Chapter 123. FIONA

Chapter 123. FIONA
I stuffed one last item into the suitcase before closing it and pushing it into the corner of the room. The twenty-five-inch suitcase slid swiftly against the wall and hit it hard. The thud echoed throughout the nearly empty room.
This room would be sorely missed. I had so many memories here with Melissa, especially from when she was a baby.
Tears welled up in my eyes as I saw the bed, wardrobe, and dresser, all covered in white sheets.
“You’re here.”
“Hi, Scott.”
I roughly wiped away the tears that were streaming down my cheeks. I had promised Scott not to cry in front of him.
But I couldn’t hold back the next tear that rolled down my cheek as I saw Scott walking toward me.
“Are you done putting my clothes in the suitcase?”
“Yes. Your suitcase is over there.”
“Appreciate it. Why are you crying? I'm not even crying, even though I'm leaving this house for good and moving to a nursing home."
I stared at Scott intently before hugging him. More tears streamed down my cheeks. I wasn't ready to say goodbye to Scott.
“This house holds so many memories. Are you sure you want to sell it?”
“If I weren’t sure, I wouldn’t be packing all my things and preparing to move into a nursing home today. Besides, the real estate agent already found a buyer for this house. They’re a small family with parents and two toddlers. They’ll be moving in next week.”
“You can stay at my house, then. We have a spare room for you.”
Scott gently stroked the top of my head.
“I don't want to be a burden in your life.”
“No. You’re not a burden to us. I just can’t cook as well as Lea.”
Scott chuckled softly at my joke. This time, he looked older than his years. He’d lost the spark in his life after Lea died. I could understand that. It was hard for Scott to accept, even though he'd always said he was done grieving Lea's death.
But that was bullshit. I noticed Scott’s eyes were puffy yesterday and this morning. He still couldn’t let go of Lea’s shadow. He said he had successfully ended his thirty-five-year FBI career on a high note, while many of his peers had died in the line of duty. But he lost Lea after he had survived numerous assassination attempts during his time with the FBI.
“Moving to a nursing home is the best decision. I love you both,” Scott looked at me with teary eyes.
“But it will be hard for me to move on if I live with you. I need a new environment with new friends to forget the bitterness of the past. And I hope you can forget your own bitterness someday, too.”
“I’m fine.”
Scott shook his head slowly.
“You’re not fine, Fiona. You have unresolved issues with Mellisa’s father, right?”
“We’ve always had problems,” I quickly denied.
I turned my face to the window, watching Mellisa and Clio having fun on the swing. Their laughter was so crisp. Mellisa screamed loudly every time Clio pushed the swing hard and it soared high into the air. But my girl was happy and always asked Clio to do it. I envied their joy. That damn man had ruined all my joy four years ago with his jerkishness.
“Mellisa told me that you and Joshua had a fight two days ago. You were yelling at each other in front of her.”
“My little girl always tells you everything,” I sneered.
“Even though she’s just a child, she can sense the tension between her parents. What happened to you and Joshua?”
“That doesn’t matter now. Mellisa and I won’t see him again.”
“He's her father. Yeah, even though I don't like him. If I were you, I wouldn't be so cruel. I wouldn't separate Melissa from her father. Especially since they've only just bonded. Melissa said she misses him.”
I knew. Melissa had said that hundreds of times since I took her away from Joshua's house that night. My little girl kept begging to see her daddy, but I kept telling her he was busy.
“He disappointed me, Scott. Joshua was a bad influence on Mellisa’s life. He tortured and killed one of his enemies in front of her. You know how hard I tried to keep Mellisa away from the dark side of Joshua’s life, right? I gave him the opportunity to bond with her while I was working on a case in Mexico. He should have used that opportunity to show his good side to her, not to show his brutality in front of a three-year-old girl.”
I spoke with passion. I had been holding back my anger for two days.
“I have no idea what was going through Joshua's mind at that time. He can’t be a good father to Mellisa.”
“How did Mellisa react?”
“What?”
“What happened to Mellisa after she saw her father kill her enemy in front of her? Was she traumatized? Was she hysterical?”
I just stared at Scott silently. He knew I couldn’t answer his question because none of the things he mentioned happened to Mellisa.
“Is she okay?”
