Chapter 98 MESSED UP MIND

Chapter 98 MESSED UP MIND
Kali's POV 

I should’ve been sleeping, or at least doing something else rather than sulking in my bed all day, but no matter how hard I tried, I just couldn't shake off the gnawing feeling surrounding me. It echoed all around, and I hated how a tiny bit of frustration nipped at my sides. 

My mind was a mess, and if there was anything worse than what I was already feeling, then it definitely had to be the fact that I had so many unanswered questions at the back of my mind. There were tons of them, but only one stood out in so many variations. 

Why? Why Diego why? 

I honestly thought I was confusing, and that alone made me easily perceived as what I wasn't to other people, but with all that had gone down today and in the last couple of hours, I liked to think someone else had taken that title, and that man was none other than Alpha Diego. 

The mere thought of him was more than enough to send shivers racing down my spine. I pressed my eyes shut, and without warning, my mind took that as an opportunity to replay the little escapade we had the other night. 

The kiss. 

It wasn't a secret that I was still reeling from it, and even Venus couldn't keep quiet about it, but one ugly thought raised its head whenever I thought about it. After the kiss, Diego literally disappeared. 

He wasn't at breakfast this morning and even when I took an unplanned walk past his study, I didn't see him. Only when my gaze fell on him  on the field did it finally occur to me what the fuck he was doing. 

He was avoiding me. 

I would be lying if I said the truth didn't hurt, it did, but somehow I still found myself marching towards him. I didn't have anything planned, but even in a million years, I never expected the words that slid past his lips. 

“This… whatever you think is between us, it ends here” his voice had been low and sharp. “It was just one kiss, there's no need to read too much meaning into it.”

It was a miracle how I hadn't broken down in front of him right there when the words slid past his lips. It was an even bigger miracle how I hadn't slapped him across the cheek. He said the kiss was worthless, but why, why did I feel his wolf calling out to me that he didn't mean it? 

A small sigh slid past my lips as I flopped onto my back, staring at the ceiling,my fists curled into the sheets.

“I’m not going to think about that,” I muttered. “I just need to see him. That’s all.”

Sure you do. Venus’s voice slid into my head, low and mocking. 

“I mean it,” I hissed under my breath. “He never told me what my punishment was for failing to find evidence on that bastard. That’s the only reason I’m going to his study. Just business.”

Business? Venus laughed, the sound brushing against my ribcage like claws. You can lie to yourself all you want, Kali. But you’re itching to see him again. To see if he’ll touch you like that a second time.

My cheeks heated up immediately, which was embarrassing given I was the only one in the room, but it didn't matter. Venus wasn't a stranger to the many emotions Diego could pull out from me, so there was no need hiding it. 

“That was a mistake, Venus and you know this.” Heat climbed my throat.  “He was drunk, and I could practically taste it back then.”

I found myself licking my bottom lip subconsciously, but before I could think too much about it, Venus’ voice clawed at the back of my head again. 

Drunk, yes. She sneered. But drunk lips don’t linger like that. Drunk hands don’t grip your waist like you’re the only damn anchor they’ve ever known.

“Shut up,” I whispered fiercely, shoving myself off the bed. “I’m going because I want closure. That’s it.”

Of course. 

“I mean it.” I huffed, whilst putting on my dress. A small and almost irrelevant thought to dress a little provocatively popped up at the back of my mind, but I pushed it aside before it could fester. “I just need to talk to him and find out what my punishment will be. No matter what happened, it's better I hear it from his mouth than Raelyn's.” 

A shudder raced down my spine at our last conversation, but Venus didn't seem fazed. Instead, she purred inside me, amused. 

Keep lying, little wolf. I’ll wait.

I dragged in a breath and left my room before I could change my mind. The corridors were quiet, the air heavy with the scent of rain leaking through the old stone walls. Each step toward his study made my pulse thrum harder, like I was walking into a trap I had built for myself.

But when I finally reached the heavy oak door, hand halfway to knocking, I froze. Voices.

Two of them.

I recognized Diego’s first , cool and sharp as glass. And the other one belonged to Leo.

I leaned closer, heart hammering, every instinct screaming that I shouldn’t be eavesdropping, but I didn't listen. If anything, the fact that it was slightly forbidden spiked my adrenaline levels to the top. 

“She believes he’s dead,” Leo said, his voice tight. “You should tell her the truth, Diego. Keeping her in the dark…..”

“No.” Diego’s reply was immediate, flat with finality. “It was a test. One she failed and.…..”

“Failed?” Leo scoffed and I could swear I heard mockery in them. “If I remember clearly, that's not your definition of failure. You wanted her to lie to you, to do anything she could to convince you to help her. That was what you expected her to do…”

“And yet she did the opposite.” Diego snarled so hard I winced. “What don't you understand?”

“What I understand, is you're trying g desperately to find a loophole out of this.” Leo wasn't having it. “You need to tell her Diego. You need to tell her that you set it all up and that man really isn't dead.”

“No.” He shook his head. “Knowing the truth now would only weaken her resolve, and make her more persistent in pushing her agenda.” 

Wait, what? 

My stomach dipped as realization pressed into me. It came all at once, like a fucking freight train ramming into me at an inhumane speed. 

Dead? A test? So the rogue really wasn't a rogue? It was all a plan?

Something twisted in my chest, and quickly put two and two together to figure out it was hurt, with a little hint of betrayal. Of all things in the world, this was the last thing I expected to walk into. 

“She deserves to know,” Leo pressed. “If she thinks she failed….”

“That failure will make her stronger,” Diego snapped. “And until I decide otherwise, she’ll live with it.”

I staggered back, pulse crashing against my ears.

The man wasn’t dead? All of it, the guilt, the sleepless nights, manufactured for some twisted game Diego had set up?

Venus growled low inside me, sharp and feral. Now do you see? He kissed you, yes, but he’ll never stop playing you.

My throat tightened, and that was a tell tale sign that I didn't want to believe what I'd just heard was the truth. I should’ve turned and left, stormed back to my room, but my feet stayed planted, trembling between the need to flee and the sick pull of wanting to know more.

Let's go. Venus whispered in my head. We don't need to hear anymore. 

For the first time all day, I actually agreed to Venus' words. Tears stung the back of my eyes, and I turned towards Diego's study one last time . The duo were still conversing,, but I'd tuned them out a little over a while ago. 

I'd heard enough. 

I steeled my resolve before turning to my room, and perhaps if I knew that fate had other plans for me,  I would have turned away earlier. One minute I was about to leave, and the next, my hand accidentally tipped over the vase in the corner. 

A loud crashed pierced the night as it shattered to the ground, the shards spreading all around me. It was scary, and while I winced at the sharp pain that nicked at my leg, nothing could have topped the loud voice that followed after. 

“Who the hell is that?” 

Shit. It was Diego and he'd fucking heard me.