Yzabelle.
Killian’s eyes went to my things. I saw panic painted across his face.
“What is the meaning of this? Where are you going?” he sounded angry, his eyes were flaming when he realized I was about to go. “Are you going with him? Is that why he was waiting in the lobby?”
Oh? So, they met at the lobby. I was surprised they didn’t seem to argue or else, Corbin must be following Killian up here.
“You’re not coming with him, you hear me? You’ll stay with me. You weren’t safe anywhere away from me,” he demanded, angrily.
My palm swung across his face. It’s too late to realize that I slapped him.
I didn’t entirely want to slap him. Half of me wanted to let it slide, but the other half of me was too intense, too angry, and very much hurting.
Killian was too stunned to react.
“How dare you?” I roared. “You want me dead and now, you were pretending to be concerned about me?”
“Yzabelle, you don’t understand, I—”
“What else to understand, ‘Your Highness’?” I emphasized the last two words. “If not for Corbin, I must be dead by now! And you were saying I wasn't safe anywhere away from you? Hah!” I shook my head in disbelief. “I wasn’t crazy enough to stay one more minute inside your house.”
“No, Yzabelle, please. I don’t mean that. It’s hard to explain but that guy wasn’t me,” he tried to explain. I frowned at it. I was sure it was him. I felt the same powerful pull. “Well, technically it was me, but I wasn’t him,” Killian seemed to be having a hard time explaining.
And I really didn’t understand anything he said.
I sighed and decided to step away from him.
Killian went desperate, he suddenly pulled me by the arm and it was too late when I realized what he wanted to do.
He cupped my nape, pulled me towards him, and claimed my mouth. I was too dumbfounded to even move. And the fact that I was unable to control myself, I let him.
I let his wet and warm kisses take the lead.
His tongue parted my teeth, delved in and out of my mouth, exploring and sucking and playing. I was nearly drowning in this wild and passionate sensation that his kisses brought me. He suddenly released me and gazed at my lips with hunger… great hunger. Then he claimed it again. This time, the kiss was wilder, hungrier, crazier.
His one hand moved to my tummy, crawling above. I could even feel my nipples growing hard against the soft fabric of my brassier. They were craving to be touched, to be sipped, to be loved.
I was nearly losing my sanity when I finally got a hold of myself. I used all my strength to push him away. I felt like crying right now. And I did.
It was not because he kissed me. It was because I was a hypocrite. I loved the kiss, my body automatically reacted to his touch.
But that was not right.
He wanted to kill me and yet I wanted him to pull me right to his bed.
That’s ridiculous! Way, way ridiculous!
Killian looked at me with both raging need and great confusion.
“What’s wrong?” he asked.
I bit my lower lip and held myself from breaking down.
“You’re an asshole!” I silently hissed. “You’re asking me what’s wrong? Hah! Do you think a kiss will be enough to atone everything?” I shook my head without losing eye contact.
I wanted to see his reaction. And I think that was a wrong decision. I only got more confused seeing him confused as I was. He had the same reaction when he was about to sway his sword in front of me.
“I didn’t intend to do that, Yzabelle. Believe me.”
Part of me wanted to believe him. But a big part of me couldn't ignore what I witnessed.
I blew a hard breath. “And what do you want me to think? That you were possessed back there? Oh, please, kill me now. You could never be possessed when you are a royalty shapeshifter, Killian.”
“Yzabelle, please. You don’t understand. You misinterpreted all of it!” he hissed back at me.
He seemed to grow impatient. None that I cared about.
“Then make me understand, Killian. Tell me what’s going on.” I dared him.
He went silent. And his silence just hurt me big time. I pursed my lips together. I let my tears roll down my cheeks.
“I could not be with someone who couldn’t straighten his mind. One moment he wanted to protect me, to love me. But the next, he wanted to kill me. Can’t you be a man and tell me what you really wanted to do with me?”
He still didn’t answer. He just stared at me. And I knew it.
He could not answer because he knew the answer would hurt me.
I shook my head in disappointment. My eyes continued working on tears. That’s enough, I didn’t want to break into pieces in front of him.
I quickly turned away and left. Good thing he didn’t move and made an effort to stop me.
Ugh! No.
I didn’t know if it could be considered a good thing. Because either way, I was hurting.
If only he decided to deny it, I would believe it. If he said it was just a dream and none of those things happened tonight, I would still choose to believe him. I would still accept him. I would still decide to stay with him.
But he neither admitted nor denied it.
No, he silently admitted it. His silence was considered a loud answer already. It was just me who kept on denying it to myself.
I was still hoping that everything wasn’t real. I was still hoping that after tonight we could go back to normal.
But what was the normal setup for me again? Since the day I met Killian, I didn’t know which one was supposed to be the normal thing to do. I admitted, I already loved our setup. Maybe, I did not want to open up about the original plan of breaking our families' arrangements.
But it was a different thing now.
I couldn’t live with him anymore.
I could not be anywhere near him anymore.
It was the longest and farthest walk to the elevator in my entire stay in this tower building. I could not be any more relieved when I finally got in.
And as I traveled down the lobby, my tears kept on coming. This time, my eyes were like two big dams of water, continuously gushing out tears.