Astra stared at her own personal copy of the divorce letter, and the pain still felt the same. Five years down the lane, she still feels so bad for not putting in her best; for not trying to fight hard for her marriage; for not attempting to fight for the love they shared. Maybe she wasn't the problem; perhaps he was. Thankfully, it was starting to sound convincing to her ears. She rarely blamed him all those years; she spent all of those years blaming herself. It was easy to blame herself because she loved him too much. Creating excuses came in a very easy manner, and she hated the way it was easy for her. When they were married, he made sure she didn't think he was doing her a favor by being with her. She was nothing but a poor girl that he fell in love with. He didn't care about what the tabloids thought of them together or what the whole world felt about their union.
He was perfect, and he could have had any girl he wanted, yet he chose to spend forever with her. She never knew what went wrong on their date, but the least she could have done was try to fight for him. Instead, she shut down and switched to alcohol. She still ended up ruining herself and almost losing her life. She almost took her own life with drinking, and she remembered she had no one with her during those days. It was like her own darkest hour with nobody to share it with. At least the person who promised never to leave her side did leave. Nicholas had stared at her in the aisle, and he promised her that he would never go back on his promise. Their wedding was magical, and she could have sworn that it would never end.
She ran her hands through her hair, and she felt at peace. At least the fire didn't ruin her life. When Nicholas divorced her, she felt like her life would be on hold; she wanted nothing but to die. Then the fire happened one night after she passed out from excessive drinking. She didn't know how she got rescued, but she knew when she woke up, she was too broken to stare into the mirror. When her alimony came, she didn't have enough balls to reject it because she would be left to fend alone.
A trip out of the country and facial reconstruction surgery were what it took to restart her life afresh. Moving on wasn't that easy, and every time she was healing, she always found something to push her down that dark lane. However, the memories she shared with Nicholas would always remain with her. She would never forget their first meeting. She was just a young woman, fresh out of college, and she needed a job. She had no one to help, and student loans were driving her crazy.
They had met at a party that she was ushering at. It was an elite party, and she would be earning three times her usual pay for serving drinks at the party. She jumped at the offer and wore her best outfit; she was tired and worn out by the end of the party. She wanted to do nothing but return to the apartment she shared with Julie, her college roommate, and sleep away from her fatigue.
She was sitting by the trunk of the car, and she was almost dozing off while waiting for the cleaning services to do their job. They would leave the venue together, and it would take a whole hour to get back to her apartment. She needs to sleep well enough so she won't feel sleepy on her next shift. Someone approached her and handed her a black silk card, asking her to call the person. The card looked rich, and Astra knew she was about to make it out of the slums. Her head came up with different scenarios of what the man could want, and everything led back to sex. One night with the man would barely hurt anyone.
When they were leaving the venue, she could swear that she felt someone eating her up with his eyes from a nearby limo, but she ignored it. When she got home, she shared the information with Julie, who egged her on and advised her to put a call through to him. When she first called, part of what made her fall in love with him more was his voice. She could vividly remember when he picked up the call. He sounded so confident and sexy that her pants pooled at the sound of his voice.
"I've been expecting your call," he replied before she even had the chance to introduce herself. Her head was spinning in different directions, and she was a blubbering mess. She couldn't form a coherent sentence, and she remembered the way he chuckled at her poor attempt at replying to him.
"How about we do this? I pick you up tomorrow for lunch, and we talk over food." He asked softly, and she nodded her head. She had forgotten that he couldn't see her. He said something else before hanging up, and Astra slid down the wall. This would change her life; she could feel it in her bones. Indeed, it changed her life. Firstly, it brought her good tidings, it upgraded her life and he made her feel like a queen for some time before it shattered her the same way it had elevated her. The backslide was faster because this time she didn't have anyone to hold on to or to help him stay sane.
He had picked her up himself that afternoon, and she spent hours trying to look simple without giving away the fact that she put all her efforts into this with Julie's help. That afternoon, he blew her mind away. She drank in his appearance, and she knew she was sold. He had all the muscles in the appropriate place, and his smell was heavenly. Astra couldn't decipher the strong cologne that reeked of hardwood and something sweet. He smelled manly and sweet at the same time.
