MITCHEL.

I had spend the best week of my life and now that it wascoming to an end, I was getting bored. Ben and I had been given a one week off work after we came back from Paris. Paris had been tiring and thus the off and bonus we received and covered it all. I had decided to spend the week covering up my missing Jason's party and it had been fun. I had bought him a lot of presences from Paris which he opened as soon as I arrived, we had gone to his favourite restaurant, visited the beach over the weekend, gone to the park and stayed up late watching all kinds of cartoon. Ivy had joined us through everything. I had brought back jewelry and perfume for her and she had loved them.

I had also enjoyed the week because for once since I started working at Richmond Enterprise, I wasn't being called every now and then and given orders by Nate. I was missing work but the thought of seeing Nate again was not something that I was taking pleasure in. I was still angry with him after what he did but also I was happy that I got to spend a week with my son, a huge bonus and a free trip to Paris. So as much as I wanted to hate him I couldn't hate him completely. It was on a Sunday evening and I was currently on the sofa watching another episode of Tom and jerry with Jason at the middle and Ivy on the other end. We had all types of snacks with us and were having ablast.

After the movie and dinner, I take Jason to bed and tuck him in.

“Did you enjoy the week baby?“ I ask.

“I did mum. I loved it. Thank you for the best week ever.“ He says enthusiastic.

“Your welcome baby. I couldn't just work or sleep when you are around. I love you baby.“

“I love you too mom.“ He replies. “Are you going back to work tomorrow mom?“

“Yes I am baby. My off is done I need to go back to work.“

“Ooh okay. I will miss you.“

“I will always come back every night and we will see each other.“

“ I know but I'll still miss you.“

“ I'll miss you too.“ I say finally kissing his forehead.

“By the way mom, umm, I wanted to ask you something. And please don't be mad.“ He says sounding unsure of himself.

“Of course baby what is it? I won't be mad.“

“You promise?“

“I promise, come one what is it?“

“Pinky promise?“

“Yes. Pinky promise.“ I reasure.

“Umm, will I ever meet my dad, mom?“ He asks.

My heart beat raises and even though I knew this day would come, I didn't know it would come today or this early on. I look at his little expectant eyes looking at me and how he trusts me.

“I don't know baby, maybe you will meet him one day. I just don't know when or how but you will one day.“ I say reassuringly.

“Why did he leave me? He didn't love me or was I not cute enough for him?“ He asks and I can feel the hurt in his voice.

“Noooo baby, you dad didn't know when you were conceived because he was taken away from us before he knew. He would have loved you if he had met you baby just like I love you so much. He would have given up everything if he knew you were in this world. Okay?“ He nods. “So don't you ever think that your dad left because he didn't want you, he just had a tough time and he was taken away.“ I explain trying my vest to be understood by him.

“Okay mommy.“ He says.

“What made you ask that baby?“ I ask curious to know what had happened for him to be this curious.

“Umm, it's just that a couple of my friends at school have been dropped by their dads and they look happy and so I just wanted to know mommy.“ He explains.

I gather him into my arms and hug him tight.“ It will be okay baby, mommy's got you. Okay? And I love you daily and so so much.“ I say reassuringly.

He nods and says, “I love you too mommy so much.“ I kiss him and lay him back down.

I can feel Jason's questions ring in my head over and over again and I am deafened on what to do. I didn't see it coming at all after everything I have done to shield him from the unfortunate feeling of not being wanted or loved. But somehow I knew I would have that talk with him and now I wasn't sure if I was doing the right thing hiding him from his father.

“He just asked about his dad.“ I say to Ivy just as I settle back into the sofa. She had cleared the table and the floor and it was better than I had left it.

“And what did you tell him?“ She asks.

“Kind of the truth.“ I tell her what I told Jason and she doesn't say anything for a minute.

“So, what are you going to do about it. Will you tell Nate about Jason or Jason about Nate?“ She asks and I am not sure what to replie because somehow I think I want to tell one of them the truth about it.

“I don't know. I can't tell Nate he is a ceo of a Company owned by his grandfather meaning he is rich and if I bring up my son and our relationship, I'll be told I want money, also if he finds out I have his son he might want custody I don't want that. I can't tell Jason his father is here also he will want to meet him.“ I say.“ I can't risk loosing my son just because he wants a relationship with his father.“

“I know but eventually he will k owing a out Jason, what then? What will be your excuse then?“ She asks.

“I don't know but I might just decide to move away and start a fresh before he knows it. Or just tell him and explain myself. Besides he was the one who left not me how was I supposed to tell him about Jason when he blocked me everywhere and left. I have brought Jason up alone and I think I'll continue to do the same.“ I replie.

“Whatever you choose I am here for you.“

We hug and then, “okay now tell me about Mr. Hot guy from the club, what happened?“ I ask.

“Ooh yeah I didn't tell you, he took me out to dinner last week and did I have a blast.“ She goes on to tell me everything they did with her hot guy and all I do is listen and chime in whenever needed avoiding judgement or giving her advice. She doesn't like advice and would prefer to make her own choices and mistakes.

Nights like these with my bestfriend are the nights I always enjoy the most. Sitting down, eating and talking about men and everything they do. I crave nights like these, nights where I can finally be who I wanna be without fear of being judged by another knowing very well my bestie has got my back. But my mind keeps drifting to the conversation I have had with both her and Jason and I somehow feel defeated by it.

I have yet to come up with a solution to what i have on my plate and as I lay in bed my mind drifts to the one man that had my heart once, Nate. He was my everything. I would walk right into hell with him if he had let me hold his hand.

“Hey babe I have a suprise for you.“ Nate said one valentines day.

“You didn't have to baby, I thought we said no gifts.“ I say turning away from the counter to face him, I find him looking at me with a beautiful grin on his face. He looked at me like I hung the moon, like I was the last brightest star in the sky. I could see it in his eyes only that he loved me.

“I know but you are the love of my life, I couldn't just not give you anything.“ He says handing me a small gift box. I open it and lying there is a necklace.

“Baby, it's beautiful. Thank you.“ I say hugging and kissing him. I can feel tears in my eyes threatening to fall.

“Let me help you put it on.“ He says taking the necklace and putting it on me.

It's a pearl necklace with two butterflies attached to it. “I love it baby. Thank you.“ I say turning to him and kissing him deeply.

I pull away from him and continue to look at my necklace.

“I also got you something.“ I say getting out of his hold to get his gift.

“And I thought we weren't getting gifts.“ He says chuckling.

“I know but I saw it and I thought of you and I couldn't let it pass, so yeah I bought it.“ I say handing him a gift box also.

He opens it and at first he doesn't react at all and I am afraid he will hate it but then, “wow, where did you get it. I have always wanted one of these.“he says taking the Tungsten ring and examining it.

“I saw it at the mall the other day and I bought it for you.“ I explain taking it and putting it on his finger. It fits perfectly and as I admire, he pulls me closer to him and smashes our lips together in a bruising kiss. “Thank you baby, I love it and I love you.“ He declares kissing me again.

“Happy valentines baby.“ I say when we finally break apart.

“Happy valentines babe.“ He replies before sealing our lips again.

But even with all that I could never understand why he left me just like that without a good bye or even a letter explaining why. He looked at me with love especially that one night where he made love to me like his life depended on it. He looked into my eyes and professed his love but the next day he was gone. Never to be seen again. And now he was constantly around me but I couldn't never look at him the same. He left me and now it was my turn.