Chapter 54 Everything Else Would Have To Wait

Nathan's POV

The forest blurred around me through tear-filled eyes as I ran on four paws, my massive black wolf form tearing through the underbrush.

I'd been running for hours, hoping the physical exertion would somehow quiet the storm raging inside me.

But it didn't!

I slowed to a stop, panting heavily, and shifted back to human form.

Standing naked in the forest as dusk approached, I realized no amount of running would change what happened or distract me from the question that kept clawing at my mind:

How could Rachel do something so terrible?

I retrieved the clothes I'd hidden earlier—pants and a button-down shirt—and pulled them on, barely noticing the mud and dirt that clung to my skin.

Taking deep breaths, I tried to focus. She was just my bought slave, so why was I so heartbroken?

I had to pull myself together, for I had meetings to attend and Alpha duties that couldn't wait, even for... this.

As I approached the castle, my gaze involuntarily shifted toward the garden cliff edge.

Though I wasn't standing at the exact spot where I'd witnessed Rachel jump, the image flashed vividly in my mind: her copper hair whipping in the wind, her dress billowing around her as she plummeted into the darkness below.

Another wave of pain hit me so hard my body shook.

"She wouldn't," I growled, more to myself than anyone. "She wouldn't do that."

The Rachel I knew cherished the Alpha heir growing inside her. She would never harm our child. But I had seen her jump.

In a burst of rage, I slammed my fist into a towering oak with my full strength. The tree trunk caved inward, leaving a massive dent.

Blood dripped from my knuckles, but the physical pain was nothing compared to what was raging inside me.

I forced my breathing to slow, watching as my eyes gradually shifted from gold back to gray.

The warriors guarding the castle entrance looked relieved when they saw me approach—until they noticed my bleeding fist and disheveled appearance.

"Alpha Nathan!" One immediately bowed. "We'll call Emma right away!"

"Stand back!" I roared, charging past them.

They exchanged a glance before lowering their heads and returning to their posts without another word.

The Moon Goddess Suite felt achingly empty without Rachel. I stood in the doorway, suddenly aware of how quiet it was without her soft singing.

I clenched my fist tighter, intensifying the pain from my already injured hand. Even that couldn't distract me from the hollow feeling in my chest.

Forcing myself to focus on something else, I walked to the dressing table for a towel to wipe the blood from my hand. That's when I saw it—an envelope with my name written in Rachel's handwriting.

My chest tightened. I couldn't bring myself to pick it up.

I wanted to open it, but I was afraid that she would say she hated me and that it was a farewell.

A knock at the door interrupted my thoughts.

"Alpha, it's us," Tyler's voice came through the door.

I opened the door to find Tyler, Gina, and Victoria standing there, silently watching me.

"What do you want?" I asked.

"We were worried—" Gina started, but I cut her off.

"Don't you have better things to do? Raymond and Madison are still in the castle."

Gina just stared at me with wide eyes.

I ignored her and turned to Tyler. "How did things go last night after I left?"

Though surprised by my question, Tyler answered immediately. "I spent the remaining time talking with Raymond and the other Alphas. Gina privately reported the situation to King Jason. Most guests were socializing and didn't notice your absence. Mia took several of our wolves to conduct an extensive search for Rachel..."

"Still no word?" I asked, though I already knew the answer.

"...No, Alpha," Tyler replied softly.

I nodded, feeling both frustrated and oddly relieved by the confirmation. "Good. I've received your report. You can go now."

None of them moved.

"Why are you still here?!" I shouted, anger flaring again.

Victoria stepped forward, her eyes red and face swollen from crying. "Alpha, she... I can't believe..." but she broke down again before finishing.

Gina walked to the desk and picked up Rachel's letter. "Aren't you going to read this?" she asked.

I cleared my throat and turned away. "Not now."

"But, Nathan—" Gina reached for my arm.

I yanked it away, my voice more furious and out of control than I'd intended. "Damn it, Gina! I said not now!"

Her eyes widened as she pulled back her hand.

"What the hell is wrong with you!" she snapped. "You're doing it again, just like after Dad died. Whatever!"

I'd expected her to storm out, but she didn't. My eyes widened at her words, a fresh ache —devastating— spreading through my chest.

I sighed, realizing this was hard for her too. She had been excited about the baby, about becoming an aunt.

I turned to face Tyler and Victoria, trying to moderate my tone. "Do you have something to say? Just spit it out."

Tyler answered for all of them. "We're worried about you, Alpha."

"I'm good," I said, turning toward the bathroom. "I need a shower. I have meetings with Raymond scheduled today."

"Alpha!" Tyler called out in surprise, but I continued walking and closed the bathroom door between us.

I let the warm water wash away the dirt, trying to numb my thoughts. But I knew it couldn't wash away the memories of my time with Rachel or the horrific image of her fall.

After my shower, I walked to the closet, intending to find formal attire. I didn't care what others thought I should do; I knew what I needed to do as Alpha.

My hand froze as I reached for a tailored suit, remembering Rachel's expression the first time she saw me in formal wear.

No. I need to erase Rachel and the child from my mind.

I returned to the living room, but startled, found Tyler still waiting.

"Why are you still here?" I asked Tyler.

I shook my head, running a hand through my hair. "I'm fine. You haven't slept all night. You can go get some rest."

I checked my family watch and saw I had only ten minutes to reach my first meeting on the other side of the castle. I headed for the door, feeling marginally more composed.

Footsteps followed me down the hallway.

"I thought I told you to get some sleep," I said without turning, adjusting my cufflinks.

"If you don't need sleep, then neither do I," Tyler replied. "Nathan... can we talk about this?"

"What is there to talk about?" I asked flatly.

I glanced at Tyler, seeing how exhausted he was.

"What's done is done, Tyler," I said. "Did you get a chance to look at Raymond's report on the border attacks?"

Tyler's eyes widened, shocked as he heard what I said.

"Yes, I've read it. But—"

"Good. So that's more important," I cut him off, walking into the meeting room with Tyler following.

I reminded myself I had a job to do.

No matter how much my chest ached, no matter how much I couldn't understand why Rachel would do this to me—right now, I was Alpha, and we were facing a border war crisis.

Everything else would have to wait.