Chapter 19 The baby is born
Liana
It started on a Tuesday.
A very busy Tuesday afternoon . I had a full ward round scheduled, two consultations after lunch and a case review at four.
It wasn't too much, I mean that's what my ideal Tuesdays look like, but my body's reaction that day was slightly different.
There was a weird heaviness at my back, then followed by my stomach. “It's definitely the baby's position.”
Or maybe I've had too much to do today, my body certainly needs to cooperate, at least until I'm done for today.
Unfortunately, my body seemed to have a mind of its own, as halfway through the first consultation, the pain worsened, and I could no longer feel my legs.
I finished with the client anyway, and walked the patient out.
“There you are.” Dr. Korran said the moment he sighted me walking back to my office. “Are you okay?”
“Oh, I'm fine.” I mumbled, my legs growing heavier as I walked.
I would have said it was the baby, except that I wasn't due until another week.
Was the baby perhaps sick of staying in the womb, and eager to see my face?
A sharp pain hit my stomach, and I moaned in pain. “Ahh”
“Your baby!” Aiden exclaimed, rushing to me. “A week earlier?”
I nodded, no longer able to talk.
“Just hang in,” he said again, wrapping his hand around my waist softly. “I'll call the maternity unit”
I looked at him, and he looked back with that settled expression of his. “I can man…”
“Liana,” he said my name in a quiet and final manner.
In less than a minute, a stretcher was wheeled towards me, with two nurses on each side.
“Go with them, I'll get your stuff from your office.”
His eyes were a contortion of concern and sorry, and although it was weird to admit, it warmed my heart.
“I'll call Dr. Lane too” he added, as I was wheeled away.
The nurses and midwives received me and the hours that followed were the longest and most painful I've ever loved through.
I won't try to make it beautiful because honestly, it wasn't j.
It seemed like time stopped moving, and I was stuck in a limbo of pain.
In med school, I read and understood what happened every hour, but none of that was useful at this hour when my body was doing something that felt entirely beyond everything I've ever studied.
I kept trying anyway, not like I had any choice, I mean… that was the only option available to me.
At least if not for anything, because my baby that rested on the other side needed to transcend down here.
At exactly nine pm, a young voice cried through the room, and the nurses cleaned him up, before placing him in my arms.
I looked down at his face, and a tear slid down my face as the whole world narrowed. He was small, adorable yet furiously screaming.
But there was something else, his features were already so defined, and unmistakably familiar.
I knew that face, I'd gone through the last five years staring at the same face for approval, watched it become indifferent, cold, until he made me sign the documents.
My throat closed, and I looked up at the ceiling for a second, then back at him. He was still screaming, with his tiny fist closed around my pinky finger.
It warmed my heart, although I knew that clinically, newborns didn't do anything deliberately yet, I still felt it.
Unlike Ethan D'Arden, my baby wouldn't be a wound I have to heal from or bleed through.
I've barely been certain about anything in months, but I was about this one. Whatever Ethan was, or had done to me, none of it was coming into this room, and my baby would be the reason, the best one I ever had.
We were transferred to a private ward where Felicity and Aiden were already seated, obviously waiting.
“Congratulations, Dr. Whitmore” Aiden said, standing beside my bed, his entire gaze fixed on my baby. “I told you you had it under control.”
I managed to flash him a weak smile, while fighting with the thoughts in my head that wouldn't stop reminding me that I can't be better than my mother.
Felicity walked to me in silence and took the baby from my hand. “He looks just like you, child. Congratulations”
“Thank you Mummy.” I said, a tear slipping down my eyes again.
Chloe rushed in at that moment, slightly out of breath. “Liana… congratulations “
“Thank you.” I flashed her a weak smile.
“Look how tiny he is, cutie,” she grinned, playing with his hands. “Damn, he looks just like you.”
Why were they all seeing me in the baby, when all I could see was Ethan's perfect replica?
“Chloe, you'll both talk later, let Liana rest.” Dr. Lane said and Aiden concurred with a nod. “The last six hours were a lot for her.”
Six hours?
So that's how long I spent there, yet it felt like I was there forever.
Now that I think about it, he's not really said anything to me aside from the congratulations, he just kept staring at the baby with a lot of unspoken words in his eyes.
Although I didn't know what that look was, and I was too tired to figure out what it was.
Maybe I really needed the rest, because I couldn't understand the overwhelming feeling that lingered, why was I starting to overthink everything else?
Like I wasn't going to be that good mother that my child deserved, like my child would go around seeking approval because there was never love at home.
Regardless of what it's going to cost, my child will grow in love, and have enough love to give.
I looked down at the baby, who had finally stopped screaming and was now doing something that looked almost like considering the situation.
“It's complicated” I thought, “the world that you've come into, but I promise you, we're going to be okay…”