Chapter 41 Let's break up
DASHIELL
I trudged down the road, my mind going back to what Nova asked of me. I knew a day like this would come. A moment where I would have to choose between Nova and Lilith; however, I thought I still had time. I wanted a chance to tell Lilith how I actually felt about Nova, to let her know I wasn't going to fulfill my promise to her, the one I gave to her those years ago.
My legs seemed heavy as I dragged it, my thoughts spiralling out of control as I tried to think of how to drop the bombshell on Lilith.
I knew it had to be now. Knowing Nova, she might change her mind should I stall for more time. Telling Lilith about it now seemed to be the right decision, yet I felt reluctant. Just for a moment.
Lilith has been with me for 5 years. She had faithfully stayed by my side, patiently waiting for the day I would confess to her, not knowing my heart had long found another person to love. I couldn't tell when it happened, but it did.
Halfway to my location, I flagged a taxi down, and got in, giving him Lilith's address. I wanted to get things done earlier, so I would return to Nova's house to tell her of my decision. I bet it would thrill her to know I gave Lilith up, so I would be with her.
After paying the driver when we got to my destination, I trudged towards her front porch, trying not to think more about what I was set to do.
Without thinking much about it, I raised my hand and knocked on the door. I didn't bother pressing the bell as I went the old-fashioned way. Like always.
Lilith opened the door after I confirmed who I was. "What are you doing here? Didn't you say you had something to take care of?" She lifted an eyebrow, her gaze suspicious.
"I have something I need to tell you." Pushing past her, I stepped into her house after removing my shoes. I strode over to my favourite couch and plopped down on it, sighing as I watched her approach, the puzzled frown still on her face.
"Is everything alright?"
"Yeah." I nodded with a forced smile. "I just..." Exhaling, I ran my fingers through my hair. "I'm sorry," I said after a minute of silence.
"Why are you suddenly apologizing?" She sat next to me and took my hand in hers. "Is everything alright? You are scaring me." "Let's break up," I said, peering into her eyes.
"What??!" She suddenly let go of my hand. "What the hell are you talking about? Tell me you are joking."
"I'm not. I have decided to get back together with Nova. She's still my wife and -"
"Your wife?" She scoffed, glaring at me. "I can see. So you never loved me, Dashiell??? All those years with you were lies???"
"You know that's not true." I reached towards her and removed the stray strands of hair from her face. "I loved you back then. I never lied about my feelings. It's just.... I can't tell when it started, but my love for you became platonic."
I still liked her. But more like a friend. I wouldn't say a sister, as I had slept with her.
"Oh?" she scoffed, folding her arms as she got to her feet. "You are letting me go for someone who abandoned you years ago?"
"Lils -"
"I was the only one there for you when your granny fucking died! Where was Nova? In another country with another man!" She yelled out, looking pissed.
This was the first time she had looked this murderous. I had always seen her furious, but not to this extent.
Exhaling, I held her hands in mine and caused her to look at me. "You will always have a place in my heart, Lils. You will always be my best friend, someone I can trust."
"But I don't want that." She removed her hands from my grip. "I love you, Dash. I love you so much that I'm willing to do everything for you. All I ask is for you to return my affection."
"I'm afraid I can't." Sighing, I closed my eyes and relaxed on the couch. "I don't love you anymore."
There was a prolonged silence, one that made me peek an eye open, to check if she was still in the sitting room with me. When she noticed my gaze on her, she exhaled as she got to her feet. "Are you sleeping over or returning to your house?" She asked, her voice devoid of any emotion.
I wanted to reach out to her, to apologize, but I knew it wouldn't help anything. It would only add to her grievances. Which was why I nodded as I got to my feet. "I don't want to impose on you. I don't think staying back is the right thing to do." I turned to leave, but she held my hand, preventing me from doing that.
I turned, frowning as I wondered why she stopped me.
"What do you love about her?" She asked, her expression pleading. "Is there anything about me you don't like?"
"No. You are perfect." I leaned down and placed a kiss on her forehead. "Love isn't about physical attributes most times. The heart controls it." Smiling, I removed her grip from my arm and walked towards the exit. "Goodbye, Lils," I said before I left, closing the door gently behind me.
The moment the door shut behind me, I leaned on it and closed my eyes. Breaking up wasn't as easy as I assumed it would be, especially with someone you have been with for years. I never thought it would take a toll on me, but it did.
Puffing out a breath, I drew away from the door, and left, heading straight to Nova's house. I had done what she asked me to do. I believe
It was time she fulfilled her promise.