"You must be Astra. You look way better when you're near, and I must admit, you look just as celestial as your name". That was the first thing he said to her in his deep baritone voice. Moments after she got into the car with him, the voice was still going off on repeat in her head. The way Astra rolled off his tongue made her feel more beautiful; no, it made her feel more queenly. She loved the feeling. She had no idea where they were going, but her gut trusted him. That turned out to be the best first date she had ever been on. They went on a couple more dates before he took her on vacation.
This vacation sealed their relationship, and it made them official. Before the vacation, he made her move out of the apartment she shared with Julie, and he got her an expensive apartment in the "rich people's vicinity," as she and Julie would call it. He got her a job at his friend's company, and he would drop by too frequently just to see her face. They had a beautiful thing going on, and almost everyone could see it.
Their first night together was memorable, and he made her feel like a queen. It wasn't her first because she had had a couple of boyfriends in college, but it was her most enjoyable one. Sex with Nicholas was something she always looked forward to because there was never a dull moment with him. He would always try out new styles and new positions. He adored consent, and he would always make you the center of the show.
The first time he ate her out was on the beach; it was a private beach, but few people were around. She was lying flat on the mat, enjoying the breeze, when he suddenly brought his mat behind hers. He lay on his mat, bringing his head to her lap. She didn't know he had anything to do, so she thought he was being clingy as usual. He parted her robe slowly before trailing his hands over her laps. She got an idea of what he wanted to do. She tried to move him off, but he wasn't budging. Not like he would listen to his warnings and not do what he had in mind.
If you scream, they will escort us out of here, and we won't be allowed in here anymore. Plus, we will be doing a "walk of shame" back to our suite; I'm not sure you would like that. So the ball is in your court. " He chuckled darkly, and Astra felt hot at the threat. She was a screamer and a squirter; keeping her voice low would be a great challenge, but she was willing to try.
Her phone rang, drawing her attention away from her thoughts, and she slid the hand over the screen to pick up the call. It was her supervisor at work, and she groaned. Her vacation isn't supposed to be over yet, even though she never left her room all through the break. It seems there's an important job waiting for her approval.
"Good morning, Mr. Woltman. How are you doing this morning? " She welcomed him, and the older man replied with enthusiasm. The man had always treated her like his own daughter. Even when she didn't want to practice law anymore, he reminded her why she studied it in the first place. Whenever she lost a case, he was always there to cheer her on. When she came back from her forced sabbatical, she needed a new job. Mr. Woltman had been there for her, and he made her feel better just by smiling at her. He was her father in the firm, even though she didn't tell him that.
"Good morning, Astra. We apologize for interrupting your vacation, but we have a significant case on our hands that the client has specifically requested for you."I think the world won't forget how you helped that little girl get justice. He's willing to pay extra for the trouble of cutting your vacation short. G He would love to meet you personally tomorrow. "Sounds like a solid deal to me," Mr. Woltman said, and Astra sighed. as if she knew that she had a critical case on her hands. She was having mixed feelings about this client who had requested her personally. She just wanted to heal, but if she was being honest with herself, it would take her more than a vacation to heal. Maybe she should go back into the love market and she would have a few flings without strings that might help her take away the hurt. He called her a whore; maybe it was high time she started acting like one. Good girls don't get rewarded; bad girls snatch their own rewards.
"Alright, please forward the details to my email; let me round up things on my end here before the meeting tomorrow," She replied before getting up from the bed and returning the divorce papers to the last drawer of her shelf. She was about to leave her room when Mr. Woltman's following words stopped her. She never expected that to come from him or anyone else. She thought she was finally free from it.
"Mr. Nicholas Michealson would be happy to hear that you've accepted his demands." The man said this without any idea of what his words were doing to Astra. She was shocked, and the alarms went off in her head. Her ex-husband was her new client. She had a whole lot of questions, but her boss had already hung up. She wanted to ask him plenty of things. The fact that Nicholas was making his way back into her life was something that didn't sit well with her. She had worked for months trying to start afresh and be her own person, but here he was trying to ruin everything she had worked hard to keep.