Chapter 50 Expected Restrictions
Chapter 50 Expected Restrictions
SOFIA'S POV
The door opens just as I finish with my lunch.
"You've got physiotherapy and occupational therapy. Respectively ofcourse." The nurse says making me nod in understanding.
It's been four days of this routine.
The tracheostomy will be removed fully today.
Not because its the right decision, but because I insisted I felt fine.
My dad barely comes in here. It's the first time I've seen him visibly upset.
Not hiding it away with his overprotective act.
Just a person who's too disappointed in me to face me directly.
"I really can't wait to go back home." I say softly. My voice is slowly coming back.
He sends a half smile in my direction.
"What?"
"Nothing."
"You know something."
He scoffs.
"Let's get you to your session before I lose my job." He walks over to the bed helping me get off it.
I haven't talked to Mila or Paolo.
I don't have my phone with me.
Strict orders from my dad.
I get through the sessions feeling worn out.
I can walk better now.
A nurse walks me back to my room.
How did I let it get this bad?
I find doctor Meriva standing outside talking to my dad.
"Sofia! It's good to see you moving." She says focusing her attention on my chest.
"Uh yeah....me too."
"Put of breath already?"
"I think I'd breath better through my nose that my throat." I gesture to the tube inserted in my throat.
She smiles.
She leads the way in as dad helps me to the bed.
He avoids my gaze.
"Sofia your dad told me you missed your medication. That led to the transplanted lung being rejected by your body. I know this is sudden...but have you had thoughts of self harm?"
My mouth dries up.
How did she figure that out.
I pause.
"Yes. Whenever I miss my mom and sisters....i think about what it would feel like to join them. I mean I'm on life long medication....it feels exhausting."
The room grows silent with the hospital intercom filling the hallway.
A hand squeezes my shoulder.
"Sofie I didn't know."
My dad says softly.
How could he, when he's buried in his own grief?
"Sofia you cannot miss medication from now on. Your transplanted lung collapsed but we managed to revive it. You're still on the transplant list but even then it might be hard to do a second surgery given the records."
I nod silently.
I understand.
I was reckless. I hadn't been since forever.
Nova felt like....hope.
But even i forgot that hope is given not felt.
"I'm sorry."
She sighs.
"I think therapy would really help you. For your grief. There's no timeline on grieving." She says before placing the clipboard on the edge of the bed.
All this time dad has been quiet.
Somehow that makes me feel even more unsettled.
"I'll wait outside." He walks out as the Doctor preps the gloves to remove the tracheostomy tube.
I lie down on the hospital bed.
Its stings a little but then suddenly feels like air is trapped.
I take a few breathes as instructed and feel my nose breathing out the air I felt was trapped in my lungs.
I watch her remove the gloves and dispose them before grabbing her clipboard and jolting a few notes.
"Okay you'll be discharged tonight. And closely monitored from home. Your father insisted."
I smile dryly.
He promised he'd let me make my own choices.
"Can't I stay here?"
She hums.
"Look Sofia, what happened scared him and probably your friends. That's how he must have felt when he got the call that you collapsed in a school parking lot. Please consider therapy. You two need each other."
I hum in response before she walks out.
Don't they know, that for love I'd give up my own breathing if it meant the air would be enough for one?
Don't they know that Iost people that carried a huge part of myself?
I thought i was getting better.
I thought I'd finally moved past the need to disappear from earth.
But I was just...distracted.
The car ride home is silent. One that reminds you how busy Rome gets in the night.
I wonder if Nova knows.
I wonder if she even cares about her actions.
Nobody has asked me why I was in the parking lot that day.
Not even dad.
"Can I please have my phone back?"
Silence.
"Your belongings are in your room. I'll head to the kitchen and get started on dinner."
Dinner?
He barely cooks dinner.
"It's fine dad, you don't have to."
"I think it's time we ate as a family."
Then he walks into the hallway towards the kitchen.
I head upstairs to my room.
It's been a month. I wonder if anything has changed.
My phone is resting on my bedside table.
My room exactly how I left it the last time I was here.
And on the bed a gift box.
My eyebrows furrow.
Dad wouldn't act that way only to gift me something.
He holds a high regard for accountability.
I read the small card.
Get well soon, N.C.
That's a start.
I scoff.
She sent me a gift?
How did get through dad?
I open the box cautiously.
I notebook.
Not just any notebook, Nova Castiello's notebook.
Did she send it?
Why would she gift me her notebook?
Why would that be a reasonable gift to what happened to me?
I place the blue covered notebook on my bed.
There's something else in the box.
A ring box?
Just how long was I gone?
I open the box not wanting my assumptions to lead my thoughts.
There's a ring resting in the middle. Nothing flashy but something worth recognition.
There's a not on the bottom of the box.
I hesitate but reach for it.
Three sentences each resting on a separate line.
I'm sorry I hurt you.
I'm sorry I failed at showing you my love.
I'm sorry I ever hesitated when all I wanted was you.
I re-read the sentences.
Nowhere does it explain a ring.
I reach for my phone, turning it on for the first time.
It's fully charged. Ofcourse it is.
My notifications explode over the next couple of minutes.
Then the room grows silent.
The first notifications are from Mila and Paolo.
Then the next five hundred ones are from....Nova.
I call my bestfriend first.
Her line doesn't go through.
I try Paolo. Same thing.
It's almost as if they're choosing not to pick up.
Or maybe it isn't the right time yet.
I open the notifications one at a time.
She texted me everyday like I'd one day respond?
I croll through each one.
Nova: Day 6. I'm still here.
I eventually shut my phone.
Why wasn't she this open and vulnerable with me before?
There's a soft knock on the door.
"Miss, dinner is ready." The staff says before I hear her footsteps fade.
I was gone for a month.
I wonder how much has changed since then.
Downstairs, dad is already in his seat waiting.
"Finally." His tone is softer now.
I settle in my seat before he serves me.
"We have alot to talk about, but for now...lets eat."
He focuses on his plate.
We eat in silence.
My head still processing Nova's texts.
Do they mean anything to me now?
When I'm done, my step-dad leads me to his study.
Then gestures for me to take a seat.
"You're not going back to Milan."
My heart clenches.
I'm an adult.
"Why?"
"It's for the best Sofie."
I remain silent.
"Your relationship with Nova is over. I don't want her near you. She's bad for your health."
I chew on my bottom lip.
He's never been involved in my love life unless it really mattered.
He pauses.
"And you're no longer going to places alone. You have an assigned driver and he reports back to me." His face hardens a little.
I can tell these decisions were harder for him.
"Can I ask why?"
He blinks.
Then reaches for his phone on his desk.
Scrolls through something before handing it to me.
A flashy headline of my condition out in the open.
The Vescovi Heir on borrowed Time.
That's a hurtful headline.
I'm surprised it's still up.
"Only your friends and Nova Castiello knew about your condition."
That lands.
"Am I forbidden from seeing them too?"
He sighs.
"No. I don't think either of them would do that to you."
He takes the empty seat next to me.
He thinks Nova did it.
"Sofie, I know we both have been through alot. You more than me. I just don't want to lose you too."
That stays.
"You won't."
He looks over to me.
Did he really think that I'd put up a fight when the restriction is on someone who hurt me?
Someone I should never want to see again?