“But—”
“Did you try to listen to his explanation before deciding to take Mellisa away?”
I shook my head slowly.
That night, I intended to surprise Mellisa and Joshua. I hadn't told them I'd returned from Mexico. I couldn't wait to tell Joshua the details of my case that I'd been keeping from him. I was so happy with the success of my case that I heard gunshots from the garage. I got out of the car in a hurry. My mind was in turmoil. I was afraid the same thing that happened at my house would happen again. But I was so shocked to find Joshua had just shot and killed a man while holding Mellisa.
"Do I need to listen to his explanation when everything is so clear?"
"Yes, you have. There must be a reason why Joshua did that. Moreover, Mellisa is fine. I believe she's a strong and tough girl. She's fine after seeing Lea and me shot right in front of her."
"But I don't want Mellisa to be exposed to those terrible things again. I want to keep her away from violence and blood."
"You can't keep her from that. She's the daughter of a mobster. Joshua's blood flows in her veins. Mellisa has been a part of those terrible things since she was in your womb."
“I want Joshua to act like a normal father in front of Mellisa.”
“How long?”
“What?” I stared at Scott in a daze.
“How long do you want Joshua to pretend to be someone else in front of Mellisa? Lies hurt, even if they seem beautiful. It’s better for Mellisa to know who her real father is.”
“But Scott—”
“No. You have to listen to me. Life isn’t perfect, no matter how hard you try to make it. You have to learn to accept reality. It will reduce stress. You’ll enjoy life more. Trust me.”
I nodded slowly.
“I believe you.”
“Give him a chance.”
“I don’t know. I’ve given him plenty of chances.”
“What do you expect from him, huh? You expect him to become a refined man overnight, when no one is guiding him in that direction? It’ll never happen. You shouldn’t have abandoned him when he was starting to change for you and Mellisa.”
“Scott…” I groaned in annoyance.
“Whose side are you really on? Why are you defending him now?”
“I’m not defending anyone. I’m just stating the facts. He’ll be lost forever if you don’t guide him on the right path.”
This deep talk was shit, but it gave me a new perspective. It was hard to admit that Scott was right, and I was wrong all along.
“It’s too late. I told him to stay away from us.”
“Don’t worry. Love will find its way.”
I gaped at Scott before lightly punching his shoulder.
“You’re an agent, not a poet.”
“Former agent. Now I’m free to be whatever I want. And I guess being a poet isn’t so bad.”
“Yikes. That’s disgusting.”
“That’s good. Just try to do what I tell you.”
“I make no promises.”
Suddenly, Mellisa and Clio burst into Scott’s room. They were screaming and laughing out loud. Mellisa ran towards me. I caught her and hugged her.
“Hey, are you having fun with Aunt Clio?”
“She’s going to eat me. Aunt Clio is being an evil monster.”
“I’m going to eat you, little girl.”
“No, you can’t eat me. Daddy will protect me from evil monsters like you. Right, Mom?”
“Uh…”
I was stunned by her words. My tongue was numb and I couldn’t answer.
"Daddy said he'd always protect me no matter what. I'm Lident. I'll be as brave as him."
Scott smiled beside me. He must have known what I was thinking. Mellisa adored her father more than anything. Joshua was a villain, but he was a superhero in her eyes.
“Mommy, when will I see Daddy?”
Scott and I looked at each other.
“Your Daddy’s busy.”
“Can I call him?”
“Umm... I don’t think you can call him.”
“Daddy’s busy punishing those evil monsters, huh?”
“I guess so.”
Mellisa rested her head on my chest and hugged me tightly.
“Don’t yell at Daddy anymore. Please. Daddy’s so nice. He bought me new dresses and played with my bunny.”
Scott shot me a blaming look, while Clio seemed clueless. She looked back and forth between Mellisa and me, then back at Scott.
“I feel like I’ve missed something exciting. Can someone explain what’s going on?”
By the end of the day, Clio remained clueless. Neither Scott nor I tried to explain the situation to her. We decided to put my issues with Joshua aside and focus on Scott’s move to the nursing home.
We delivered him safely to the nursing home. We stayed until dinner because I had planned to have dinner with Scott and his new friends. I bought some pizza and burgers for them. I was relieved that Scott had found a new environment he wanted. I hoped I would have the peace he had someday.