Chapter Fifty-One

Steam rose all around me as I settled into the tub, sinking into the fragrant water and leaning back until my head rested against a folded towel. If I closed my eyes, I could almost imagine being able to fully relax and enjoy this. I could almost pretend our lives weren't in jeopardy yet again.

The water was miraculous, soothing the tightness in my muscles almost on contact. Nothing, not even the longest run I’d ever done in track, had ever left me with this all-over exhaustion, this sense of my body turning into a giant knot of tension.

I forced a few deep breaths, blowing them out slowly.

In the separate shower stall, Aimes was busy scrubbing himself down. He had already been in there for as long as it took to fill the tub, and through the steam billowing out over top of the glass door, I could see him soaping up another clean washcloth to do the job again.

Was that the first time he'd ever been in a dungeon cell? For once, I had more experience with something than he did.

My heart swelled as I watched him. My mate. It felt so right, so natural.

All I wanted was to be able to spend time with him, to do all the things new couples were supposed to do. Okay, so maybe I had never been part of a real couple before this, but I had seen and read enough of them to know there was a whole honeymoon phase, even when a couple wasn’t actually married. When everything was new and exciting and fresh, when all that mattered was being together.

And here we were, spending our early days locked up again. At least we were allowed to be together, in the same room I’d been in the last time I was at the mansion for the Full Moon Games. If we were held separately, this would be so much worse.

“Hey, don’t fall asleep in there and drown on me,” Aimes said as he got out of the shower while toweling off.

I couldn't help but watch as he did, how the water droplets slid down each groove of his eight-pack, how his tattooed skin gleamed in the light.

Another kind of hunger stirred inside me, and I knew it had to be my wolf reacting to his. She was still in there, just buried deep down thanks to whatever layers of protection Connolly thought he needed to place around the mansion.

One day soon, there had to come a time when I'd be able to sit down and make sense of all of this. My dual nature. My new hungers. How to balance them with normal, everyday life. I couldn't go around humping my mate all day and night, could I? No matter how interesting an idea that was…

“Need some help?” he asked, draping the towel around his waist and tucking it in at one hip.

It was low enough that I could see the V-shaped ridge of muscles leading down to his sparkle cock. Maybe it would have been better if I had taken a cold bath, come to think of it.

I sat up and held out a washcloth which he poured body wash onto before running it over my back.

“I feel her,” he murmured as he washed me up. “Do you? Your wolf.”

I craned my neck to look up at him. “Yeah, she’s in there. What, did you feel her just now when I was checking you out?”

“You mean while I was checking you out?” He grinned, slow and beautiful, and my body glowed at the power of it.

“Yeah, probably.” I leaned in for a quick kiss before drawing my knees to my chest and wrapping my arms around my legs. “How am I supposed to do what Annecy wants me to do when I can't even reach my wolf?”

“One thing at a time. You need sleep and food. Maybe once we both get some rest, this won't seem so impossible.”

“Do you honestly believe that?”

“Eh, better ask me later,” he said with a smirk.

My skin was starting to prune, so we finished the washing quickly. By the time I stood, the water draining from the tub, Aimes was holding out a big, fluffy towel. Without asking for help, he squeezed the water from my hair, then went to work drying me off. Rather than sexual, his touch was more sensual, gentle, tender, like he was taking care of me the only way he could at that moment.

And I loved him for it even more.

Once he was finished, I wrapped my arms around him and rested my cheek against his firm chest.

“I don't know what I would do if I didn't have you right now,” I whispered.

“You'll never have to figure that out.” He pressed his lips against the top of my head and held me closer.

I smiled because that was exactly the right thing to say.

By the time we stepped out of the bathroom, there was a tray of food waiting on a table by the barred window.

“Oh, thank god.” I barged toward it like the Kool-Aid man, picked up a huge sandwich, and sank my teeth into it without even checking to see what was inside. Grilled chicken, bacon, cheese. “It's normal food,” I marveled through a mouthful, relieved.

“We don't always eat the way we did during the Full Moon Games,” Aimes explained while taking a huge bite of his own sandwich. “That was mostly for show.”

“Let me guess. Connolly.”

He nodded. “I mean, if all we ate was raw meat, we could never survive out in the human world. We sort of have to adapt.” He took another bite and closed his eyes while a groan of pure bliss rumbled in his chest. “Man, I love bacon. I can't tell you the last time I had it.”

“Me too,” I sighed.

I wanted to savor every bite, but I was too hungry. There were other things, too. Salad, fruit, and those monster cookies loaded with M&Ms and chocolate chips that had, like, one calorie each. Uh-huh, sure, Harlow. If I told myself that enough times, it would totally be true.

We demolished every last bite in record time, but I didn't feel remotely full. I should’ve been stuffed after a meal like that, but I only wished I had a second sandwich and another plate or two of monster cookies.

Aimes grinned while I licked my fingers clean. “Now that you have your wolf, you'll eat more than you used to. Another thing about those banquets Connolly threw during the Full Moon Games. I guarantee you every single one of those girls was starving, but they all wanted to look good for Stride.”

