Laura.
Saskia looked straight into my eyes. The way she looked at me, she didn’t want to throw the answer right away. I knew she wanted to check on me. That’s what she always did whenever I came to her.
I could see she felt sorry for me and the sympathy she was showing me made me feel a bit pitiful.
And I didn’t like it. The last thing I wanted was to pity myself.
“It’s painful right? Some werewolves who got rejected wanted to end their life because of so much pain and suffering. I witnessed a lot of that. They were really heartbroken.”
“Oh?” I frowned and secretly checked on myself. “Aren’t you just exaggerating things? I don’t feel that bad. I felt so down and all but I am not a suicidal case just like what you mentioned.”
“Really?” Saskia inched forward and pointed to my chest, to the center. “Does it hurt here?”
“A bit,” I shrugged. “At first it’s really painful but not the pain that I would want to end my life. I actually wanted to change my fate, why would I end my life then?”
“Well, that was one of the two ways.”
My eyes widened in shock. I turned to her to have a better view of her face and her reaction.
“Are you serious?!” I exclaimed.
“Absolutely,” she answered nonchalantly.
“Then how can I change my fate if I am going to take my life?”
“You’ll be reborn. And time knows when. Maybe after a hundred years or two.”
I fell into deep thinking. I already had an awesome set of parents and I loved them so much. If I was going to be reborn, I wanted them to be my parents again. But the Guardians and Salutary of our pack warned my Mom that she was not able to conceive a pup after giving birth to me. That was also the reason why they were too protective of me. I was their first and last pup. And if I was going to die, I didn’t know how Mom and Dad would accept it. And I am certain, they would never be my parents in my next life. I didn’t want that to happen!
“You said you know two ways, right? What is the other one?” I eagerly asked Saskia.
Saskia gave me a lasting gaze. She gave up and sighed. “Messing with time.”
“Huh?”
“That’s the second way to change your fate. You have to mess up with time," she said. "You can go back to the past and figure out what went wrong. Why can't you shift? Or you can go forward to the future and see what happens to you so you can avoid misfortunes and change your future.”
I ran out of words even though I had a lot of questions inside my head. I knew Saskia wouldn’t suggest it if she didn’t know how. But… was I ready to mess with time? What if things didn't go as I planned?
Ah!
Too many negative thoughts. I should not think that way, right? If I really wanted to change my fate, I should take all the chances that came my way.
Yeah! That’s it. I must grab every opportunity that came! And this was the opportunity that Saskia laid in front of me. All I needed to know was what the consequences were. So I could plan ahead.
I faced Saskia. “How am I going to do that? Am I really able to travel through time?”
“I won’t tell you that if it’s not possible.”
My heart steadied with relief.
Well, she was right. Why would I ask such an obvious question though?
“Then how?” I even leaned forward, making sure I would be able to hear every single word she said. I didn’t want to miss anything, even the way she breathed.
“I can make a portal, back and forth. You must decide what time you want to go. Is it in the past or in the future? I can only make one. We must wait a hundred years to make another portal.”
Too risky, isn’t it?
I sighed.
I must pick one.
The future or the past?
If I chose the future, could I really change my fate? I was already eighteen and still not shifting. I was certain I could no longer shift. Even half-blood werewolves shifted at eighteen and that was definitely the latest time where one would turn into a wolf.
What else should I change in my future? This was the end of my battle. I was sure I was still an Omega in the future.
But if I chose the past, I could figure out when things went wrong and why I couldn’t shift. Maybe something wrong happened while Mom was pregnant with me. What if her blood was contaminated with something while she was pregnant? Or maybe an eclipse happened at their mating time. Or if it was mating season, maybe they made a wrong position.
Should I ask them what position they had when they were trying to conceive me?
Argh! That was crazy! I was crazy!
I saw Saskia holding back her laughter beside me.
Gosh! Did she also read my mind?
Ugh! Certainly.
I could feel my cheeks burning in embarrassment. I just didn’t know what to think anymore.
If I went back to the past, I would have all the time in the world to follow them, right?
I was going to approach Alpha Evo to include me in his pack so it would be easy to linger around Mom and Dad. I would ask Saskia to bring me back to the time when Dad and Mom were trying to conceive a baby. From what I knew, they were eighteen back then when they found each other. I could act like a friend to Mom and give her tips.
Darn!
Tips my ass!
What the hell did I know?
I didn’t even know how they were doing it. I didn’t even know how it felt to be kissed.
But I must do it no matter what.
I must decide now. I must choose to travel in time.
But before I could breathe a word, Saskia intervened.