Chapter 45--Liberating

I take a moment to compose myself, determined to focus on the game rather than the electrifying touch of Ryan's hands. God, it'd never been so difficult to play one game. Why does he keep distracting me so?

I step forward and release the ball, watching as it glides smoothly down the lane, hitting the pins with precision. A cheer erupts from both Ryan and Ash, and I can't help but join in, feeling a rush of excitement. I've never had to do this before, with anyone else. I can't even remember the last time I had fun like this.

It is liberating, sorta, and maybe what is more liberating is being able to flirt with Ryan publicly, knowing that pictures are being taken of us by the press around us and we will probably make the news tonight. I can already see the displeasure that's going to be on his parents' faces when we get back to his home.

The entire game felt like a dance between Ryan and I. An intimate one that left me breathless and hot all over.

I peer at Ash's sleeping form and I try not to pout. I do love my son a lot, but right now, I need Ryan. I need to get him alone. No family interrupting us, no Ash walking in on us kissing, not his mother purposely trying to drive a wedge between us every time she sees us in the same place. I need him alone, today. I've had enough of all of this. He taunted me the entire day, teases me with his lips against my temple, my cheeks and his fingers kept trailing lines along my body, leaving my inner muscles clenching with need.

Even now as he drives us home, the hot gazes he casts my way are more than enough to tell me that he is thinking the exact same thing.

We need to get a room. Asap. Right now.

And Ash has got to go.

"We could leave him with the the nanny my mother provided."

I shake my head. "No. I don't trust her enough."

Ryan nods, eyes darting along the road. I know that he understands what I meant and won't take it the wrong way. I'm not leaving my son with his family, unchecked. Who know what they'll tell him. Who knows what Jasper will try to do. I'm not taking any risks or chances with Ash.

I do try to keep my agitation and discomfort hidden for the most part of it, but Ryan can tell my feelings. He can see through me like a book and he know that I do not like them. His parents. His family. It doesn't mean that I cannot try to adjust. I can, and I am willing to do everything I can to make things work, but it might be the most difficult task yet.

Why? Well, my parents technically did disown me because I refused to give up on who I was and live up to their expectations. I see Ryan's parents in the same light, and I absolutely cannot stand them.

"Take a turn to the left," I say, unlocking my phone.

"Why? Know someone on this street?"

I nod, smiling. She's probably going to have my head for only showing up at her doorstep after years to have her babysit Ash, but I'm sure she'll understand. July is after all my son's godmother.

"Yeah. My best friend. She can look after Ash tonight."

My words hang in the air between us and I can tell from the tightness of this shoulders that Ryan is nervous.

He suddenly turns off the air conditioner and open the windows, like he cannot seem to get enough air. My lips twitch at the sight of his cheeks burning—well, mine are burning with the same intensity as well, but it is nice, seeing him fidget.

I would too, if I started to ponder on what will transpire between us when we do get back to the hotel room. So, I don't let myself think much about it. Though the anticipation is nearly suffocating.

In no time, I direct Ryan to July's apartment and I all but leap out the car when I see her open the door to inspect her parking lot.

Her eyes widen when they land on me and a silly grin lights up her face. "Christ! Amby?!"

I grin, clutching Ash to my chest tightly as I race for her. She shrieks, taking me into her warm embrace and we spend an entire minute hugging and teasing each other like children would.

"Don't tell me—" She gasps upon seeing Ryan. "Is that? Oh my God. He is even hotter in real life!"

My cheeks burn in embarrassment...and that makes two of us, because Ryan is busy blushing too.