“But I don't have my wolf. Not right now.”

“She's awake, inside you. Your metabolism has changed. And you've been through a lot. It's not exactly like either of us has had a good amount of food since—”

“Room service in our hotel,” I concluded bitterly.

Which had been only yesterday, but still.

“That's what I was going to say.” A dreamy smile flitted over his face, like he was remembering a lot more than just the food.

Which, yeah. Same. If only we could’ve stayed there forever.

I reached across the table and took his hand. “She's going to kill us both, isn’t she?”

“We're not going to let that happen. I am not going to let that happen.” He ran his thumb over the backs of my knuckles, calming my raging emotions some.

“I don't know if I can kill Connolly,” I admitted. “I don't know if I have it in me.”

He tilted his head and fixed me with those bottomless azure eyes of his, framed with impossibly long, thick lashes. “In the end, I know you'll do what's right.”

“But how do you know? I wish I had that much faith in myself.” I got up and paced at the foot of the big, elaborate bed. There was so much nervous energy in me, I practically vibrated with it. “Is there ever going to be a day when I don't feel like the whole fate of the world is on my shoulders?”

“To hell with the world.” He crossed his arms and sat back in his chair, his expression hardening. “I'm more worried about you.”

“I’m not a killer, Aimes,” I said, still pacing. “I cried so hard when my goldfish, Glitter, died after I was two hours late to feed it. I still blame myself.”

“This happened when you were little?”

“No, last year. Damn flat tire.”

I didn’t care how childish that made me sound, especially in front of him. Yes, I fought hard, but I loved even harder.

I turned away, my eyes stinging. “I hate talking about it, because whenever I do, some secret ninja sneaks in and starts chopping onions.”

“Oh,” he said softly and then rose to wrap his arms around me. “I’m sorry about Glitter and all the ninjas with their onions.”

“Thanks,” I whispered, blinking away my tears.

“Come on,” he said with a soft sigh in his voice. “Lie down with me?”

Nodding, I let him lead me toward the bed. How lucky was I that my mate was a decent, understanding person? There I was, fresh off of finding out my dad was basically a monster, and Aimes understood that I just needed to cuddle for a while.

It could so easily have gone the other way. He could’ve been rough and brutal and forcing me into having sex with him, like Stride, only interested in getting what he wanted instead of caring about what I needed. I hadn't asked for any of this, but I could at least admit to myself how much worse it could’ve been and how much I had to be grateful for.

Like this bed, so big and soft that it was like sinking into a cloud.

“Oh my God,” I moaned, stretching with a happy groan before snuggling deep under a pile of blankets. “I forgot how good this bed feels, especially after a night in the dungeon.”

“Yeah.” Aimes settled in next to me, sighing when his head hit the pillow. “Damn, that settles it. We’re never getting up again.”

He drew me close, pulling me to him until my head was tucked under his chin. A sense of calm washed over me, peace, my wolf content. I might not have been able to reach her, but I could still feel her, and she was happy. So was I, even if I was more than a little irritated with her for flaking out on me.

But just then, being with him was enough, and the bed more than helped soothe me.

“We're going to get through this,” Aimes whispered, stroking my hair.

“I know.”

“And it's going to be okay in the end.”

“I know.”

He chuckled like he didn't quite believe me, like he knew I was only agreeing to make him feel better. “You know a lot of things, don't you? You know I love you, right?”

Smiling, I snuggled even closer. “I do know that.”

“And you know I'm never going to leave your side, right?”

“Yes, I know that too.” I lifted my head to brush his lips with mine.

“Well, then, that's as good a start as anybody can hope for.”

I knew he was right, and I silently thanked whoever was watching over us for giving me someone I could trust, someone I could rely on to help me get through this.

Though a few answers would’ve been nice too.

For now, all I wanted was sleep, and it pulled me under within seconds of me closing my eyes. We fell asleep that way, wrapped up in each other in every way possible.

* * *

That night, I dreamed I was standing in the middle of a clearing, one where a circle of angry men and women dressed in fine clothes glared menacingly at a figure in the center. I sensed their outrage, their hatred, the moonlight revealing their menacing expressions.

When I turned to the person they stared at, I understood why. He was younger, a lot younger, but I would know that haughty expression anywhere. The way he held himself like he was so much better than everybody else. Like they were lucky to be in his presence.

Connolly, with a full moon spotlighting him.

“You knew the dangers of the Moon pack,” the largest of the men shouted. “I can feel their filthy witch curses on you. And now it’s on us. You leave me no choice but to banish you from our pack.”

Connolly shook his head. “Brother, I—”

“Stop,” the man shouted. “You are no longer the Alpha, and I am no longer your brother.”

It was Darrion, Aimes’s adoptive dad, Connolly’s brother, the same one he eventually murdered.

The vision faded, replaced with another one. I looked around, surrounded by darkness, slimy stone under my feet, a chill in the air.

Then, in front of me, a face materialized in the window of a heavy wooden door. The woman on the other side was looking at me. Not through me, not at somebody else behind me. She saw me. She knew me.

She looked just like me.