43

Colsin gingerly takes Nel arm into his hand and lead them away from everyone else. It was to Nel’s surprise that they ended up right back where she had started. The pantry.

Unlike Nel, Colsin made sure that both of the doors were shut and locked. She watched on as he seemed to make sure that they were secure. As he stood with his back to her, Nel couldn’t help but admire the physique of the young alpha.

His back was large, and he was tall, his long-sleeved black shirt complimented every perfect bulge on his arms. And the jeans…

Just as her gaze began to lower itself, Colsin turned around and right before he did, Nel quickly looked away, and mentally kicked herself for almost salivating over this jerk.

When Colsin turned around, he watched as she anxiously crossed her arms and shifted her stance. She would not even look at him. He took that moment to watch her.

It was chilly outside that day, so she wore a pair of distressed jeans. To Colsin it was a tease, her soft brown skin peeking through each rip and small tear. Her long-sleeved shirt hugged her quite well, and with every slight move, it would rise to reveal her taught stomach.

Nel started to become uncomfortable as his eyes continued to linger on her. “You wanted to talk or something?” she finally burst.

“Yeah,” Colsin cleared his throat and finally said. “I do.” He leaned against the left door, crossing his arms. Again, he returned to silence for a moment before saying. “You, uh…you look good today.”

“Thanks.” Nel was caught off guard by his compliment. As far as Nel was concerned, they weren’t at a stage in their dysfunctional relationship where they could openly compliment one another. “You do to-”

“Ah, ah.” He waved away Nel’s compliment. “I didn’t tell you that to receive a compliment in return. It was just an observation.”

“Diddo,” countered Nel without hesitation. “But I’m sure liking what you see isn’t the reason that you brought me here…right?” At this rate, Nel never knew where she stood with him. What she did know, however, was that Colsin Stone had an aught against her kind. Now that, she would never forget.

“I am a Lycan after all.” She mirrored the disgust in his voice that night in her room. “Lycans repulse you. So certainly, you shouldn’t-”

Nel’s smugness was immediately cut off by Colsin’s large hand pressed against her mouth, smothering her words on her lips.

As he stood pressed against her, his hands on her mouth, he looked down into her eyes anxiously.

“You need to be careful of how you sling that word around, Red.”

Nel breathed heavily against Colsin’s hand and then she snatched it away. “Why? Are you embarrassed that people would know that the goddess mother thought so lowly of you that she matched you with a treacherous Lyca-”

Colsin pushed his hand against her mouth again, this time more aggressively than the last, his impatience far more evident this time around.

“These walls may be soundproof but that does not account for those with special abilities. Don’t you see that I am trying to protect you?!” he hissed.

Him saying this definitely caught Nel off guard. Should she really believe that? Part of her wanted to; maybe…a part of her did believe it. But how could she? How could she believe that this guy possibly meant her any good after how he expressed such disdain for her kind.

Regardless, Nel realized that being quiet would do better for finding clarity on what exactly it was that this was between them.

Colsin sighed. “Listen,” he pulled away from her but not far away enough not to be affected by their bond. “You’re right, I do not care much for…that species,” he was careful how he used his words. “I was born, raised, and conditioned to think of them as the enemy and so I do. I cannot change that overnight.”

Nel’s eyes lingered on him for a moment. She probably should have been upset by his answer. In fact, she was almost sure that anyone else would have been, but she just couldn’t be. How could she find fault in logic? Finally, she looked away from him as she replied. “I understand.” Still though, “I just need you to understand that…well, that I didn’t ask for any of this. I didn’t ask to be who and what I am. I did not ask to be abandoned in a town full of wolves. And I certainly did not ask to be mated to you, Colsin Stone. I do not make it a life goal to make my life any harder than what it is and I just…”

“You think that life has been harder since finding me?”

Nel looked up at him, her brow rising as they both knew that she did not have to answer that question for them both to know that it was the truth.

Colsin chuckled and shook his head. “Okay, dumb question.”

“Yeah, it was,” Neliyah smirked in return.

Colsin decided in that almost light-hearted moment that he liked when Neliyah smiled. He touched her forearm to gain her attention again. “I’m sorry, Red.”

