Chapter 79 81

Chapter 79 81
KILLIAN WILDE

I saw him before I saw her.

The man standing far too close, leaning in to point something out on his laptop screen, his hand brushing against her arm like he had every right to touch her that way. My jaw locked instantly, a low growl building somewhere deep in my chest that I had to physically swallow down before it could escape. My wolf stirred, sharp and possessive, clawing at the surface, demanding I do something about the male hovering around what was ours.

Mine.

I forced my eyes back to the ice, back to the drill Coach was running us through, but my focus had already splintered into a dozen different directions. It did not help that barely twenty minutes before puck drop, Nick had pulled me aside in the tunnel, his expression grim in a way that had my stomach dropping before he even said a word.

"Another attack. At us this time around" He had said, voice low so only I could hear. "Eastern border. Rogues, at least a dozen of them this time." He paused, and I could tell from the way his throat worked that whatever came next was not going to be good news. "We lost four. Three more are in critical condition."

Four dead. I had not lost pack members in long, even so since we tightened patrols after the last skirmish. This should not have happened. I had prepared beforehand to handle this and should not have had this casualty but it happened and I was stuck here, skates laced up, expected to play a game while my father held the emergency meeting without me because I could not exactly walk off an NHL rink mid warmup without questions being asked.

"He said to focus on the game and that he would take care of it there." Nick had added. "But the pack members are starting to worry now, and the neighboring Alphas too. The attack against you this time around is worst than they all had. The Alpha King will have questions as well.”

Damn right he would. This has now become like a game of cat and mouse. I should be there taking care of this as the Alpha.

But no, instead I was standing on this ice with my mind splitting itself between grieving wolves I had not even had the chance to mourn yet and the very much alive image of some man leaning far too close to Lara while she laughed at something he had said.

It was not fair, I knew, to let both weigh on me so heavily during a game that required every ounce of my focus, but I could not help it. Every time I looked toward the press box, my eyes betrayed me, finding her there, finding him there beside her, hovering, touching, close enough that a growl kept threatening to slip out at every whistle stoppage.

I missed passes I should have made in my sleep. Turned the puck over twice in our own zone like some rookie who had never stepped foot on ice before. Took a penalty I knew, even as I threw the hit, was reckless and stupid and entirely unlike me, my frustration bleeding out into something physical because I did not know what else to do with it.

By the time the final buzzer sounded, we had lost, badly, and I could not even find it in myself to care the way I normally would.

The locker room was silent when we filed back in, the kind of heavy, thick silence that came from a team who knew better than to poke at an Alpha already teetering on the edge. No one mentioned the score. No one mentioned my performance, the worst I had put out all season. They all simply assumed, correctly for the most part, that my mind was elsewhere, caught up in whatever pack business had pulled Nick away mid warmup, whispering low enough that only wolf hearing could catch it.

What they did not know, or rather, what only a few of them seemed to catch based on the knowing glances exchanged between one another, was that my anger was not purely about the attack.

It was about her too.

About the way that man had looked at her like he had every right to be that close.

I sat at my stall, elbows on my knees, jaw still clenched tight enough to ache, staring at nothing while my teammates changed around me in hushed murmurs. Most of them had grown fond of Lara over the holidays, ever since she had spent Christmas and New Year with us easy laughter and warmth that had made her fit in seamlessly among wolves who did not often warm up to outsiders that fast. They adored her. It made me feel like she would be loved and adored by the other pack members when I finally break the news to her and she knows the truth about us.

Which was exactly why none of them dared say anything when the locker room door opened and she walked in which others dared not like she belonged here, and she does, more than anyone else.

"Hey." She said, offering a small, tired smile as she made her way toward me, weaving between a few of the guys who threw her quick, easy greetings on their way out, clearly sensing the tension rolling off me and choosing wisely to give us space.

Within minutes, the room had emptied out entirely, leaving just the two of us.

She approached slowly, her expression softening with concern as she took in whatever look was still plastered across my face. "Killian?" She reached a hand out, resting it gently against my arm. "Are you okay? That was... that was not like you out there tonight. Did something happen?"

The moment her hand touched me, I felt myself flinch back before I could stop it, the image of that man's hand on her arm flashing behind my eyes all over again.

"Who was that?" I asked, my voice coming out sharper than I intended, colder.

She blinked, clearly caught off guard by the question. "Who was who?"

"The guy in the press box." I clarified, straightening up to look at her properly now, my jaw tight. "The one who could not seem to keep his hands off you all night."

Her expression shifted instantly, confusion melting into something more defensive. "That is Evans. My coworker. We were covering the game together, Killian, you know that."

"He touched you." I said, the words coming out low, almost accusatory. "More than once. I saw it."

"He was pointing things out on the screen." She said, disbelief coloring her tone now, her arms crossing over her chest. "That is what coworkers do when they are working together. Are you seriously doing this right now?"

"I am asking a simple question." My voice rose slightly, frustration from the entire night, the attack, the losses, the ache of not knowing what was happening back home, all of it bleeding into words I could not seem to control. "Forgive me for not loving the sight of another male all over my girlfriend." I wanted to add that she is much more than my girlfriend; that humanly term seemed too small to use in this situation. I wanted to make it clear that she is my mate, my other half, the most important person to me that seeing another man around her brings out my most feral side.

"Your girlfriend. That is all I am, and we both know this is not meant to last for long." She repeated, something flashing across her face, hurt tangled up with anger now and I scoffed at her words. "Funny how you only remember to call me that when you are feeling insecure about some imaginary thing that did not even happen."

"Imaginary?" I scoffed, pushing up from the bench now, standing to my full height though she did not so much as flinch. "I watched it happen, Lara. All game. And the fuck do you mean this won’t last long? Is that what you view our relationship as? Something temporary? So this is all fleeting to you?" I was starting to thinka fter this much time she has warmed up to this, to us.

Then perhaps it would be easier to break the news of who I really am to her. But apparently not.

“Don’t you dare spin and try to make me the villain here.” She warned equally, not backing down. "You were distracted the entire game, that much was obvious to everyone watching, and you want to blame it on me and Evans?" Her voice cracked slightly, disbelief and hurt warring together. "Do you even hear yourself right now?"

"I am simply saying maybe you should watch how comfortable you let other men get with you. Or maybe you are just preparing for my replacement for when you leave me huh? How long has this been going on even?" The words left my mouth before I could stop them, poison laced through every syllable, and I watched, almost in slow motion, as her expression shattered.

"Wow." She said quietly, stepping back from me like I had physically struck her. "Okay. Wow."

"Lara."

"No." She held up a hand, shaking her head, her eyes glassy now, though she blinked furiously to keep whatever tears were threatening from actually falling. "I do not need this right now. I do not need you accusing me of something I did not do because you had a bad night."

She turned before I could get another word out, grabbing her bag off the bench and storming toward the door, her shoulders squared, refusing to look back at me even once.

"Lara, wait." I called after her, but she was already gone, the door swinging shut behind her with a finality that echoed through the empty locker room.

I stood there for a long moment, the anger slowly bleeding out of me, replaced by something far heavier, far worse.

Regret.

What had I done?