s the treatment she has given my brothers and I ever since we were little. With all honesty, the very reason that I agreed to marrying you is so that I can finally escape the turmoil I’m in under her wing.

I hope she didn’t gravely offend you and your family. I also hope that I would be able to do something to make peace with you and your kingdom if she ever has done anything to offend you.

Until my next letter, waiting for your response.

Your dear friend, Princess Lorain.

A heavy feeling crept up my heart as I folded her letter. She suffered so much from her mother and all I knew was the surface. I can’t imagine living with that kind of person every day. James is rather similar to her mother, but I would choose James rather than Queen Marta.

My dearest Lorain, You don’t have to apologize for your mother’s actions. How she chose to act around other people is her own will and there’s nothing we can do about that. You shouldn’t take the blame for her indecencies.

As your future husband, I have no choice but to understand and bear her. She is, after all, my mother-in-law and your mother. I still have to respect her.

And don’t you worry about your future with me. Once we officially marry, I will make sure that you won’t have to suffer the same darkness that you’re experiencing under her rule. Everything will be taken care of for you. I’ll make sure of it.

Sending you all my love and to your mother, understanding.

Robert.

As I folded the letter and stamped my seal, a knock came on my door.

“Allow me, young prince.” Gonzalo walked to the door and opened it, stepping outside for a moment. After the letter was perfectly sealed, Gonzalo returned to the room, closing the door behind him.

“Who was it?” I asked as he walked back to me.

“It was your page, young prince,” Gonzalo said, his hands behind his back as he stood in front of me. “He said that someone’s looking for you in the stables. She said she knows you and she wanted to talk to you.”

“Please tell Mallory that I’m not interested in talking with her right now.” I then handed over the letter to Gonzalo, “Have the messenger send this to the Middle Earth. Make sure that this letter will land directly to the princess’ and only in her hands.”

“As you wish, young prince. And the girl waiting for you at the stables?” he enquired.

I looked at him, confused. “Gonzalo, I just told you what to tell her.”

“Tell who, sir?”

“Isn’t Mallory the one you’re talking about?” I crossed my arms.

“No, Your Highness. I never mentioned it was Mallory. Mallory has been sent to the marketplace,” he replied.

“If it’s not Mallory then who’s looking for me?” I questioned. “Didn’t my page state any name?”

“According to your page, the girl wouldn’t tell her name. She just kept on insisting that she knows you,” Gonzalo explained.

With a sigh, I stood up and headed to the stables. Gonzalo followed closely behind me, which would be for the best because I’m not sure who else could be looking for me other than Mallory.

♔♔♔

When we arrived at the stables, I couldn’t believe what I was seeing with my eyes. I stayed frozen in my place. My heart raced as the unexpected visitor slowly turned around. It was her. It was Laura, sitting beside Lady. When she saw us arrive, she immediately stood up and bowed in front of me.