Chapter 123 A Comforting Hug
\[Becky’s POV\]
Stop it.
The tears continue to fall down my face.
Stop crying like a little bitch.
They’re soaking my shirt along with my own damn snot.
Why are you acting like this?”
Goddess, what was happening to me? Why was I letting all these frustrating emotions get the better of me?
Ugh. I hated this. I hated everything about this, and yet…
I want someone to comfort me.
Shock rushes through me as this single realization dawns, and when I look up, I find that Raelyn has gotten out of bed and is almost to me.
As she moves, Osiris fusses about, but to my surprise, he doesn’t attempt to stop her.
“What do you want?” I sniffle when she reaches me. “Have you come to make fun of me?”
“No,” she responds, giving me a look that makes my chest hurt. “I just… Just thought that you could maybe use a hug.”
As she speaks, she slowly reaches out, tentatively and hesitantly. It is clear that she is waiting to see exactly what it is that I’m going to do, and when I don’t move to stop her, she wraps her arms around me.
Tensing, I try to make sense of what exactly is happening.
Why was she hugging me?
How could she act like absolutely nothing happened between us?
And why did it make me feel so warm to have her do such a thing?
“You’ve done well,” she tells me, beginning to rub soft circles on my back. “You’ve held on well.”
At her words I feel sobs begin to rush through me, causing my body to shake and large fat tears to escape my eyes. And as I feel myself coming undone, my arms are wrapping around Raelyn like she is the only thing holding me above water.
I don’t know how long I stand there, clinging to Raelyn, sobbing my eyes out, before I finally begin to relax. However, even then I don’t let go; I don’t want to, but when Jean’s hand reaches out and touches my shoulder, I lift my gaze.
“I think it is best for the both of you to lie back down.” She tells me, and I remember that we aren’t out in the world but instead both in the hospital.
“I’m fine,” I assure her, turning my gaze to Raelyn and finding that she looks a little pale. “But what about her?”
“She should lie back down.” Osiris says, grabbing Raelyn and lifting her while she insists she is fine. “You shouldn’t have left her standing that long.”
“Osiris,” Raelyn huffs, giving him a look of annoyance. “How could you say such a thing?”
“Come,” Jean says, placing a hand on my back. “Why don’t you come and sit down at least?”
For a moment, I don’t move as I consider what it is that she is telling me.
Even though I do want to go sit down and make sure that Raelyn is fine, I know that I don’t deserve to do such a thing.
Not after the way things have been lately.
Frowning, I let memories of everything come to me, and when I remember exactly what it was that Raelyn said, I find myself faltering for the first time.
Was what she said the truth, and all this time I have hated the wrong person?
And if that was the case, would there be any way for me to make up for it?
Wasn’t it bad enough that an innocent person was hurt because of me and…
My thoughts trail off as I look down at my stomach and touch it, rubbing it while thinking of the tiny creature that is in it.
An innocent child will be born without a father because of it.
“Becky.”
Raelyn’s voice drifts through my thoughts, dragging me back to the present and stopping me before I can really start to spiral. And when I turn to take her in, I find that she is smiling at me.
“Don’t you think that we should have a nice long talk?”
Remaining silent, I consider what she has said while wondering what exactly I could even say to try to make everything okay.
Now that I was starting to realize my mistakes, I wanted to make amends and possibly reconnect with my oldest friend, but did I even deserve such a thing?
There’s no better time than the present. The small voice in the back of my head speaks, urging me to take a hesitant step and then another. Why not try to develop a proper support system? You’re going to need it.
“Okay,” I murmur, slowly walking into the room while Osiris and Jean watch me with differing expressions. “But is it really okay?”
“Of course.” She tells me, and I find myself remembering all the good times of the past.
Even if Raelyn could be rough around the edges and stubborn, she was always kind and caring towards those that she cared for.
Honestly, I knew that. I always knew that, but I just couldn’t see past my own jealousy and anger.
Feeling ashamed, I continue to move forward until I’m in the middle of the room, and then before I can even stop myself, I’m dropping to my knees.
“I’m sorry,” I yell, my voice echoing around us. “I’m so sorry.”
“Becky!” Raelyn gasps, attempting to get up only to be stopped by Osiris. “What are you…”
“Let her,” Osiris says, his voice cold. “Isn’t this the least she could do after everything you’ve been through? She hurt you, schemed behind your back, and did things that are honestly unforgivable. I honestly don't feel like an apology is enough."
"But…"
"He's right," I say, knowing that what Osiris said was correct. "This isn't nearly enough to make up for what I did to you, but I can't think of another way. I listened to Stephen back then instead of you. As your best friend, I should have listened to what you had to say, and I should have taken your side."
I was the worst, and I guess everything that happened to me recently was karma's way of getting back at me, but even that didn't seem like quite enough.
"I'm sorry," I repeat, feeling like a large weight was being lifted from me. "And from this point on, I'll do whatever it takes to prove to you that I mean it."