Pain, lose and love
New tears started to run down my face when I sobbed into the pillow. I never understood till this moment what it felt like to be a victim. The sobbing became loud sobs and gulps for air. My body was racked with termors that turned into full body shaking I felt the bed dip and knew that Draven had come into the room. He sat on the bed and finally pulled me into his arms. It wasn’t easy for him because I had three blankets around me but he didn’t try to take them off. Just pulled me to him and held me while I cried. Why me? Is all that kept running through my mind. I had started over, left that behind me. It came back to bite me.
“I called your mom and she is on her way, the body is gone we took care of it. I don’t think it killed him all the way to be honest.” Draven whispered to me.
I started to shake when he said that and he held me tighter and I sighed into him. I wasn’t ready to say that I loved the man but I was ready to say that he made it better. I was cold so very cold. No matter how many blankets I had on me. Draven tried so hard to calm me.
“What we have to do now is burn him. I know you don’t really want to hear this, but you need to hear it. I want you to understand that he will never hurt you again.” I took a deep breath and could smell his blood, it called to me and I realized then that the bags didn’t cure it all.
I came out of the blankets some and looked at the man holding me. I had fought hard to keep Blaze from hurting me and I didn’t know for sure if I would ever be the same. This had been hell and I didn't know how to get my brain to stop going in circles.
“I need to feed Draven.” I knew that only his blood would fix the wounds. I didn't think that Blaze had bitten me, but I wasn't in my right mind either.
He didn’t ask from whom, he just tilted his head showing me that wonderful vein. I kissed it then let my fangs slide into him. The blood was sweet and so old it healed wounds I didn’t know I had. If only it could fix certain wounds but I knew it couldn’t seem to fix was my heart. It was broken down the middle and I didn’t know if my mind would ever come back from it. I licked his neck and closed the wounds and tired not to shiver at his slight touch. It was a very sexual way to feed. It was hard for me to see it at the moment.
It took him another hour to get me to put on some clothes. I didn’t want anything touching me, but I knew I didn’t want anyone to see me either. So I pulled on some pants and a shirt. Draven was so sweet about it all, he didn’t leave me when I yelled and screamed at him to leave me alone. Mom arrived about two hours before dawn and I cried the first twenty minutes of her being at the house. Mom held me close and comforted me as best she could, I did notice that Dad was right behind her. He was smart enough not to try to touch me, but did tell me that he was glad I had killed the bastard. I was glad as well.
I told my mom why he had wanted to kill me. I guess that Draven over heard that part because he growled and came over to where I stood with my mom. One look into his handsome face said something to me that I could never understand until now. Draven loved me, but did I love him? I knew that when he was around I felt my heart stutter and I felt weak in the knees. The sex was amazing with him and the taste of his blood took me to another plain. I pushed all the thoughts to the back of my mind and shivered at that look. I didn't know how to act or react to him. He didn't try to touch my skin, always sure that a piece of clothing was between his hand and my skin. I could almost feel his pain, the sorrow that he was feeling for me.
He knew something but he didn’t speak to me, instead he moved into the office and sat in my oversized chair. I didn’t like having leather office chairs; they stuck to my thighs when I wore skirts. After tonight I didn’t know if I would ever want to wear a skirt again. Mom helped me into the bed and looked after me for a while, I knew she was tired so I closed my eyes and went into a dreamless sleep. I tossed and turned in my bed feeling the sheets tangle around my body.
When I felt the bed dip I thought it might be mom but the scent was off. When I opened my eyes I saw Draven sitting on the bed brushing my hair out of my face that seemed to be wet with tears again. I didn’t pull away from him like I had the first time he came into the room. I knew I would get better, but it would take time.
“My sweet Natalia, I am sorry that you had to go through that.” Draven did something that made me feel a little warmer.
I knew his heart was breaking for me and I felt warmth enter me. Maybe I wouldn’t be so sad all the time. As of this moment I made a vow to myself that I would try to do better, that I would look for something good in the world. Right this moment that something was Draven. It was then that I realized that I loved him. That my heart was his from the moment I had meet him at my mother’s house.