Nel stopped everything that she did and looked at him with surprise. “What?”

“I’m sorry…I apologize…for everything that I said and did to make you unhappy. Despite my…stubbornness-”

“Bull headedness, cockiness, arrogance, temper…I mean we can go on, and on…and on-”

“Okay, okay, okay, I get it.” Colsin cut her off, and though he was frustrated by her pointing out his flaws, he was more delighted that she still wore a hint of mirth on her perfect face. “There are some things that I have to work on.”

“Yes,” she agreed with a small smile.

“But for now I’d just like to start out with an apology. I pride myself in thinking on my toes in virtually every situation,” said Colsin. “This…however, is new territory. I do feel an obligation to you, Neliyah Larken, and I do want you to be happy. I also want what is best for my pack.” He added with just as much conviction as he did concerning her.

“Well, I guess we’ll just have to figure this out…together.”

“Okay,” he agreed. “Are there any…specific requests that you have for me to make your life easier?”

“Sex.”

When Nel said this, Colsin’s eyes went wide, and he backed away from her. “Sex?! You…you want to have sex-”

“No, no, no! That-I did not mean it that way! I just-I meant you and your girlfriend.”

“Ah…right.” Colsin would not say this aloud, but he admittedly was disappointed though he was sure that he did not do a good job of hiding it. “You do realize that I have needs…right?” he took another step toward her. “Being mated to you only makes them stronger. It’s not been easy holding out, and Sara has become…anxious as well.”

“If I’m being honest with you, Colsin Stone,” started Nel. “I could care less about what Sara Slate feels. I only care about your feelings because outside of our forced bond…you’ve actually gotten me to like you within the last three minutes.” She attempted at a small joke and was very successful as he grinned and then chuckled. Then her mirth ended abruptly as she said. “If I feel a pain like I did that night…I will know, Colsin Stone, and…I will not be happy about it. This is your choice to keep our mating bond. It’s only fair that you at least save me the physical pain of betrayal.”

“So, what? What do you want me to do? Break up with Sara?”

“I never said that.”

“It was certainly implied,” retorted Colsin. “That much is for sure.”

“An implication was never made on my part, Colsin Stone. Just a request.”

“A request to-”

“Keep it in your pants until you figure out what you want to do about us.”

Until I? As if it was solely just his decision. “So, it’s just on me then…is that what you’re saying?”

Was he offended? “I’m saying that at the end of the day, whatever I want is irrelevant, Colsin Stone.”

“That’s not true,” countered Colsin.

“Isn’t it?” retorted Nel.

“I’ve never given you any indication of that being true.”

“You serious right now?” asked Nel with blatant sarcasm. “Shall we take account?” Colsin hardly gathered the words to leave his lips before she started speaking again. “Once you found out that we are mates, you took me out of my mother’s home, forced me to live in the packhouse without my consent, allowed your girlfriend to disrespect and belittle me, you had sex with her knowing what it would do to me. Every single time I try to leave this place, I’m questioned concerning my whereabouts. Shall I go on?”

Colsin closed his eyes and groaned in his hands. “I could…see how that could have been interpreted as controlling but that’s not what I was trying to do.”

“Am…am I supposed to believe that?” asked Nel. “Because I don’t. You’ve been controlling me-or at least trying to from the moment that mated string of yours was attached to mine.”

“I don’t expect you to understand how complicated it is to be…who I am.”

“I don’t know. In fact, I cannot begin to imagine how difficult it is to be your own man while trying to simultaneously live up to your father’s expectations. However, it’s not fair to drag others into this dysfunction. Some females may be willing, but I am not, Colsin Stone.”

“So, what…what are you saying?” he asked. “That you want to reject me?”

“It’s starting to seem that this would be the easiest route for both our sakes. You can’t even seem to make the simplest choice between me and Sara.”

“There are reasons for that.”

Nel laughed and rolled her eyes. “Well, if this is really decision that we both should make, what if I told you that I’ve already made mine?”

“Oh?” Colsin took a step toward Neliyah. “And what is your decision?”

“Rejection,” said Neliyah. “If I am not worthy enough for you to just…. choose me…then reject me, Colsin Stone.”