Chapter 50
Roman had the beef simmering, water boiling in a pot for the pappardelle and the red wine already breathing on the table when Evelyn walked tentatively into the kitchen.
He met her gaze and knew she hadn't yet decided what she was going to do. Her arms were wrapped around herself and she still looked like she was going to run out of the house at any moment.
He had to do something to make her stay.
But what the hell was he supposed to do? How could he make her comfortable around him again? Make her say those words, that she loved him? He'd been a fucking fool that night to let his insecurities get in the way. She must have worked up to that for a long time and he'd just thrown it in her face. But she had proved she had more guts than he had. Opening up like that, saying those words, was terrifying when you didn't know if your feelings were reciprocated.
But would she ever feel the same again?
She had to.
She'd taken the sun with her the night she'd left him.
"I'm making Beef Stroganoff. Shouldn't be too long now," he said, clearing his throat as he turned back to his dishes
When she didn't say anything for a few minutes, he turned back to her. She was still standing near the doorway and watching everything he was doing.
The last time he had cooked for her he'd tricked her into signing that contract.
Tonight he was tricking her into staying the night.
He was being deceitful to get a chance to earn her trust. The irony didn't escape him.
"Would you like another drink while we wait?" he asked.
"I probably shouldn't have anymore," she said.
In case she had to drive or because she wanted to keep her head clear? After that kiss last night she had to know that he would still get her on her back given half the chance. She had to know how desperate for her he was. He'd been in agony since he'd tasted her again.
"Have a seat then. I'm sorry the house isn't as comfortable as I would have liked. We'll have to eat here."
"I don't think this is a good idea, Roman. I can find somewhere else to stay for the night and figure this out," she said quietly.
So she did know.
He nodded and wiped his hands on a dishcloth.
"I understand. I'm not forcing you to stay here like..."
Like he had done in London.
If what he had done to get her here was not enough to make her stay, then he would have no choice but to just watch her walk away from him again. At least for tonight.
"I don't ever want you to feel like you did that last weekend. It... It killed me, Evelyn," he admitted, meeting her gaze again.
Her gaze didn't change and she still didn't come any closer. She didn’t buy a word he’d said. Had he already lost this battle, then?
"I know I was an asshole and you don't want to be here right now. But you came to me," he pointed out as he opened a drawer and pulled a remote control out, "because you know I can fix this."
The TV screen came on, showing the security camera screens. And right in front of the gate was the car that Phillip had parked there.
He watched Evelyn tense when she saw it. No, the battle was not lost yet. He still had plenty of cards to play.
"These guys can be quite tenacious. I'll leave this screen on so you can wait for them to go. But I think you should prepare yourself for a long wait."
A very long wait. Philip had already gone and had left the car there for the night.
It didn't take him long to have the food on the table after that. When he pulled a chair out for Evelyn to sit down, she hesitated briefly before she finally walked away from the doorway to sit.
Dinner was a quiet affair with Evelyn looking at the screen on the wall constantly. He left her to her thoughts. He could only nudge her so much, but she had to come to the decision herself.
It was only after he had finished and he refilled their wine glasses that he sat back and studied her face. Evelyn was stunning, even in her work uniform. He’d met many stunning women but Evelyn had touched something in him that he hadn’t known he possessed. For months she had been the only person he looked forward to seeing, the only one who made him forget what a cold, loveless life he’d had before her. She’d made him forget how emotionally crippled he really was because when he was with her, all the other bullshit melted away.
Then she had left, and made him see that what he had in his life was not worth getting out of bed for.
She had to come back to him.
Evelyn looked up at him from behind her long lashes and then quickly looked back at her food. Her cheeks flushed as beautifully as they always did.
“Why are you looking at me like that?” she whispered.
“Because I love looking at you,” he answered easily. “I have to do it while I still can. You’ll be free of me soon.”
Evelyn didn’t say anything. He didn’t know why he felt a little crushed. Maybe because he wanted her to protest, to claim she didn’t want to be free of him.
“Did you really love me, Evelyn?”
The moment the words were out of his mouth he felt like kicking himself. She hadn’t committed to staying the night yet and he was already scaring her off.
He could tell she was surprised by his question because she looked up again and met his gaze. He had made many assumptions about this in the beginning. He’d assumed he could see the way she felt in her eyes long before she had said it out loud. There was nothing like that in her eyes now. What if he was making a mistake?
“Does that matter anymore?” Evelyn asked.
“It matters to me,” he said honestly. “Did you mean those words you said to me?”
“I did,” she said quietly. “But then you proved that what the body wants and what the heart wants are two different things.”
“I’m the last person anyone should listen to when it comes to anything to do with love but I’m sure the two aren’t mutually exclusive.”
Evelyn sighed and looked at the TV screen again. He felt deflated. Hopeless. She wasn’t even open to talking about it, so how were they going to iron things out?
“Can’t you ask Phillip to chase them away?” she asked.
“Outside my gate is public property. They have every right to be there if they’re not parked illegally,” he said. “And even if we could get them away, they would just park somewhere else and wait. Besides, Phillip has gone to make sure your parents are alright.”
He stood up after that lie to clear the table.
“I need to get my bag from the car. I have to get my phone to tell them I’m okay so they don’t stay up worrying,” she said.
“So you’re staying the night?”
He tried not to sound too hopeful.
“Just the night. Maybe by tomorrow they would have moved on and won’t be following me,” Evelyn answered.
Not likely. But he nodded his head and carried the plates over to the sink.
When Evelyn left the kitchen, he pulled his phone out and sent Phillip a message. Tomorrow would be a lot more than what Evelyn had experienced today. And he would be right there to protect her from all of it.